Internal Medicine

doctor notes DVT PE

Hospital Gets Rid of Patients, Doctors to Spend 100% of Time Writing Notes

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State Hospital Medical Center has made headlines across the nation today by shutting its doors to human patients.  Physicians will now spend 100% of...
joint commission

Joint Commission Mandates New Pain Scale That Goes to Infinity

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - The Joint Commission believes that when a patient has “20 out of 10 pain” it isn’t the patient’s fault, it’s...

Diagnostic Criteria for a ‘Train Wreck’ Patient

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How does one identify a train wreck?  GomerBlog polled 1,000,000 health care providers in the last 48 hours and the general consensus is that,...
fall risk

Study: Anticoagulation Initiation Instantly Increases Your Fall Risk

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BOCA RATON, FL - Finally proving what most doctors already have suspected for decades, Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram presented his research data which demonstrated the direct causative...

Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated

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RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning.  She found...
vaccine theory

ZDoggMD: I Was Wrong About Vaccines

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Finally, ZDoggMD has taken the lead and has come to admit that he has been wrong on vaccines for decades.  It took courage and...
unicorn

Investigation Reveals Dilaudid Manufactured From Unicorn Tears

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Reports from a three year long undercover investigation reveal that Pharmagen has been manufacturing dilaudid using a tremendous volume of unicorn tears. The 3,000...

Updated 2016 Med/Surg Unit Inventory Guidelines

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It’s that time of year to take inventory of what’s on our Med/Surg units.  These things are required for the quintessential Med/Surg experience.  Bust out...
declaration of independence

Life, Liberty, and Opioid Pain Medicine: Lost Version of Declaration of Independence Unearthed

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - Archaeologist and historian Dusty Bookman announced on Thursday that he unearthed a lost draft of the Declaration of Independence among Thomas Jefferson’s...

Narc Madness

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It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4!  This year...