Internal Medicine

Cardiologist Validates ‘Time to Burrito Consumption’ as Reasonable Cardiac Risk Stratification Tool

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MOBILE, AL - Local cardiologist Dr. Mona Bee has just published a brand new risk stratification tool for coronary artery disease and her patients...
smart phone

American Association of Doctors Considers Offering MD Degree to Anyone With a Smartphone

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CHICAGO, IL - Citing new evidence that most medical questions can be answered quickly, and occasionally accurately, online, a major physician-accrediting body is considering...
zika virus

CDC Urges Mosquitos to Wear Tiny Condoms to Fight Zika Virus

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ATLANTA, GA - During a landmark press conference yesterday afternoon, CDC Chief Epidemiologist Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram implored mosquitos to wear small condoms during intercourse in...

Woman Fakes Heart Attack to Make Flight Land at Her Real Destination

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GUNNISON, CO - A woman who couldn’t find a direct flight from Los Angeles to Gunnison, Colorado bought a ticket to Kansas City, Missouri instead....

Pros and Cons of a Nephrologist

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See also: - Pros and Cons of a Hospitalist - Pros and Cons of a Stethoscope

COVID-19: ACGME Redeploys Interns to Check on Healthcare Workers’ Parents

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CHICAGO, IL - The Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education (ACGME) announced that interns will no longer see patients not only to preserve personal...

Goat Sacrifice to Ba’al Replaces Medicine Rounds, No Change in Patient Outcomes

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During the seventh hour of internal medicine rounds one day, Dr. Frownalot had an intriguing idea. After hearing the resident present a patient with...
ketchup packet

Ketchup Packet in Random Clinic Drawer Turns 5 Years Old Today

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NEW YORK, NY - And a Happy Fifth Birthday today to the 9-gram Heinz Ketchup packet located in a random desk drawer in some...
doctor in er

Patient Honest About How Much He Drinks

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24-year-old Jimmy Cliff came to University Hospital today for his elective hernia repair, and during the pre-operative interview with the anesthesiologist, he did something...
garden gnome

Study: 90% Of Rectal Foreign Bodies Are Idiopathic

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - A recent retrospective review of Birmingham, Alabama confirms that 90% of rectal foreign bodies are idiopathic.  Colorectal surgeon Joshua P Dengle...