Study: The People’s Elbow is the Most Electrifying Move in All of ACLS
HAYWARD, CA - FINALLY! The Rock… HAS COME BACK... to cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR)! A new study in the New England Journal of Sports Entertainment...
Eastern Medicine Inspired Stroke Protocol Saves Millions in Health Care Costs, Improves Patient Satisfaction...
PORTLAND, OR - A cerebral vascular accident, commonly known as a stroke, is a devastating diagnosis that frequently results in long-term disability and death. Many...
Everyone Looking Forward to Tonight’s Hell-in-a-Cell, Steel-Cage Family Meeting
ATLANTA, GA - Sweet anticipation is in the air at Georgia Medical Center (GMC). No one plans on going home as everyone - patients,...
$1.3 Billion Saved by Eliminating Common Greetings in Patient Encounters Claim Managed Care Administrators
NEWPORT, RI - Managed care administrators have calculated that if physicians eliminate common greetings towards patients in the exam room, savings could mount in...
Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia
MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years. Surprisingly, that fear is the fear...
Startling Report: CDC Recommends Against Vaccinations, Anti-Vaxxers Now Demanding Their Right to Vaccinate
ATLANTA, GA - After a funding change, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) completed a meta-analysis using super statistical procedures and skewed...
New Vaccination Campaign Seeks to Eradicate Anti-Vax Movement by 2030
WASHINGTON, DC—Jenny McCarthy, once famous for a spread of nude photos in Playboy and now for causing the spread of measles in the US,...
Insurance Company to Start Paying Clients in Monopoly Money to Cut Costs
NEW YORK, NY - Insurance companies have been struggling to stay afloat over the past 5 years. Most are financially in the black as the...
New Intern Hands Attending Cup of Urine on Rounds
CHICAGO, IL – New medical Intern, Dr. Alexa Friedrich, disappeared after presenting a patient to her attending physician. She has been desperately trying to...
Crocs Now Adding Insulin to Footwear Line
NIWOT, CO - In a news conference last week, Andrew Rees, CEO of Crocs, Inc., announced that all new Crocs will now include microneedles...