Surgery

Obese Guy with BMI Classification

BMI Classification Replaces Word “Obesity” with “American”

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GENEVA, SWITZERLAND - The World Health Organization (WHO) has revised its BMI (body mass index) classification system, a simple and widely used method for...
Foley, bloodbath

Patient Can’t Wait to Yank Out Foley, Cause Bloodbath

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ATLANTA, GA - In exciting news today, patient Arnold Starks has announced that later today he will yank out his Foley with "full force...
Messi

Copa America: Da Vinci with Brilliant Save on Messi

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SEATTLE, WA - In the 68th minute, Argentina's Lionel Messi dribbled past three defenders and unleashed a shot from point-blank range.  But the Da Vinci...
cell phone brain cancer

Alarming Study Finds Malignant Brain Cancers Appear on Side of Cell Phone Use

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BOSTON, MA - A new multi-center randomized study to be published next week in Medicine found that a whopping 52.4% (+/- 3.67% with p-value 0.02) of brain cancers are...
eyeball exam

Internal Medicine Resident Performs IPPA on Eye Exam OSCE Station

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An internal medicine resident at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver, Canada provided some much-needed entertainment for a bored OSCE examiner during part...
new starbucks drink

New Surgical-Themed Starbucks Drinks

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The highly successful sales campaign of Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino has got the Starbucks’ marketing team all fired up and ready to target another demographic...
anesthesiologists tone

Rectal Tone of Anesthesiologists Varies with Patients’ Oxygen Saturation

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BERLIN, GERMANY - A new and controversial study out of the esteemed Higginstein Community Surgery Center describes a curious phenomenon regarding rectal tone of anesthesiologists...

Northeast Hospital the First to Institute Eyebrow Covers

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A recent change in the rules governing the role of hair coverage has caused a frenzy among all surgical staff. Whereas before, a bouffant...

Dr. Clinton Gets Away with Wearing Pantsuit in OR

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - A shocking story coming from Bethesda Medical Center, where Hillary Clinton has been wearing a pantsuit in the operating room.  She refuses...
open laparoscopy above-the-nipples

Pioneering Surgeon Performs World’s First Open Laparoscopy

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BOSTON, MA - A major breakthrough took place today as a general surgeon at the Massachusetts Generalizable Hospital performed and successfully completed the world's...