Breaking: Buick Undergoes Surgery for Glove Compartment Syndrome
ATLANTA, GA - Stuffed to the gill with unpaid parking tickets and losing Lotto tickets, a Buick in the hospital parking lot is undergoing...
Surgical Resident Delivers Mid-Case, Stays to Close
MASS. GENERAL HOSPITAL - Dr. Hannah Richards, a 3rd year surgical resident, was 39+0 weeks pregnant going into Thursday. She scrubbed into Dr. Alexander's hemicolectomy...
General Surgeon Goes Entire Year Without Washing Hands
Dr. Ima Nass, a general surgeon from Illinois, was recently demoted for going an entire calendar year without washing his hands in the hospital. ...
Local Medical Student Struggles to Explain His Eagerness to Place Foley Catheter on Male...
ANN ARBOR, MI - Local medical student Dan S. started his first rotation today in Surgery. “I woke up at 2:45 am arrived at...
Dr. Oz’s Colonoscopy Reveals That He’s FOS
CLEVELAND, OH - After years of nauseating lies and verbal diarrhea, America’s leading medical quack Dr. Oz finally underwent a much needed colonoscopy today...
‘I’ve Never Met a Pupil That Wasn’t ERRLA’ by Emergency Physician Paul O’Connor
I’ve been doing this job for almost 30 years, and let me tell you, never in my professional career have I ever met a...
Rosetta Stone Unlocks Mystery of Ophtho Notes
LONDON, ENGLAND - In breaking news, archeologists have uncovered a missing piece to the Rosetta Stone, the ancient stone slab on which the Memphis decree...
Doing His Part: Urologist Unveils Telehealth Prostate Exams
With the COVID-19 pandemic threatening to overwhelm healthcare systems, physicians have had to get creative in the ways that they care for patients. Recently,...
AANS Now Requires Coumadin Gauntlet Prior to Starting Anticoagulation
CHICAGO, IL - Due to a recent study that has shown how the simple act of taking anticoagulant medications increases one’s fall risk, and...
Stricter Operating Room Attire Policy Now Calls for Decapitation
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - After extensive evidence-based research, recent updates to the hospital policy for OR hats and attire were released at the staff...