chapped lips hot mess express

Patient Formally Diagnosed as Acute on Chronic Hot Mess

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SANTA FE, NM - After a battery of laboratory tests, radiographic imaging, and subspecialty consultations, a team of health care professionals has formally diagnosed...
loser health care job

This Just In: Your Health Care Job Sucks

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Hey YOU, that’s right, I’m talking to you. Gomerblog just wanted to take some time to let you know that your job sucks. Really....
hell

Dr. Oz & Joy Behar Birth Devil Offspring, Hell is Near

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THE NINTH CIRCLE, HELL - In a frightening development, it has been reported that Dr. Oz & Joy Behar, two of television’s most reviled...
icd-10 quiz

ICD-10 Primer, Lesson 6: OMG Codes

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Shockingly, the first week of the ICD-10 era has not been smooth, which is why the ICD-10 committee astutely created the OMG codes: a...

Cinnabon Creates New Insulin Rolls: Insulinabons

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SEATTLE, WA - American purveyor of cinnamon rolls and diabetes, Cinnabon has announced a new tactic to combat the obesity epidemic, not by changing...
Totally Unclear Murky Liquid Diet

Patient Put on Totally Unclear, Very Murky Liquid Diet

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AUSTIN, TX - Seeking to ruffle some feathers by going against the usual progression from NPO to clear liquids, hospitalist Roy McRoy placed his...
macaw icd-10

ICD-10 Primer, Lesson 1: Macaw Documentation

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October 1, 2015 marks the transition to ICD-10, a diagnostic system with a level of detail so specific that no one cares.  ICD-10’s greatest...
childhood obesity

New Product Release: Pediatric Power Chair for Morbidly Obese Children

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WHITE PLAINS, NY - In a shrewd but brilliant marketing move last week, Hoveranywhere announced plans to sell thousands of "smaller-sized" pediatric power chairs. The chairs are...
health care

Hospitalist Breaks His Own Record by Seeing 100 Patients in a Day

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Dr. Speedy Gonzalez didn’t realize untill he counted the number of patients at the end of a busy Saturday evening that he had broken...
double portions

No Way, Jose: Patient Request for Double Portions Denied, Made NPO as Punishment

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BALDWIN, NY - In a defiant stance against a patient Rick Moravsky's request for double portions despite his ongoing treatment for CHF (congestive heart failure)...