Restaurant Patrons Sickened After Eavesdropping on Medical Professionals During Meal
HAMDEN, CT - It was a chaotic scene at the local 24-hour diner as a mass casualty incident (MCI) requiring the response of multiple...
Obama Breaks Wrist, Fails To Find Doc Who Accepts His Insurance
WASHINGTON, D.C - Earlier today during a pick-up basketball game with congressional notables, President Obama attempted a slam dunk and landed awkwardly on his...
Federal Aviation Administration’s Checklist-Oriented Outpatient Surgery Center Closes After Every Patient Dies
WASHINGTON, DC - In what many practicing clinicians have called “not at all surprising” and “what dimwit funded this incredibly stupid idea?” the FAA has...
Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use
COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever. The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...
Increased Consults for ‘Cold Extremities’ Occurring During Snowstorm, ER Docs Puzzled
JERSEY CITY, NJ - A shortage of vascular surgeons has been discovered in the north- east due to an absurd amount a vascular consults...
Local Man Relieved He Was Able to Yell at His Surgeon Just Before Going...
HERSHEY, PA – Early reports are coming in that local man, Frank Demmer, chewed out his surgeon in pre-operative bay five. "I’m just happy...
DIY Appendectomy Kit Now Available
With surgeons’ schedules increasingly filled, a DIY appendectomy kit has been created to save both patients' and doctors' time.
“Appendectomies are really easy,” said general...
Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50
ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...
‘Toodles’ Purchased from Disney by Medtronic, OR Complications Hit All-Time Low
ORLANDO, CA - Medical device giant Medtronic pulled off a risky, but fatefully brilliant move recently. For $1.2 billion dollars, the company purchased the...
Breaking News: 10 Bucks Says an Orthopod Drives This Car with a Skeleton Hanging...
PITTSBURGH, PA - Okay, okay, breaking news into Gomerblog headquarters: a yellow convertible had just been spotted in Point State Park with a miniature skeleton...