Military Doctors Petrified if Motrin Found to Worsen Coronavirus
Military physicians are on the edge of their seats after an opinion article out of France mentioned that NSAIDs may worsen Coronavirus infections. Extreme...
Cardiologist Validates ‘Time to Burrito Consumption’ as Reasonable Cardiac Risk Stratification Tool
MOBILE, AL - Local cardiologist Dr. Mona Bee has just published a brand new risk stratification tool for coronary artery disease and her patients...
CDC Quarantines Jenny McCarthy
ATLANTA, GA -- Due to the severe flu outbreak this season, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has decided to examine the...
New Nurse Surgeon General Unsure Who To Page About Nation’s Slightly Abnormal Magnesium Level
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Office of the Surgeon General was thrown into chaos late last night when newly-appointed Acting Surgeon General Rear Admiral Sylvia...
New Littmann Stethoscope Allows You to Hear One’s Thoughts
ST. PAUL, MN - Manufacturer 3M has released a new Littman Mind-Reading I Stethoscope for health care practitioners to help diagnose someone else’s thoughts,...
Charting is Independent Risk Factor for DVT and PE, Study Finds
ROCHESTER, MN - Recognizing it is a form of immobilization in which health care professionals are unable to move around much, a study newly published...
Winnie Can’t Pooh, Needs Surgical Intervention
SUSSEX, ENGLAND - In breaking news, Winnie the Pooh can't pooh and is in fact obstructed, necessitating surgical intervention. "Oh, D-D-Dear!" cried Piglet. "I...
ID Doc Sends ‘Thank You’ Cards for Those Interesting Consults
NEW HAVEN, CT - Taking consultative manners into another echelon, a Yale infectious diseases doctor is sending "Thank You" cards to show her appreciation...
Patient Honest About How Much He Drinks
24-year-old Jimmy Cliff came to University Hospital today for his elective hernia repair, and during the pre-operative interview with the anesthesiologist, he did something...
AMA Holds Funeral Service for Physical Exam
The American Medical Association held a large funeral service today in honor of the Physical Exam, which passed away earlier this month after a...