Internal Medicine

Steve Bannon

Surgical Oncologist Successfully Resects Steve Bannon from National Security Council

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - At a press conference at MedStar Georgetown University Hospital early this morning, surgical oncologist Dr. H.R. McMaster was pleased to announce that he...

Black Cloud Begs On-Call Meteorologist for Help

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NEW HAVEN, CT - Finding herself underdressed & underprepared for this torrential downpour of admissions and cross-cover calls, third-year medicine resident and self-diagnosed black...

Dr. Fauci Implores We All Watch Bob Ross on Infinite Loop Immediately

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Addressing a restless and concerned American public over COVID-19, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious...
bartender

The Epic EHR Bartender

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Patron: I’d like a beer. Epic: Wait until I log on… (30 seconds) Welcome to Hyperspace! Patron: I’d like a beer. Epic: Pick from this list. Patron: Hmm…...
vaccines

Jimmy Kimmel and Real Doctors Preach on Getting Vaccines

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Another reason to get your kids vaccinated https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgpfNScEd3M
pediatrics vaccines

Local Children Against Vaccinations Despite the Evidence

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ATLANTA, GA – A growing trend is occurring among children across the nation: the rejection of vaccines.  It has been well documented that some...
ICD-10 codes

ICD-10 Primer, Lesson 5: WTF Codes

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Now that we’re a few lessons in, you must be wondering the same thing: What about those ICD-10 codes that are ludicrous?  Whereas the...
avascular necrosis

Avascular Necrosis Renamed to Slow Chronic Unfixable Bone Atrophy (SCUBA) to Stop Unnecessary STAT...

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BONE ISLAND, FL -  A condition long known by a scary-sounding name has been renamed at the American Society for Surgeons of the Hand...
gauze for abscess

Scented Packing Gauze Makes Abscesses Fresh and Fun

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PROVIDENCE, RI - The field of wound care is taking note of a new line of whimsically-scented wound packing products pioneered by Quintac Hospital. ...