Surgery

Med Student Wows Surgeon with Suction Technique

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DENVER, CO – Medical student James Taverny turned heads in the OR when he made history with perfect suction technique during an open cholecystectomy...
new medical interns

Hospital Eliminates July from Calendar, Decreases Mortality 3,000%

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BOSTON, MA - Hospital administrators nationwide are hailing a successful new effort described as “downright brilliant” to help curb hospital mortality by eliminating July from...
wine pairs

Tips: What Wine Pairs Well with Patients & Helps Me Cope with Them?

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We’ve all been there.  You’re at bedside with your patient and you find yourself stumped on which wine you should drink to best pair...

Concerned Podiatrist Probes Foot Ulcer Down to Aorta

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Initially concerned a diabetic foot ulcer might in fact be osteomyelitis, podiatrist Alice Short not only successfully probed the ulcer...
chloraprep

Donald Trump’s Orange Complexion Due To ChloraPrep From Last Plastic Surgery

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WASHINGTON, D.C - The U.S. Surgeon General accidentally revealed in a recent interview that President Trump’s skin tone is actually a normal shade of...

Standardized Patient Suing Medical School After No One Detected Prostate Cancer

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TAMPA BAY, FL - 56-year-old Michael Finnerly has been volunteering his services to the local medical school's standardized patient program for several years.  Last week he was...
trauma pumpkin

Halloween Pumpkin Carving Scenes at the Hospital: Updated

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PUMPKINVILLE, PATCH, U.S.A. - Look at these pumkins that were admitted to the hospital! OR maybe  medical professionals with a warped sense of humor,...
voice recognition

New Voice Recognition Software ‘Dragroan’ to Dictate Physicians’ Exasperated Groans & Sighs

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SILICON VALLEY, CA – Speech recognition software company Dragon, used by doctors and other professionals worldwide for transcription, announced the launch of a new...
hedge, hedging

Radiologist Admits He Loves Hedges

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ATLANTA, GA - Area radiologist Michael Feuerstein admits that he loves hedges beyond comprehension.  "I love my wife, I love my kids, and I...
Black & Blue Friday

ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’

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IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...