Tuesday, April 23, 2024

Surgery

Friday ‘Dump Job’ Ends Back on Hospitalist

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PORTLAND, MA – Hospitalist Dr. Doug Moore was trying to plan ahead for his upcoming weekend.  He knew he had to take Ms. Williams off his list to have a completely free weekend.  Dr. Moore tried...

Surgeons Remove Penis, Sex Toy Saved

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NEW YORK, NY - Surgeons at University Hospital of Manhattan have performed a remarkable surgery on an unnamed male patient who presented to the Emergency Department with his penis and testicles caught in a sex toy/restraint...
Colonoscopy Game

PlayStation 3 to Unveil ‘Colonoscopy’ Video Game

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SAN MATEO, CA – PlayStation developers plan to release the highly anticipated Colonoscopy 2016 video game to the public soon, with 2,000 special orders already being sold.  The excitement over this revolutionary colonoscopy game is...
medical student menu

Medical Student Paged ‘Stat’ for Fecal Disimpaction Case

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PHOENIX, AZ - At 2:30 a.m., medical student Amanda Williamson was abruptly woken from her deep sleep to a STAT page.  "At first I didn't realize what was going on.  Medical students are never paged...

Raising Obesity BMI Classification to 35 Would Cut Obesity Rates by 42%

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WASHINGTON, DC - Obesity has become a significant burden upon the medical system in the United States and the American Medical Association (AMA) has decided to fight back. Last year, the AMA took steps to proclaim...
eyeball retina

Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia

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MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years.  Surprisingly, that fear is the fear of touching or looking at eyeballs, otherwise called ommetaphobia. “It just...
thank you cards

Urology Resident Leaves Husband After Sizing Up the Competition

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WHITE PLAINS, NY - Unfortunately we have to report on another sad tale of how graduate medical education can take a toll on families.  It seems that Dr. Sylvia Smythe, a first-year urology resident, has filed for...
Laparoscopic surgery

Flatulence to Blame for Failed Laparoscopic Procedure

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IOWA CITY, IA – Yesterday was a typical operating day at Holy Cross Hospital in room #12 until 1:45 p.m.  The room was a general surgery room full of appendectomies and other laparoscopic procedures. ...
Sudoku

Anesthesiologist Calls for STAT Sudoku Help in OR 3

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PHOENIX, AZ – St. Joe’s Outpatient Surgery Center’s anesthesiologist Dr. James Robinson was twenty-two minutes into performing anesthesia on a 31-year-old ASA 1 for a knee scope, when he suddenly needed help.  “Right away...

Spouse of Surgical Resident Charged with Polygamy

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YONKERS, NY - 27-year-old Emily Follingsworth was charged with polygamy yesterday in Yonkers, NY, days after her second wedding.  Follingsworth, a spouse of a fifth-year neurosurgical resident, could not believe what she had done. “I had completely...