Surgery

polar vortex

Breaking: Polar Vortex Blamed on Subzero OR Temperatures

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SILVER SPRING, MD - Begging surgeons to keep operating room doors closed as much as possible, the National Weather Service (NWS) has cited the...

Breaking: Surgeon Asks Anesthesia to Lower His Tray Table

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DELTA 291 - Citing numerous reasons why he couldn't perform the maneuver by himself, passenger and general surgeon Richard Patton has asked Anesthesia to lower his tray table...
malpractice attorney

Malpractice Attorney Says Nightly Prayer for More Medical Errors, Deaths

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MEMPHIS, TN - Mark Edmunds, JD, a local medical malpractice attorney, is proud to be a caring father, a giving person, and a devout Christian.  He...

Introducing the ‘Dude-Vinci,’ The 1st Robot for Orthopedic Surgery

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DAYTON, OH - A cutting-edge surgical robot has been approved by the FDA and purchased for use in the orthopedic suite at a local...

Orthopaedic Surgeons Declared Strongest Species on Earth

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GABORONE, BOTSWANA - Inspired by the 2018 World’s Strongest Man competition, local orthopaedic surgeon Jamies Baylee started pondering if there exists a species of...
hospital gown ass crack

CDC Recommends Not Tying Gown in Back to Promote Airflow Through Ass Crack

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ATLANTA, GA - After a thorough review of the evidence, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) will make the formal recommendation that...
traffic jam Flonase

Doctor Tries to Clear Up Traffic Congestion with Flonase

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ATLANTA, GA - Sincerely hoping that the rush-hour traffic this afternoon is just a manifestation of seasonal allergies, internist Roger Willoughby has just given...
level I level II

Patient Survives & Beats Level I Trauma Center, Moves On to Level II

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ATLANTA, GA - It has been a challenging year for 27-year-old Michael Snead, who broke his right femur in a motorcycle accident 6 months...

Surgeon Drops Pen, Chart, Falls Off Chair, Then Spends Rest of Appointment Convincing Patient...

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MEMPHIS, TN – Dr. Slater had a series of unfortunate events Thursday.  While he was sitting on a circular roller chair, Dr. Slater started...
beginning runners pages tPA

Psychiatric Trauma Code Successfully Implemented

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ALAMEDA COUNTY MEDICAL CENTER - Following the model set by their colleagues in Trauma Surgery and Emergency Medicine, the Psychiatry Department has implemented a new...