Post-Cardiac Arrest Fonzie Not Eligible for Therapeutic Hypothermia, “He’s Already Too Cool”
MILWAUKEE, WI - The critical care service at Sweet Sweet Mercy Hospital has denied Fonzie a potentially life-saving intervention. He recently suffered an out...
Brilliant Chemist Gives up Dream of Curing Cancer, Focuses Efforts on Inducing 3 ½...
CAMBRIDGE, MA - Citing practical reasons, 41-year-old renowned chemist and laboratory researcher Charles Kenzington, Ph.D. has formally ended his three-decade quest to discover a...
Medical Schools to Replace Curriculum with Year-Long Course in ICD-10 and E&M Coding
In a visionary statement, the deans of ten of this nation’s top medical schools, including four Ivy League schools announced today that they are...
Med Student Performs History & Physical on Broken Fax Machine
ATLANTA, GA - It was an unusually slow day and second-year medical student Bryan Orlando bugged his inpatient medicine team for a new patient...
CDC Confirms ‘Something Going Around’
ATLANTA, GA – In a recent press briefing, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention confirmed reports that something has been going around. Constance Bentley,...
Hospital Administrator Delivers Clutch Performance During In-Flight Cardiac Arrest
DENVER, CO - Passengers and crew are counting themselves fortunate tonight as their United Airlines flight from Los Angeles to Chicago made an emergency landing...
Typo Accidentally Sends Doc to PubeMed Website, Not PubMed
BALTIMORE, MD - It took hospitalist Christopher Gray a few moments of staring at steady stream of pictures involving male and female genitalia to realize...
ER Refuses to End Hospital Shutdown Until IM Agrees to Admit All Drunks
NEW ORLEANS, LA – Tulane Medical Center has shut down the hospital after negotiations between the Emergency Room (ER) and Internal Medicine (IM) failed...
Following $2 Million Lottery Win, Doctors Still in Debt
WASHINGTON, DC – After months of pooling their money and purchasing lottery tickets, a group of local resident doctors have won the Virginia Lotto’s...