The Epic EHR Bartender
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Wait until I log on… (30 seconds) Welcome to Hyperspace!
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Pick from this list.
Patron: Hmm…...
Not Impressed: Cards Downgrades A-Fib to B-Minus
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Completely unimpressed by his patient's routine ECG this morning, cardiologist Paul Framingham has formally downgraded the diagnosis from an A-fib to...
Endocrine responds valiantly to Blood Glucose of 201
Local Endocrine fellow and brand-new father, Dr. Patrick Tumble, reports unadulterated joy at getting 3 am phone call regarding a high blood glucose. Dr.Tumble...
New Attending Receives First Paycheck, Transforms into Fully Developed Republican
WATERLOO, IA - Shortly after receiving his first paycheck, Trent Perry, a physician in his first year of practice, finally emerged from his cocoon...
Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...
WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...
Medical Team Confused as Patient Made DNR Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Members of a multidisciplinary inpatient team at Tulane University left a family meeting this morning scratching their heads, as they...
Countdown of the Top 10 Things Found in the Rectum
In a style similar to family feud, we surveyed people who like to shove things in places, and also the surgeons who need to...
NY/NJ Ebola Algorithm for People with Recent Travel to Africa
* We truly appreciate you risking your life to treat dying people... just stay away from us. *
** Free to leave includes taking mass...
DIY Furniture Assembly Stress Test Validated in Landmark Trial
PERTH, WESTERN AUSTRALIA - Researchers at the Outback University Hospital have presented data from their landmark DIY-IKEA trial this week, illustrating the benefit of...
The Difference Between Staff & Staph
Over the past several weeks, Gomerblog has observed an uptick in medical documentation mishaps in which the words “staff” and “Staph” are used incorrectly. ...