Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use
COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever. The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...
Orthopod Caught Listening to Femur with Stethoscope
ATLANTA, GA - In an awkward moment at a patient's bedside earlier today, orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley was caught doing what can only be...
Local Man Loses Arm in Lawnmower Accident, ‘Why Can’t My Arm Be Made of...
WITCHITA, KS – Kevin O’Neil had an unfortunate accident yesterday where he lost his right arm. “I was reaching into the mower to clear...
Medicine Consulted for History and Physical
IOWA CITY, IA - The University of Iowa Orthopedic Department has gone "all-in." At 13:36 on Thursday, Orthopedic Surgery finally took the plunge from the...
Hipster Loses Left Testicle Due to Excessively Tight Pants
WILLIAMSBURG, NY - Hipster Fletcher Jones was admitted to the emergency room last night with numbness and tingling around the groin. The incident occurred...
Crooked Hillary Actually Suffering From Severe Scoliosis
CHAPPAQUA, NY - Former Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton’s Spine Surgeon today revealed that President Donald Trump’s calling her “Crooked Hillary” on the campaign...
A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain
Hello, and good afternoon to you. Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or...
Clinic Handing Out Free Organ Samples
OXFORD, MS - Remember the good old days when you could get free drug samples from your doctor? Well, clinicians at Mississippi Health do. ...
Body Image Issues Linked to Color-Coded Hospital Scrubs Size
PALO ALTO, CA - Scrubs are fairly shapeless. If you can discern shapes, the wearer is likely pregnant or wearing the wrong size. The ultimate...