Surgery

patient in hospital NPO after discharge

Tips: How to Worsen Your Already-Terrible Bedside Manner

78
You may find your bedside manner is pretty terrible given how busy you are and your general frustration with humanity as a whole.  If...
ortho algorithm

American Board of Hospitalists Publishes Guidelines for Orthopaedic Imaging

0
Hospitalists manage extremely complex disease processes that require intense critical thinking and deep analysis to properly diagnose and treat. Bones, however, are quite straightforward. If...

Friday ‘Dump Job’ Ends Back on Hospitalist

1
PORTLAND, MA – Hospitalist Dr. Doug Moore was trying to plan ahead for his upcoming weekend.  He knew he had to take Ms. Williams off his...

Orthopod Writes a Longer Note Than Hospitalist: Metaphysical Calamity Ensues

0
KEARNEY, NE - Fatefully cleaving the time line in two, an orthopedic surgeon at Kind Humanitarian Hospital (KHH) wrote a progress note longer than...

Trump Unites Us All with Plan to Build Wall Around Hospitals, Prevent Admissions

0
CLEVELAND, OH - In front of supporters at the Republican National Convention, Donald Trump has unified not only the Republican Party but also Americans,...
eyeball retina

Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia

0
MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years.  Surprisingly, that fear is the fear...

Some Lovers Try Positions That They Can’t Handle, Break Hand Bones in Process

0
RALEIGH, NC - GomerBlog has confirmed this morning that some local lovers tried positions that they ultimately couldn’t handle and broke several carpal bones...
oral surgeon

Oral Surgeon Alerts Anesthesia to Low Blood Pressure

0
LOS ANGELES, CA - Yesterday, in a remarkable feat of interdisciplinary work, Mike Fellers, DDS alerted his anesthesia colleague to low blood pressures. “It occurred right...
cerumen impaction earwax

Breaking: New Earwax Impaction Guidelines Released, World Rejoices

0
ALEXANDRIA, VA - YES!!!!  The American-Academy of Otolaryngology-Head and Neck Surgery has dropped some serious knowledge on the world with their newly-published and much-anticipated updated...
Master Chief halo

Breaking: Halo’s Master Chief Placed in Halo to Immobilize C-Spine

0
EARTH - Gomerblog has learned in its time travel to the 26th century that Halo hero and Spartan super soldier Master Chief has been...