Internal Medicine

patient satisfaction scores

After Rapid Response, Hospital Administration Organizes Rapid Satisfaction Team

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Mr. Cheapest Executive Officer at Lord Have Mercy Hospital is one serious CEO who is always concerned about addressing all the whims of the...

Carinii Sues Pneumocystis for Alimony After He Runs Away with His Secretary Jirovecii

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MALIBU, CA – GomerBlog recently came across a public filing Thursday that had shocking implications.  Carinii, long known to be the partner of Pneumocystis,...

Desperate Hospital Endorses Dirty Sock as Preferred PPE

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CHICAGO, IL—As coronavirus counts rise, local hospitals face shortages of personal protective equipment (PPE). With any remaining viable PPE hoarded in the homes of...

Skeleton Started on IV Fluids, Was Bone Dry

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Dr. Shaw just admitted a difficult case at Washington University.  "I just admitted this bag of bones literally 2 hours...
bicarb-only sodium bicarbonate

ICU Team Figures Out What Their Code Needs: More Bicarb!

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - The ICU team at New Orleans Medical Center (NOMC) made history today by becoming the first medical team ever to implement a bicarb-only...
fart, CNN, Anderson Cooper

Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50

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ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...

COVID-19: ER Doc Relieved Man in Room 9 Just Having a Heart Attack

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NEW YORK, NY—Overwhelmed with hordes of COVID-19 patients filling the Emergency Department at Manhattan Medical Center, third-year resident, Dr. Noah Moe Karona, expressed relief...
skinny jeans sepsis

Skinny Jeans Increase Venous Return in Sepsis

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CINCINNATI, OH - A recent study out of Northside, Cincinnati claims all-cause mortality benefit in sepsis with addition of skinny jeans to early goal...
menu book

Book of Delivery Menus Missing, 20 Night Nurses & Doctors Die of Hunger

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AUGUSTA, GA - Medical personnel, patients, and families at Augusta Medical Center (AMC) are in mourning this morning as 20 night nurses and physicians...
P90X Kegel

Product Review: P90X Kegel Edition for Urinary Incontinence

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Pros / Tony Horton's new P90X Kegel program can transform your pelvic floor muscles from flab to fab in just 90 days, curing incontinence...