Newly Promoted General Surgeon’s Business Cards, A Little Too True
LOS ANGELES, CA – UCLA’s newly promoted general surgeon, Assistant Professor William Heffner, just received his updated business cards today. An unfortunate error in...
Breaking: Medical Student Cuts Surgical Knot Too Short
PHILADELPHIA, PA - Medical student Dan Richards was disciplined Thursday for cutting a surgical knot "too short" during a skin closure.
"The surgeon told me...
Ortho Consults Medicine for Surgical Management
BIRMINGHAM, AL - In an act that most definitely crosses the line, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has consulted Medicine for surgical management of a...
Ortho Calls Temporary Truce in Turf War
Dr T.K. Anderson, chief of orthopedics at Salter & Harris Memorial Hospital made a stunning announcement in the face of the COVID-19 pandemic. “We...
Hangry Intern Opens Up Vintage Packet of Graham Crackers from 1981
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Figuring that there was no better time to celebrate than during this particular overnight call, University of California, San Francisco (UCSF)...
FDA Approves First Antibiotic/Male Impotence Drug: Mycoxaflopin
WASHINGTON, DC - The Federal Drug Administration has recently approved the first medication that will combat both bacterial infections and male impotence. Mycoxaflopin, a...
Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes
EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
Breaking News: Operating Room Finishes On-Time
In a bizarre occurrence, the operating theatre at St Margaret’s Hospital managed to complete a full caseload without delays or running “over time.”
Despite best...
EHR team regrets letting clinicians vote on project name as BONER upgrade goes live
Multiple Electronic Health Systems consultants expressed regret Monday over a poorly conceived plan to allow clinicians to vote on their system's project name as...
Patient Able to Get Dilaudid Just Before Leaving AMA
JACKSONVILLE, FL – Michael Redmond - a patient so regular to St. Joseph Hospital’s ER that if he doesn’t show up for a couple days,...