Surgery

orthopedic surgeons

Ortho Calls Temporary Truce in Turf War

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Dr T.K. Anderson, chief of orthopedics at Salter & Harris Memorial Hospital made a stunning announcement in the face of the COVID-19 pandemic. “We...

Nadal Calls Medical Timeout After Limbs Fall Off During Epic Rally

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FLUSHING, NY - No. 1 seed Rafael Nadal cruised to victory in his opening match against Dujan Lajovic despite calling a brief medical timeout...

Diaper City: Storm Cloud Incontinent of Water

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OKLAHOMA CITY, OK - Embarrassed that it has once again woken up in the middle of the night unintentionally soaked just like the people...

‘Drama Surgery’ Officially Listed as New Specialty by ACGME

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This fall, fourth-year medical students everywhere are able to apply to a ‘woke’ new specialty: Drama Surgery. “Due to the increasing number of millennials interested...
menu book

Book of Delivery Menus Missing, 20 Night Nurses & Doctors Die of Hunger

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AUGUSTA, GA - Medical personnel, patients, and families at Augusta Medical Center (AMC) are in mourning this morning as 20 night nurses and physicians...
crossfit

Orthopaedic Surgeon Admits to Inventing CrossFit to Finance College for His Children

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LOS ANGELES, CA – After his twin daughters were both accepted to Ivy League colleges starting in 2000 and already paying for his son’s...

Breaking: Medical Student Cuts Surgical Knot Too Short

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Medical student Dan Richards was disciplined Thursday for cutting a surgical knot "too short" during a skin closure. "The surgeon told me...
waiting on hold on phone

Fears Grow As Even More Doctors Die On Neverending Phone Hold

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ATLANTA, GA - The CDC released chilling statistics demonstrating an epidemic of doctor deaths while on endless phone holds.  "This is a disturbing trend,"...

Hospitals forced to tap their strategic reserves of breast augmentation supplies

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For the past several weeks, the Covid 19 pandemic has had a devastating affect on the citizens of the entire world. No one has...

Orthopedic Library is Actually just a Gym

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A detailed undercover investigation has discovered that the orthopedic library is merely just a gym in disguise. The signs should have been obvious...