Internal Medicine

mosquito

West Nile Virus Murdered By East Nile Virus In Latest Ugly Episode Of Viral...

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LAS VEGAS -- The Las Vegas Police Department has confirmed the shocking news that the West Nile Virus (WNV) has been brutally shot to...
smoking lounge

Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients

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CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its...
online doctorate program

Online Doctorate of Nursing University Under Review as a Possible Scam

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WASHINGTON, DC - The University of Online Degrees (UOD) is under investigation by the FBI regarding their online Doctorate of Nursing program for being...
bicarb-only sodium bicarbonate

FDA Studying Bicarb in Treatment of Coronavirus

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Desperate times call for desperate measures. Numerous drugs are being studied in the treatment of novel coronavirus, but the Food...

Breaking: VA Pick Ronny Jackson Withdraws from Both Nomination, Opioids

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Citing the "baseless and anonymous attacks on my character" as well as intractable abdominal cramps, lacrimation, and rhinorrhea, White House physician Rear...
driving to ED

Uber Rolls Out New ED-to-ED Transit Service for Drug Seekers

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Filling a niche in a market that has been underserved for years, on-demand transportation company, Uber, has rolled out a novel...
happy hour for health care workers

The Medical Professional Development Drinking Game

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All health professionals will have to participate in some sort of mandatory professional development from time to time.  Whether it’s an organization-wide initiative to...
toilet paper

FDA Recommends Americans Reuse Toilet Paper

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - It is well-known that we are still in the midst of the Great Toilet Paper Crisis of 2020. In a...

Black Cloud Begs On-Call Meteorologist for Help

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NEW HAVEN, CT - Finding herself underdressed & underprepared for this torrential downpour of admissions and cross-cover calls, third-year medicine resident and self-diagnosed black...

Placebo Gene Discovered, Thousands of Studies Invalid

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CLEVELAND, OH – In what many are describing as the biggest biology discovery since DNA’s double helix, researchers have discovered the placebo gene. A team...