American Academy of Drug Seekers Releases 2016 ED Pain Management Guidelines
BALTIMORE, MD - Acknowledging that the nationwide effort to reduce opiate abuse in the ED has led to dangerous levels of undertreatment among their...
Hypodilaudemia Epidemic Reaches Painful Proportions
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Department of Health and Human Services reports this morning that there has been a recent spike nationwide in...
20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
After Obesity is Classified as a Disease, Ralph Calls In Sick for the Fourth...
HOUSTON, TX – At United Data Centers Inc., a web development company, Ralph Summers has called in "sick" four times in the last month....
Hospital Makes Ultimate Economic Move: Quits Credentialing Doctors
In a surprising move today, Nevercare General Hospital announced that it will close its medical staff office and stop credentialing doctors.
"It only makes sense," said...
Brand New Vital Sign Added to Monitors and Electronic Medical Records
SAN DIEGO, CA – New governmental regulations passed last week by Congress have created another vital sign, making this the 6th core vital sign,...
Local Physician Brings Daughter to Work, Helps Tell Patients They Are Overweight
HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Chris Zanick, a primary care physician, has been struggling to talk to his patients about being overweight. He solved this...
On-Call Doctor Celebrates Birthday with 17 of His Closest Patients
CHICAGO, IL - Absolutely convinced that there was no better way to spend this special day, on-call internal medicine physician Jack Romeo celebrated his 34th birthday with 17 of...
Breaking: Ronald McDonald Suffers ST-Elevation McFarction
OAK BROOK, IL - Beloved clown mascot Ronald McDonald has suffered another heart attack this morning, and was taken to Oak Brook Medical Center...
Stickers for Drug Seekers Program Gaining Momentum
CHARLESTON, SC - An innovative new program implemented at Charleston Clinic is successfully deterring patients suspected of having drug-seeking behavior from returning to their healthcare system,...