Internal Medicine

Proactive Patient Does Own Admission Orders, H&P

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QUEENS, NY - In one of the best examples in recent memory of medical self-ownership, a proactive patient not only sought medical attention but...
superbacteria

Dr. Mark Plaster to Battle New Super Bacteria in Maryland

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ANNAPOLIS, MD - The CDC is warning the public that a new super bacteria has been identified in Maryland that is resistant to every...

Doctors Getting Nursing Degrees to Stay Competitive

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BOSTON, MA - Nurse Shannon Wilkens on floor 4 West thought she saw someone she knew in scrubs walking into room 414.  "He was tall,...
ejection fraction EF 100%

Perfect Score! Patient Has Ejection Fraction of 100%

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SAVANNAH, GA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, patient Edward Jacobs has just aced his cardiac exam, the transthoracic echocardiogram specifically, becoming the first...

New Helmet for Spleen Allows Mononucleosis Patients to Play Contact Sports

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EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Athletes afflicted with infectious mononucleosis, a disease caused by the Epstein-Barr virus and sometimes marked by splenomegaly, will soon be able to...

Interventional Radiology Performs CT-Guided Chart Biopsy

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RICHMOND, VA - History was made yesterday at Richmond Medical Center, as an interventional radiology (IR) team led by Dr. John Johnston-Johnson performed the...

RN Too Terrified of N95 Fit Testing Instructor to Admit Tasting Bitter Spray

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COMMUNITY HOSPITAL - RN Maria did not speak up when her N95 mask didn’t fit properly due to feeling intimidated by her instructor, Cara, thereby...

Major Setback! Scientists Haven’t Worked on Vaccine, Just Been Looking at COVID-19 Memes

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ATLANTA, GA - At the CDC the nation has accumulated the world top-notch scientists to work on a Coronavirus Vaccine. After 2 months of...
hospital employees

Hospital Issues Memorandum Regarding the Revised Policy for Procedure Revisions

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To All Hospital Employees: This memorandum is being issued as notification regarding the revised Policy for Procedure Revisions. The Policy for Procedure Revisions outlines the...
When I was an intern

Breaking News: Internal Medicine Attending is “Old as F**k”

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Gomerblog has been alerted by several concerned nurses and medicine residents to the appearance of an ancient bent-out-of-shape internal medicine attending...