Fearless Neurologist Attempts to Order Brain Stem Biopsy Via EHR
ST. LOUIS, MO - It was Tuesday morning in the middle of rounds when local bad boy neurologist, Dr. Chinstrap, felt his next stroke...
Surgeon General to Reverse Opioid Epidemic with Whopping Dose of Narcan
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Acting Surgeon General Sylvia Trent-Adams has unveiled a new strategy against the nation's opioid epidemic, and it simply involves giving the...
DIY Appendectomy Kit Now Available
With surgeons’ schedules increasingly filled, a DIY appendectomy kit has been created to save both patients' and doctors' time.
“Appendectomies are really easy,” said general...
Avagard Widely Replaced by Gym Chalk in Ortho Surgery Centers
FREEHOLD, NJ - Avagard, the surgical hand antiseptic is now being replaced in many orthopedic surgery centers across the globe. The replacement? Large bowls...
Anesthesiologist and Surgeon Can’t Agree on Patient’s Care by Midnight Deadline, Hospital Shutdown Ensues
ROANOKE, VA – Dr. Foster was experiencing some bleeding during his right hemicolectomy. He asked, “What is the patient’s blood pressure?” Dr. Heathstrom looked up from...
So You’re Paged While in a Bouncy House, What to Do Next
There you are, jumping around happily in a bouncy house when the unthinkable happens: you get paged. Well, maybe not unthinkable since you are...
Surgeon Recommends Amputation as Means of Improving Weight Loss Outcomes
LOS ANGELES, CA - Los Angeles-based vascular surgeon Dr. Jackson Dyers has begun recommending that his patients living with obesity undergo above the knee...
Breaking News: Orthopod Places Ex Fix on Ex Fix
SEATTLE, WA - Questioning if the external fixation device (or ex fix) placed on a patient’s leg is stable enough for the job, Harborview Medical...
Crisis Brewing as Unit 61’s Coffee Machine Broken
SEATTLE, WA - A huge crisis is brewing at Arabica Medical Center this morning as medical staff have discovered that the hospital’s best coffee...
Hoping for a Powerball Miracle, Healthcare Providers Across America Drafting Resignation Letters
EVERY CLINICAL SETTING, UNITED STATES - Healthcare providers across the United States are hoping it’s an early holiday present in 2016, as every single one...