Homeopath to Drug Seeker: ‘I Thought You Said Dilute It’
SEATTLE, WA - Friday, local drug-seeker Garrett Ashton was reportedly shocked to learn that his Dilaudid was not available for pick-up, and in fact,...
After Another Horrid Shift, Doctor Calls Palliative Care on Self, Goes Home with Hospice
ATLANTA, GA - For internist Karen Davenport, today’s shift was the straw that broke the camel’s back. She struggled mightily as she was asked...
Teaching Team Consults Magic 8-Ball for Assistance
NEW YORK, NY - "Will my patient need placement?" intern Jamie Dreessen asked the Magic 8-Ball, shaking it solidly for 15-seconds before placing it on...
Joint Commission Riding Out COVID-19 Outbreak With Heads in Sand
OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL – In the ongoing fight against the novel coronavirus, healthcare workers across the country have been resorting to all sorts of innovative...
Study: Doc McStuffins More Evidence-Based Than Dr. Oz
ANAHEIM, CA - Public health researchers have published the results of a new study which sought to objectively measure the quality of medical advice given...
Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes
The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.” It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
Diaper Blowout Grading Scale Released by AAP
WASHINGTON, DC - The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and the American Nursing Association (ANA) sponsored: Multidisciplinary Diaper Change Task Force released a consensus...
Vaccinations Now Definitively Linked to Pregnancy
BOSTON, MA - A new study just published in the Old England Journal of Medicine now definitively links childhood vaccinations to pregnancy. Jenny McCarthy,...
A Practical Guide to Intravenous Line Insertion for Interns by a Cynical Resident Post...
1. Decide if you really need the line. You can use this simple test. Approach your senior doctor and say, “The patient has really...
Desperate Hospital Endorses Dirty Sock as Preferred PPE
CHICAGO, IL—As coronavirus counts rise, local hospitals face shortages of personal protective equipment (PPE). With any remaining viable PPE hoarded in the homes of...