Surgery

INR 0 ENT

Unfortunate Plastic Surgery Leaves Man Nearly Identical To Nicholas Cage

0
SALEM, OR - The title tells the tale.  Oregonian Nate Carthage is now nearly identical to Nicolas Cage after an unfortunate plastic surgery mishap....
surgeon biopsy malignant fusion

Surgery Residents Bring Other MDs to Work for a Day

0
5:00 am: Arrive at hospital. Peds and Psych are borderline comatose still. Medicine seems confused to find that the hospital lights work this early in...
crotch groin testicles

USPSTF Recommends Against Getting Kicked in the Balls Repeatedly

0
BOSTON, MA - In an update of their 2006 recommendation statement, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force (USPSTF) now recommends against getting kicked, smacked,...
hospital staff meeting

Mandatory Hospital Staff Meeting to Improve Morale Fails to Improve Morale

0
COLUMBIA, SC - ED Staff at Our Lady of Gluten Intolerance Hospital (OLGIH) finished yet another required but uncompensated hospital staff meeting last week...
urological association

Lyrics to the Men’s Health Christmas Carol Favorite: “Check Your Balls”

0
It is the Season of Giving.  Don’t put your d*ck in a box to spread that Christmas cheer; instead, consider performing a testicular self-exam....

Surgeon Summons the Dark Lord Xepneumotep to Scrub In

5
CHANCELOR, NC - Dr. Mathers, a surgical oncologist, decided to take on a pancreatic cancer patient whose cancer had engulfed a large portion of the liver....
sponge bath

New Patient Satisfaction Initiative Mandates That All Patient Baths Have “Happy Ending”

38
CARY, NC - In a bold and unprecedented move to increase patient satisfaction scores, administrators at Our Lady of Chronic Narcotic Dependence Hospital outside...
picking nose

ENT Cannot Bear to Watch as Man Picking Nose Tempts Fate

0
ATLANTA, GA - Sure, otolaryngologist Eric Osawa was trying to enjoy his day off today, but has now found himself at a coffee shop looking...

Michael Kors Designs Surgical Gown Line for Spring

70
From couture gowns to handbags, and now to surgical gowns, there's no telling what Michael Kors will do next. The plain paper or fabric surgical...
graham crackers

97% of World’s Graham Cracker Supply Located in Hospital Drawers, White Coat Pockets

0
BOUND BROOK, NJ - A study in the latest issue of the New England Journal of Snack Foods (NEJSF) has confirmed that 97% of...