Surgery

Sudoku

Anesthesiologist Calls for STAT Sudoku Help in OR 3

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PHOENIX, AZ – St. Joe’s Outpatient Surgery Center’s anesthesiologist Dr. James Robinson was twenty-two minutes into performing anesthesia on a 31-year-old ASA 1 for...

Slow-A** Da Vinci Holds Up Lines, Taking Forever to Vote

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WASHINGTON, DC - The Da Vinci Surgical Robot is proudly exercising his right to vote this Election Day, but here's the problem: he's slow...

The Updated Hippocratic Oath for Health Care Professionals

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I swear by Epic Hyperspace, by eCW, by Allscripts, by AthenaHealth, and by all the Coders and Accountants, making them my witnesses, that I...
orthopedic surgeons

Nation’s Surgeons Announce Plans to Sit on It

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USA - In a unified statement from general surgeons across the country, the nation’s surgeons have announced a plan to sit on it until...

Some Lovers Try Positions That They Can’t Handle, Break Hand Bones in Process

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RALEIGH, NC - GomerBlog has confirmed this morning that some local lovers tried positions that they ultimately couldn’t handle and broke several carpal bones...

Diagnostic Criteria for a ‘Train Wreck’ Patient

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How does one identify a train wreck?  GomerBlog polled 1,000,000 health care providers in the last 48 hours and the general consensus is that,...

Hospital Rat Mistaken for Pokémon

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CHICAGO, IL - Northwestern University Hospital had a false alarm Saturday, where several employees mistook a hospital rat for a rare Pokémon.  "I was...
glove compartment syndrome

Breaking: Buick Undergoes Surgery for Glove Compartment Syndrome

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ATLANTA, GA - Stuffed to the gill with unpaid parking tickets and losing Lotto tickets, a Buick in the hospital parking lot is undergoing...
wine pairs

Tips: What Wine Pairs Well with Patients & Helps Me Cope with Them?

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We’ve all been there.  You’re at bedside with your patient and you find yourself stumped on which wine you should drink to best pair...

Pediatrician About to Call Surgery to Lay Hands on Another Punky-Looking Kiddo

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2AM, KNOXVILLE, TN - According to seventh floor pediatrics ward sources, local pediatrician and hospitalist Dr. Jerry Dirkins is about to call for another...