Surgery

gauze

Mildly Annoyed Surgeon Throws 4×4 Gauze Across Operating Room

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KEOKUK, IA – According to reports from Mercy Hospital, local general surgeon Greg McKelvey became so mildly frustrated by the OR staff, that he threw...
Spock Star Trek

Spock: “Patient’s Demands for Dilaudid Highly Illogical”

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STARFLEET - Mr. Spock of the USS Enterprise has informed Gomerblog that he finds his patient's demands for Dilaudid and other narcotics "highly illogical." He confided...
FaceLyft

Lyft Offshoot FaceLyft Offers Patients Rides To, From Plastic Surgeons

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Catering to the very specific niche of passengers needing rides to and from their plastic surgery appointments, Lyft's new offshoot...
periorbital mass nose

Ophtho Relieved That Periorbital Mass Is Just the Patient’s Nose

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AUGUSTA, GA - Thanks to the assistance of both Oncology & ENT, a local ophthalmologist is relieved to find out a patient's periorbital mass...

Big Pharma Launches Implantable Throat Filter Against Coronavirus

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A major pharmaceutical company has launched a device to fight against the COVID-19 pandemic. The state-of-the-art implantable throat filter was unveiled at a product...
incentive spirometer incentivized spirometer

A Step-by-Step Guide on How to Use Incentive Spirometers (or Marijuana)

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Is this your first time using an incentive spirometer (or marijuana)?  Well, you're in luck: our Gomerblog team has created this easy 15-step process...
urologist

Urologist Does Double-Take at Correct Pronunciation of “Prostate”

ST. PAUL, MN - After 20 years of clinical practice as Professor of Urology at the University Institute, Dr. Nick Riviera had effectively become...
surgery

Medical Student Discovers Niche in Surgery as Edward Retractor Hands

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MADISON, WI - "That’s not my real name, but it works," stated Jimmy M. Smith, a third-year medical student from UW Madison Medical School. The...

Elephant Complains of Chest Pain ‘Like a Human Sitting on My Chest’

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NEW YORK, NY - At approximately 6:00 AM this morning, a local elephant named Eli the Elephant developed excruciating ten out of ten chest...
the sun

Health Care Providers Unsure What That Bright Yellow Glowing Orb is in the Sky

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CHARLESTON, SC - In an eye-opening new study published in the latest issue of JAMA (Just Another Medical Association), researchers at The Medical University...