Medical Team Unable to Penetrate Patient’s Protective Blanket Cocoon
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - “I think it’s alive,” whispered intern Jason McCarren to nurse Mya Roberts, both at the patient’s bedside puzzled.
“Are you sure?”...
Normal Saline vs. Lactated Ringer’s: Results of a Phase 3 Randomized Quadruple-Blind Clinical Water...
BACKGROUND: The superiority of Lactated Ringer’s solution (LR) or normal saline (NS) in fluid resuscitation in a variety of medical and surgical scenarios remains...
Thousands Dead in Battle Between Ophthalmologists and Optometrists
WASHINGTON, DC - Thousands of eye care providers were found dead in the streets Monday morning after a vicious battle erupted between ophthalmologists and...
Plastic Surgeons Return from a Successful Trip Providing Breast Augmentations to Underserved Women
OLYMPIA, WA- When Maria Perez of Huanuco, Peru turned 18 and still had small breasts her parents did not know what to do. “We...
Poll Reveals Most Attending Surgeons Secretly Jealous About 80-Hour Work Week
EGAN, ND - A poll of practicing surgeons at the recent Society of Magnificent Surgeons meeting revealed that 92% of those polled were secretly...
Orthopedic Applicant Tears Phonebook in Half to Seal Interview
NEW YORK, NY - By the time Dr. Johnny "The Hammer" Utah, a fourth-year orthopedic resident at SUNY, Empire State, was applying for his...
New Ophthalmology Intern Not Sure How to Spell Ophthalmology
IOWA CITY, IA - It was a rough start to the year for first-year ophthalmology resident Tony Beamer, who was recently caught trying to spell "ophthalmology," the name of...
Search-and-Rescue Spots Man’s Penis Under Fourth Panniculus
CHICAGO, IL - Gomerblog has some exciting news to report: 59-year-old Fred Turntable is crying tears of joy this morning after he was reunited...
Urology to Use Nutcracker in OR During the Holidays
TOPEKA, KS – Urologists at Mercy Hospital have announced plans to perform surgery with the help of an 8-foot-tall wooden nutcracker during the holiday...
[Video] Da Vinci’s Monster Jam Helps Cavs in Must-Win Game
CLEVELAND, OH - The Cavs suited up their secret weapon on Saturday: the Da Vinci robot. In his only appearance, Da Vinci James' performance...