Urologist Does Double-Take at Correct Pronunciation of “Prostate”
ST. PAUL, MN - After 20 years of clinical practice as Professor of Urology at the University Institute, Dr. Nick Riviera had effectively become...
Stricter Operating Room Attire Policy Now Calls for Decapitation
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - After extensive evidence-based research, recent updates to the hospital policy for OR hats and attire were released at the staff...
Medicare Institutes New ‘Gratuity-Based’ Compensation Plan
WASHINGTON, DC - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) began the rollout of their revolutionary new compensation model this week, in which physicians...
Local Jeweler Proposes with 4-Karat Kidney Stone Ring
COLUMBUS, OH - On a recent romantic trip to the yellow river in Asia, world-renowned jeweler Rocky Ureter of Columbus, Ohio popped the question to his longtime...
Local Man Loses Arm in Lawnmower Accident, ‘Why Can’t My Arm Be Made of...
WITCHITA, KS – Kevin O’Neil had an unfortunate accident yesterday where he lost his right arm. “I was reaching into the mower to clear...
Emergency: Navy Urologist Calls Out ‘All Hands on Dick!’
NORFOLK, VA - Realizing that this simple procedure was taking a turn for the worst and giving him more than he can handle, Navy urologist...
Woodstock Veteran Disappointed to Learn New Joint Made of Titanium and Plastic
BERKELEY, CA - Bill “Doobie” Bogarter fondly refers to Woodstock as the “best two weeks I can’t remember.” He was the first faculty at...
Pediatrician About to Call Surgery to Lay Hands on Another Punky-Looking Kiddo
2AM, KNOXVILLE, TN - According to seventh floor pediatrics ward sources, local pediatrician and hospitalist Dr. Jerry Dirkins is about to call for another...
Amidst Obesity Epidemic, Task Force Creates Glasgow Food Coma Scale
ATLANTA, GA - In response to the public health crisis of food comas resulting from the ongoing obesity epidemic, the 3N Joint Task Force,...
Psychiatric Trauma Code Successfully Implemented
ALAMEDA COUNTY MEDICAL CENTER - Following the model set by their colleagues in Trauma Surgery and Emergency Medicine, the Psychiatry Department has implemented a new...