Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
SEAL Team Six

SEAL Team Six Assigned New Mission to Combat Burnout

VIRGINIA BEACH, VA – In a sign health care has truly reached crisis proportions, ...

Amazon Echo

Cardiologist Extremely Disappointed by Amazon Echo

DALLAS, TX – Unable to visualize any cardiac images let alone make any useful ...

parallel universe missing pens

Breaking: NASA Finds Parallel Universe Containing All Our Missing Pens

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) has discovered all of ...

APGAR 10 Apgart Apgar(t) troponin troponins

New Apgar(t) Score to Check Troponins 1 & 5 Minutes After Birth

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) is modifying the ...

Meu

Redacted Mueller H&P Omits All But Family History & Chloride Level

WASHINGTON, D.C. – A redacted version of Robert S. Mueller III’s highly-anticipated history & ...

staph staff

The Difference Between Staff & Staph

Over the past several weeks, Gomerblog has observed an uptick in medical documentation mishaps ...

tooth emojis

Breaking: Tooth Numbers Replaced By Emojis

CHICAGO, IL – In a long overdue update to its tooth chart, the American ...

ACTH stim test serum cortisol

New ACTH Stim Test Measures Serum Cortisol Every Minute

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Today new guidelines released by the Endocrine Society (ES) encourage modification ...

bed control

Bed Control Totally Out of Control

BOSTON, MA – Bed Control at Massachusetts Captain Hospital (MCH) is “totally out of ...