Internal Medicine

Report: Essential Hypertension, Not at All Essential

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PITTSBURGH, PA - Scientists discovered Wednesday that essential hypertension is not at all essential for life.  "We were totally wrong when we discovered hypertension,"...

The Most Interesting Man in Medicine‏

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He was admitted to school with a simple nod and a smile. As a student, his attending would ask him for advice. The lead surgeon assists...

Nursing Home STDs on the Rise, and I Just Threw Up a Little in...

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ATHENS, GA - "Simply disgusting," was one man’s response to hearing about nursing home sexually-transmitted diseases (STDs) on the rise.  "A little warning, next...
EKG

Cardiologist Admits to Just Using EKG Computer Interpretation for Over 15 Years

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TOPEKA, KS - Veteran cardiologist, Dr. Ernesto Rodriguez, appeared on 20/20 last night with a shocking revelation.  Dr. Rodriguez admitted to just using the computer...
Wonder Woman bracelets

Under Fire, Wonder Woman Uses Her Indestructible Bracelets to Deflect ER Admissions Left &...

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THEMYSCIRA - Wonder Woman has been under siege by emergency room personnel at Amazonian Medical Center, but doesn't seem fazed as her Bracelets of...

Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law...
drug side effects

Patient Asks About Side Effects, Gets Every Single One of Them

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What started off as a routine admission has sent shockwaves through the medical community. Doctors at Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (WTF) Hospital are reporting that...
Flonass

Flonass: Flonase’s Sister Spray for Anal Sniffles

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LONDON, ENGLAND - When the season's change - either from winter to spring or from summer to fall - we often focus on runny...

ABIM Rewrites Board Exam: All Questions Now Covid-19-Related

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PHILADELPHIA, PA—Recognizing that no other diseases matter anymore, the American Board of Internal Medicine (ABIM) is rewriting its entire 2020 exam so that every...
colonoscopy

New ACS Recommendations for CRC Screening Forces Anesthesia to Bear the Burden of Providing...

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On May 30, 2018, the American Cancer Society announced that it will be updating its colorectal cancer screening guideline such that all adults age...