Surgery

Diaper City: Storm Cloud Incontinent of Water

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OKLAHOMA CITY, OK - Embarrassed that it has once again woken up in the middle of the night unintentionally soaked just like the people...

Study: Reason For 100% of Mandible Fractures Clear After Meeting Patient

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The latest study from the Journal of Oral and Maxillofacial Surgery has confirmed the clinical gestalt of thousands of emergency physicians: If a patient has...
donut hole ACA

Affordable Care Act to Close Donut Hole with Delicious Strawberry Filling

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WASHINGTON, DC - For years, the Medicare Part D coverage gap or “donut hole” had always left senior citizens with a less-than-sweet taste in...

Orthopedic Surgeon Creates a Cyborg by Mistake After Replacing Every Joint in the Body

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“It wasn’t till my 80-year-old patient told me, 'Hasta la vista, baby,' that I realized that she has been turned into a T-810 by...
ehr

EHR team regrets letting clinicians vote on project name as BONER upgrade goes live

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Multiple Electronic Health Systems consultants expressed regret Monday over a poorly conceived plan to allow clinicians to vote on their system's project name as...
cpr clear

ZDoggMD: Clear!

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We should petition CPR classes to just show ZDoggMD's video.  The excruciating 8 hour class could be summed up in 3 minutes.  Hands only...
anesthesiologist hospital

Hospital Replaces Anesthesiologists with Voice-Activated OR Tables, Saves Millions

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SAN JOSE, CA - In what appears to be a medical first, surgeons at Methodist Northwest Hospital have found that using voice-activated operating room...
Turlaudidryl, BDT

Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...

Badass Surgeon Performs Whipple While in Tuxedo

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AUSTIN, TX - The bar for badassery has been raised a notch, so surgeons take note: veteran general surgeon Bob Cooper has just completed...
paper cut level VIII trauma center

Level VIII Trauma Center Can Only Take Care of Paper Cuts Really

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SANDERSVILLE, GA - Sandersville Medical Center, a recently-opened Level VIII Trauma Center located two hours southwest of Atlanta, barely has any resources whatsoever and...