Surgery

Ortho Outraged Pharmacy Doesn’t Carry Methicillin, Wonders How to Treat Patient with MSSA

0
WOONSOCKET, RI - Despite numerous cultures coming back as Methicillin Sensitive Staph aureus, most pharmacies no longer carry the ancient antibiotic. This hasn't been an...
peyton manning

Peyton Manning No Longer Has The Arm Strength to Deliver Papa John’s Pizzas

0
DENVER, CO - According to Denver Broncos team doctors, aging 39-year-old quarterback Peyton Manning’s arm strength has significantly diminished to the point where he...
pina coladas

Ortho Likes Pina Coladas, Getting Caught in the Rain

0
SANTA MONICA, CA - In a stunning development that has taken place just over the past few minutes, Gomerblog has learned that Ortho likes...

OR Shutdown Enters Third Week as Drape Wall Dispute Remains Deadlocked

0
KEARNEY, NE - An operating room at Kind Samaritan Hospital (KSH) has entered a third week of shutdown as Anesthesia and Surgery continued to...

Near Death Experience for Medical Student After Taking Chart During Change of Shift

0
MILWAUKEE, WI - Richard Henning, a third-year medical student, has no idea how close he came to perishing at Memorial Hospital yesterday.  At approximately 7:04 a.m.,...
curbside

Doctor Curbsides Doctor at Curbside

0
ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog is on scene to report that Dr. Andrea Pascal of Internal Medicine has just curbsided Dr. Andy Rapp of Infectious Diseases at curbside,...
patient cocoon

Medical Team Unable to Penetrate Patient’s Protective Blanket Cocoon

20
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - “I think it’s alive,” whispered intern Jason McCarren to nurse Mya Roberts, both at the patient’s bedside puzzled. “Are you sure?”...

Game of Thrones HMOs Going Bankrupt

2
KINGS LANDING, WESTERNOS - Following a three-year onslaught of unexpected increases in operating cost, all five major health maintenance organization (HMO) companies serving the Seven...
old man

Pioneering Bionics Company Gains FDA Approval for Robotic Penis

0
E-Rextion Bionix has proudly announced that its breakthrough HeteroErectus Cyberpenis enhancement prosthesis will soon be available to patients in the U.S. market who so...