So You Dropped Your Pager into the Toilet, What to Do Next
You're on-call, but before sh*t hits the fan, you hit the toilet. Just when you're pulling up your pants or fixing your belt, you...
FDA Approves First Antibiotic/Male Impotence Drug: Mycoxaflopin
WASHINGTON, DC - The Federal Drug Administration has recently approved the first medication that will combat both bacterial infections and male impotence. Mycoxaflopin, a...
Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot to Craft the Perfect Ham and Cheese Sandwich
CLEVELAND, OH - After finishing up his cases for the day, an oncological surgeon brought sandwich supplies with him to a vacant operating room...
Local Medical Student Struggles to Explain His Eagerness to Place Foley Catheter on Male...
ANN ARBOR, MI - Local medical student Dan S. started his first rotation today in Surgery. “I woke up at 2:45 am arrived at...
Copa America: Da Vinci with Brilliant Save on Messi
SEATTLE, WA - In the 68th minute, Argentina's Lionel Messi dribbled past three defenders and unleashed a shot from point-blank range. But the Da Vinci...
Hospital Eliminates July from Calendar, Decreases Mortality 3,000%
BOSTON, MA - Hospital administrators nationwide are hailing a successful new effort described as “downright brilliant” to help curb hospital mortality by eliminating July from...
Urologist Anxiously Awaits Cryptorchid Ball Drop
SAN DIEGO, CA – Local Urologist, Aric Triwenga MD, has an eccentric tradition that he carries out every New Years while hundreds of millions...
The Fantasy Google Electronic Medical Record Vs. Reality
Maybe Google needs to be hired for the next generation of electronic medical records. Most of us would appreciate these new changes.
Pilot Makes Passengers NPO After Midnight for Flight Tomorrow
ATLANTA, GA - In an effort to minimize the risk of aspiration during tomorrow's three-hour East coast flight from Atlanta's Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport to Boston's Logan...
Surgeon Excited to Watch Prep Dry
CHICAGO, IL - It’s no secret that Dr. Mike Flannigan likes to watch the prep dry on all his patients. According to numerous sources...