Internal Medicine

Putin

ABIM Taps Putin to Quash Internal Medicine MOC Revolt

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - The American Board of Internal Medicine (ABIM) President and CEO Dr. Richard Baron introduced his new Maintenance of Certification (MOC) position...

Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...

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LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.”  Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...

Hospital to Open Day Spa in Dialysis and Infusion Unit to Increase Income

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In a bold move announced today, Mt. Saint Elsewhere hospital stated that the dialysis and infusion unit will be offering supplemental packages. “Anything you...

Orthopod Writes a Longer Note Than Hospitalist: Metaphysical Calamity Ensues

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KEARNEY, NE - Fatefully cleaving the time line in two, an orthopedic surgeon at Kind Humanitarian Hospital (KHH) wrote a progress note longer than...
kidney beans

Nephrologist Feels Wrong Eating Bowl Full of Kidney Beans

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TAMPA, FL - Reluctantly bringing the spoon to his mouth after spending a few minutes swirling it in the bowl in front of him,...

“Rare Diseases” Give Jenny McCarthy Lifetime Achievement Award

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Thursday night the 197,788th annual Rare Disease Awards - formally known as the Common Disease Awards - brought the house down at...
Shkreli & Bresch

Breaking: Martin Shkreli & Heather Bresch Are A**holes

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NEW YORK, NY - In a candid interview on CBS News yesterday, Martin Shkreli admitted that "Yes, Heather Bresch and I are a**holes."  Mylan...

Criminals Decry “Cultural Appropriation” by Masked Civilians

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The latest CDC recommendations for all U.S. citizens to wear face masks when in public has created backlash from an unexpected quarter: career criminals. Long...
Black & Blue Friday

ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’

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IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...