Surgery

Patient Boldly Quits Smoking Day Before Surgery

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CINCINNATI, OH – Local resident Charles Shoemaker has decided to stop smoking the day before his total knee replacement.  "I’ve heard there are many...
or-drapes

Surgery & Anesthesia Ready to Take Things to the Next Level & Remove the...

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Gossip alert!  According to our sources, Surgery & Anesthesia in OR 5 are ready to take things to the next...

The Definitive Bone Rankings

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Globogym Headquarters, CA- It’s interview season for 4th year Medical Students applying for residencies and every area of medicine has a beloved question that...
medical pager

October 16, 2015: National Toss Your Pager in the Trash Day

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Finally.  Pagers are on their way out for good! To the delight of physicians, physician assistants, nurse practitioners, nurses, and any other health care provider who...

New Weight Loss Surgery to Bypass Stomach, Mouth Completely

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BALTIMORE, MD – Calling the new procedure a “miracle in bariatric surgery,” physicians at John’s Hopkins University spoke at a press conference last Saturday...
patient satisfaction flag

Al Qaeda Claims Responsibility For Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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GUANTANAMO BAY, CUBA - A detainee with confirmed ties to Al Qaeda made claims yesterday that the group operates an American corporation designed to...
emergency department

Intern Shocked to Discover TV Residency and Real Residency Vastly Different

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BALTIMORE, MD - Dr. Anita Campbell dreamt of becoming a physician for years.  Three months ago, she finally graduated from medical school to fulfill...
surgeons

American College of Surgeons to Publish New “Because I Said So” or BISS-Based Medicine...

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WASHINGTON, DC - A press release today from the American College of Surgeons stated, “After years of putting up with the satanic nonsense known...
nursing diagnosis

Report: Ability to Wear Scrubs to Work is Only Thing Keeping Health Care Professionals...

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CHICAGO, IL - According to a recent poll of nearly 20,000 health care professionals jointly conducted by the American Academy of Physician Assistants (AAPA), American...

AAOS: Osteoporosis Renamed Bone Failure

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“Bone failure. It’s the new hotness. Now let’s start taking it seriously!”