Orthopaedic Surgeon Pays $400,000 to Prevent Son From Matching Into Ophthalmology Residency
BOSTON, MA - Inspired by the recent college admissions cheating scandal, local Orthopaedic Surgeon Brock Hammersley took matters into his own hands when his...
The Updated Hippocratic Oath for Health Care Professionals
I swear by Epic Hyperspace, by eCW, by Allscripts, by AthenaHealth, and by all the Coders and Accountants, making them my witnesses, that I...
Differentiating ACLs from ACLS: A Primer
GLOBO GYM, MA - Like most orthopods, I know a lot about ACLs. Unfortunately, I’m also required to take ACLS biennially. When my schedule...
So You Dropped Your Pager into the Toilet, What to Do Next
You're on-call, but before sh*t hits the fan, you hit the toilet. Just when you're pulling up your pants or fixing your belt, you...
New Hospital Beds Harder to Figure Out Than Acid-Base
NASHVILLE, TN - Medical staff at Nashville Memorial Hospital are completely baffled by a new fleet of hospital beds on Unit 55-G, saying that...
Operating Room Swear Jars Set to Pay Down National Debt by 2018
WASHINGTON, DC – The American College of Surgeons was pleased to announce today that their “Operating Room Swear Jar Initiative” will soon generate enough...
Breaking: 400-lb. Patient Not Actually Big-Boned
AUBURN, AL – Albert “Big Al” McGriddle has been told all his life by his Mama that he wasn’t fat, he was just “big...
Urology Resident Leaves Husband After Sizing Up the Competition
WHITE PLAINS, NY - Unfortunately we have to report on another sad tale of how graduate medical education can take a toll on families. It seems that...
Orthopod Bewildered by Internist with Bigger Biceps
LOS ANGELES, CA - "How can it be??!!" wondered orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley, scratching his noggin with his oversized mitts. "Thor don't understand!" You...
Medicare Institutes New ‘Gratuity-Based’ Compensation Plan
WASHINGTON, DC - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) began the rollout of their revolutionary new compensation model this week, in which physicians...