Surgery

surgery

Medical Students Secures “Honors” In Surgery After Successfully Naming Last 5 Songs From Pandora

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DURHAM, NC - In what has been declared the finest academic performance seen in a generation, local medical student Brian Mills successfully named the title...

23 Million Americans Watch Royal Wedding, No Decline In Patient Care Among ROAD Docs...

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With the estimation that 23 million Americans had their eyes glued to the television to watch the royal wedding of Meghan Markle and Prince...
orthopedic surgeons

Nation’s Surgeons Announce Plans to Sit on It

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USA - In a unified statement from general surgeons across the country, the nation’s surgeons have announced a plan to sit on it until...
hospital workers

Research Indicates All Bleeding Stops Eventually

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BETHESDA, MD - According to sources at the NIH, yes, it is true: all bleeding stops.  This insight came to much relief of general surgery intern,...
TLC

Sign Out: Patient Just Needs a Little TLC

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ATLANTA, GA - A patient is transferring out of the medical intensive care unit today and, according to the MICU team, "just needs a...
doctor on computer

Alternate Phrases for “This is a Very Pleasant…”

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It’s not uncommon to start a history of present illness (HPI), assessment, or discharge summary with the following phrase: This is a very pleasant…...

Bovie Electrocautery Receives FDA Approval for Cutting Red Tape

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SILVER SPRING, MD - In an unprecedented move by the Food & Drug Administration (FDA), Bovie electrocautery has been approved for both incisional and excisional...
divine intervention NPO after midnight miracle insurance authorization

God Denies Involvement in Cancer Treatment and Recovery

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HOPE VALLEY, CA -Twenty months after being diagnosed with lung cancer, 67-year-old Denise Dewberry has been declared cancer-free by her doctors.  She claims her...
thank you cards

Urology Resident Leaves Husband After Sizing Up the Competition

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WHITE PLAINS, NY - Unfortunately we have to report on another sad tale of how graduate medical education can take a toll on families.  It seems that...
donut hole ACA

Affordable Care Act to Close Donut Hole with Delicious Strawberry Filling

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WASHINGTON, DC - For years, the Medicare Part D coverage gap or “donut hole” had always left senior citizens with a less-than-sweet taste in...