Game of Thrones HMOs Going Bankrupt
KINGS LANDING, WESTERNOS - Following a three-year onslaught of unexpected increases in operating cost, all five major health maintenance organization (HMO) companies serving the Seven...
Orthopaedic Surgeons in Minnesota Bracing for Landslide of Injuries from Vikings Fans Jumping Off...
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - Following the Vikings loss this weekend, orthopaedic surgeons in the greater Twin Cities area are standing by for an influx of lower...
VIP Treatment Offers Merlot, Pinot Noir as Surgical Prep
MILL VALLEY, CA - As hospitals across the country merge into corporate conglomerates, they lose their identity, much like identical Walmarts taking out Mom...
HHS Announces New Crack Down on Illicit Cardiac Massage Parlors
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Officials from the Department of Health and Human Services Monday announced a joint operation with Departments of Homeland Security and the...
Medical Ethics: Magician Orthopedist Elects Not to Saw Patient in Half Due to Conflict...
LAS VEGAS, NV - In an apparent conflict of interest, orthopedist and amateur magician, Dr. Felipe Ross, elected not to saw his patient in...
Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’
CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...
Unchartered Territory: Doctor Makes Patient NPO After Discharge
DURHAM, NC - Stating that the outside world contains enough variables to make pulmonary aspiration a true and serious risk, hospitalist Mack Reynolds has...
Flatulence to Blame for Failed Laparoscopic Procedure
IOWA CITY, IA – Yesterday was a typical operating day at Holy Cross Hospital in room #12 until 1:45 p.m. The room was a...
Woman Not Sure if She’s Using Crutches Correctly
TOWSON, MD - A local woman by the name of Mary Ellis, who sustained a fracture of her right medial sesamoid bone during a...
Women to be recruited into ortho with promise of no line for bathroom
The American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons has begun a new campaign to entice women to enter a career in orthopaedic surgery. Dr. David Bonaparte,...