New York Outlaws MRSA
ALBANY, NY - New York legislators recently passed a new law that outlaws MRSA (Methicillin-resistant Staph aureus) in the state of New York. This...
Local Physician Brings Daughter to Work, Helps Tell Patients They Are Overweight
HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Chris Zanick, a primary care physician, has been struggling to talk to his patients about being overweight. He solved this...
Peyton Manning No Longer Has The Arm Strength to Deliver Papa John’s Pizzas
DENVER, CO - According to Denver Broncos team doctors, aging 39-year-old quarterback Peyton Manning’s arm strength has significantly diminished to the point where he...
Director of CME Conference in Hawaii Caught Off Guard When Participants Actually Show Up
WAILEA, HI—Jay Morgan, director of a popular annual CME conference in Hawaii, was caught off guard last week when participants actually showed up expecting...
Intern Forgets to Write “Appreciate GI’s Recs” in Patient Note, GI Fellow Inconsolable
BOSTON, MA - In what can only be described as a quagmire of apology emails, face-to-face meetings, and sensitivity seminars, the fallout from Robbie...
Intern honored for shortening length of stay by leaving everyone NPO
Intern Connor was given the distinguished length of stay award by prestigious academic hospital. During his acceptance speech he stated he was not surprised...
Tips: How to Keep Your Necktie Nice & Colonized
So who doesn’t love neckties? Not only do they strangle your windpipe, but they also spread disease with reckless abandon. Cheers to that! Here...
Fentanyl Lollipops Abused, Authorities Perplexed
WASHINGTON, DC - The Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) and the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) are absolutely baffled to hear about recent allegations of...
New Mental Health Hotline Established for CrossFitters and Vegans
Seattle, WA- North Seattle General Hospital held an emergency press conference today to roll out their mental health hotline for CrossFitters and Vegans that...
Med Student Yammering About Oxidative Phosphorylation, Kill Us Now
LAS VEGAS, NV - Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) medical student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones continues to cement her legacy as the most annoying...