General Surgery Intern Contaminates Sterile Field with Tears
SAN DIEGO, CA - In what is believed to be a first-time occurrence, general surgery intern Crabby Boots cried during an open hernia repair...
Winnie Can’t Pooh, Needs Surgical Intervention
SUSSEX, ENGLAND - In breaking news, Winnie the Pooh can't pooh and is in fact obstructed, necessitating surgical intervention. "Oh, D-D-Dear!" cried Piglet. "I...
HIPAA Loosens Up, Just Say Whatever, Whenever, Wherever the Hell You Want
WASHINGTON, DC - Doctors, nurses, and other health care practitioners nationwide are breathing a sigh of relief this morning as government officials have loosened...
New Orthopedic Surgery Simulator a Warehouse Filled with Tree Stumps, Blunt Ax
PORTLAND, OR - Oregon Health and Sciences University recently unveiled their innovative new orthopedic surgery simulator, which consists of a large industrial warehouse filled...
Urologist Cannot Find Ureter, Consults OB/GYN
Dr. Hans Veener, the chief of urology, could not identify the right ureter during a recent surgery at Marion General Hospital. Shockingly, rather than...
Plastic Surgery Summer Fellowship Teaches Students How to Match Cufflinks with Pocket Watches
NEW YORK — Students enrolled in the Plastic Surgery Summer Fellowship were surprised when they were instructed via electronic mail not to report to...
Doctor Wins Lottery: Patient List Free of Jerks, A**holes
NEW YORK, NY - Internal medicine physician Damien Sharp won the medical equivalent of a lottery jackpot today: his patient list is completely devoid...
Game of Thrones Pain Scale
Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale? Spice it up by using the...
Surgeon Sends Lunch for Frozen Section
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - After visiting the hospital's cafeteria, Dr. Jason Greene seated himself in the surgery staff lounge to enjoy his lunch. But a...
Game of Thrones HMOs Going Bankrupt
KINGS LANDING, WESTERNOS - Following a three-year onslaught of unexpected increases in operating cost, all five major health maintenance organization (HMO) companies serving the Seven...