Internal Medicine

surgical management

Ortho Consults Medicine for Surgical Management

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - In an act that most definitely crosses the line, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has consulted Medicine for surgical management of a...

Doctors, Nurses in Disbelief as Even Infants Are Drug-Seeking

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ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, now we’ve seen it all.  GomerBlog is sad to break the unfortunate news that the world is descending into...

U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”

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TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...

Local Physician Brings Daughter to Work, Helps Tell Patients They Are Overweight

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HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Chris Zanick, a primary care physician, has been struggling to talk to his patients about being overweight.  He solved this...
Quaker State Canola Oil

Product Review: Quaker State Ultimate Durability Full Synthetic Canola Oil

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Pros / Quaker State's new product provides excellent protection against the formation of sludge, plaque, and other harmful deposits, improving viscosity in all weather conditions. Cons /...
anti vaccine brain

Mutations in the Anti-Vaxxers’ Brain Discovered

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Scientists have made a major breakthrough in understanding the brain functions of anti-vaccine proponents (anti-vaxxers).  Mutations in the Y74 gene encode for these transformations.  Environmental...
dyspnea

FDA Approves FUROSESONEROLAQUINOX for Undifferentiated Dyspnea

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - To the delight of emergency physicians across the country, the Food and Drug Administration has approved the use of a new drug...

New Helmet for Spleen Allows Mononucleosis Patients to Play Contact Sports

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EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—Athletes afflicted with infectious mononucleosis, a disease caused by the Epstein-Barr virus and sometimes marked by splenomegaly, will soon be able to...
smoking at hospital

Patient with Inhuman Perseverance and Resolve Makes It Outside to Smoke with 50 Pounds...

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COLUMBUS, OH - Last week a patient at University Hospital performed a feat so incredible, so difficult, that she has earned the distinction of...
Methadone drone

Pain Clinic Unveils New ‘Methadrone’ Delivery

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TALLAHASSEE, FL - A new cutting-edge system for delivery of maintenance narcotics was unveiled in the Florida panhandle last month, as Our Lady of the Weeping...