Nurses, Doctors Fight Back with New Health Care Practitioner Satisfaction Surveys
NEW YORK, NY - Sick and tired of the unfair nature of patient satisfaction surveys that puts service above disease management, a multidisciplinary team...
Dilaudid & Morphine Shortage Prompts Pharmacy to Switch to Heroin PCA Pumps
SMITHVILLE, AR - The ongoing rise in demand for opiate medications, combined with limited supply of intravenous narcotics has left physicians, nurses, and pharmacists...
Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level
KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
Hospital’s Electronic Health Record to Be Replaced by New, Efficient ‘Paper Chart’ System
NEW YORK, NY – Citing slow load times, confusing menu structure, and overall frustration with the user interface, St. Barnaby’s Hospital has announced that the...
Study: Doctors Can’t Operate an IV Infusion Pump Even If Life Depended On It
BALDWIN, NY - A new study in the New England Journal of Alaris (NEJA) confirmed something we knew all along: doctors can't operate an IV...
NEJM Bombshell: Sucks being the last admission of the night shift.
In what should not be a surprise to anyone, the New England Journal of Medicine published a study confirming that patients admitted at the...
HHS Announces New Crack Down on Illicit Cardiac Massage Parlors
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Officials from the Department of Health and Human Services Monday announced a joint operation with Departments of Homeland Security and the...
P.H.O.N.Y. The Newest Acronym Training Program for Improving Patient Satisfaction
Doctors and nurses are trained again and again on customer service but there is room for improvement. Following well-known acronym step programs comes …...
Natural Dilaudid Spring Discovered in Alps; Drug Seekers Scramble for Climbing Gear, Airline Tickets
GRINDELWALD, SWITZERLAND - A quaint Swiss town is experiencing the first wave of what is sure to be an epic boom in tourism this...
Narc Madness
It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4! This year...