Tuesday, June 2, 2020

Critical Care

beginning runners pages tPA

Breaking: Code Team Pushes tPA to Lyse Clogged Toilet

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DURHAM, NC - Acknowledging they were within the 4.5-hour window since symptom onset and had no other clear alternatives, a Code Team at Duke University Hospital pushed tPA in the hopes of lysing the clogged...
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ICU Signout: ‘Codes Every Few Minutes, But Otherwise Stable’

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - During signout for the patient transferring out of the medical intensive care unit (MICU) today, third-year medical resident Louis Jenner said matter-of-factly to the hospitalist take over his...
heavy metal

Heavy Metal Now First Line in Treatment of Symptomatic Bradycardia

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DALLAS, TX - New advanced cardiac life support (ACLS) guidelines from the American Heart Association (AHA) now recommends heavy metal as the first line treatment of symptomatic bradycardia. "Last...

Newborn Nursery’s Infant Capacity Increases 50% by Hiring Former Tetris Champion

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ATLANTA, GA – The Newborn Nursery at Swedish Covenant Hospital has seen a dramatic increase in their patient capacity after hiring a former Tetris champion to maximize placement of babies. Stephen Glasgow, who from...

ICUs Convert to Starbuck Sizes for Fluid Management

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In an effort to stay current with a younger generation of doctors and nurses, the American Association of Critical Care Medicine (AACCM) has altered their guidelines to use “Starbucks” sizes for fluid management. Terms...
73 miles per hour

New Code Potassium Repletion Team to Revolutionize Inpatient Care

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NASHVILLE, TN - Health care professionals will tell you if there is one epidemic that deserves greater attention than the opioid and obesity epidemics it is that of not repleting mildly-low potassium levels fast...
therapeutic hypothermia

Therapeutic Hypothermia Ineffective in Patients with Hypothermia

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LOUISVILLE, KY - Therapeutic hypothermia, the deliberate reduction of core body temperature to 32 to 34 degrees Celsius, was found to be ineffective and even harmful in the treatment of patients suffering from hypothermia,...
U.S. economy crashes ICU

Breaking: U.S. Economy Crashes, Transferred to ICU

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NEW YORK, NY - Gomerblog has learned that the U.S. economy is crashing and is no longer stable for the medical floor.  It has been transferred to the medical intensive care unit (MICU) for...

In Drastic Cost-Cutting Measure, Local Hospital Restricts Use of Albumin in Landscaping

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To help meet financial goals for the upcoming fiscal year, University Hospital administrators voted to implement draconian restriction criteria for the use of albumin at a Pharmacy & Therapeutics committee meeting last week. Commonly...
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