Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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Ophthalmologist Palpates Retina with Finger As Part of Dilated Eye Exam

NORCROSS, GA – Area ophthalmologist Rick Cavalier believes in taking full advantage of dilated ...

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Impressive: Radiologist’s 25-Hydroxyvitamin D Level is -400 ng/ml

SOMEWHERE IN THE HOSPITAL BASEMENT WHERE THERE IS NOTHING BUT TOTAL DARKNESS AND BATS – ...

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The Difference Between an Ear Canal & the Erie Canal

Unless you’re an otolaryngologist from upstate New York, understanding the differences between an ear ...

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Nephrologist Feels Wrong Eating Bowl Full of Kidney Beans

TAMPA, FL – Reluctantly bringing the spoon to his mouth after spending a few ...

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In Cruel Prank, Surgeon Steals All of Anesthesia’s Drapes

SCHAUMBURG, IL – The American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) has called a rare emergency ...

Hypocrite: Dermatologist Went to Nude Beach Without Sunscreen

OCHO RIOS, JAMAICA – The American Academy of Dermatology (AAD) is in crisis mode ...