Internal Medicine

hospital gurney

Physician DCs Bed in Order to Get Patient to Leave Hospital

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DETROIT, MI - In a fit of mild rage and decisive action, local physician Dr. Enuf wrote his final order in the battle with an...

Doctor Makes His Pager DNR

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MARIETTA, GA - “It was time,” explained hospitalist James Smith as he caressed his American Messaging pager circa 1981 with its screen reminiscent of...
doctor

Ask a July 1st Medicine Intern

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Dear July 1st Medicine Intern, I’ve been wheezing a little bit more over the past few days and I’m worried that my asthma is starting...
Purell Foaming Body Sanitizer life-sized

Purell Releases New Life-Sized Foaming Body Sanitizer

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AKRON, OH - Realizing that clean hands was the tip of the iceberg, GOJO Industries, Inc. have announced their biggest and baddest Purell product yet:...
ejection fraction EF 100%

Perfect Score! Patient Has Ejection Fraction of 100%

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SAVANNAH, GA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, patient Edward Jacobs has just aced his cardiac exam, the transthoracic echocardiogram specifically, becoming the first...
pot of coffee

Huge-A** Pot of Coffee More Effective Than Bowel Prep for Colonoscopy

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ATLANTA, GA - The American Gastroenterological Association (AGA) has told Gomerblog that drinking a huge-a** pot of coffee is officially the bowel prep of choice...

Carinii Sues Pneumocystis for Alimony After He Runs Away with His Secretary Jirovecii

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MALIBU, CA – GomerBlog recently came across a public filing Thursday that had shocking implications.  Carinii, long known to be the partner of Pneumocystis,...
mips

A Hospital Administrator Explains: MIPS

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Hey everybody!  Are you having a good day?  I hope so.  How about this fantastic weather we're having?  Awesome, hey let’s talk about the...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...

Justin Timberlake: I’m Bringing Measles Baaaack

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Recently Justin Timberlake announced to the world that he is not planning to vaccinate his child.  Evidently all the scientific evidence looks different behind...