Lazy Eye Not Even Trying to See
TALLAHASSEE, FL – In an embarrassing show of pure slothfulness, the right eye of 28-year-old Christopher Chang has become so lazy that it won’t...
EHR team regrets letting clinicians vote on project name as BONER upgrade goes live
Multiple Electronic Health Systems consultants expressed regret Monday over a poorly conceived plan to allow clinicians to vote on their system's project name as...
Big Pharma Launches Implantable Throat Filter Against Coronavirus
A major pharmaceutical company has launched a device to fight against the COVID-19 pandemic. The state-of-the-art implantable throat filter was unveiled at a product...
AANS Now Requires Coumadin Gauntlet Prior to Starting Anticoagulation
CHICAGO, IL - Due to a recent study that has shown how the simple act of taking anticoagulant medications increases one’s fall risk, and...
Hospital Merges with Fast Food, Tobacco Companies to ‘Stay Competitive’
CHICAGO, IL - As you pass by the ER entrance at Cook County Hospital, the unmistakable aroma of grease, processed burgers, and cigarette smoke...
How to Ace Your Ortho Residency Interview
1. Know your favorite bone. Nothing looks worse for an applicant than showing up for the interview and not knowing what your favorite bone....
Anesthesia Resident Finishes Reading Entire Internet During Free Flap Surgery
NEW YORK, NY – John Silk, a fourth-year anesthesiology resident at State Medical Hospital in New York, will now have his name immortalized in...
Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’
CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...
Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor
Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom.
Emergency Medicine
Go skydiving to get the...
As Nurse Leans In for a Listen, Patient Can Think of No Better Time...
BOSTON, MA - As Nurse Ned Franks leans in with a stethoscope to listen, patient Andy Charles can think of no better time today than right...