Nostalgic Pharmacists Yearn for Good ‘Ole Days of Illegible Doctors’ Prescriptions
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Though pharmacists appreciate the progress that has been made with electronic health records (EHR) and e-prescriptions over the past two...
Doc McStuffins Forced to Resign Due to Dismal Patient Satisfaction Scores
ORLANDO, FL - Children across America are devastated after news broke today that Doc McStuffins will not be asked back for another season. Disney...
Aliens Postpone Earth Invasion Due to Coronavirus Concerns
INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION - Due to justified concerns about their own immune systems, an alien race has decided to postpone their plans for a...
Study Finds Majority of Americans Would Rather Die of E. coli Than Not Eat...
DENVER, CO – According to a study released last Saturday by University of Colorado sociologist Dr. Prestin Wheats, the majority of Americans are unfazed...
Homeopath to Drug Seeker: ‘I Thought You Said Dilute It’
SEATTLE, WA - Friday, local drug-seeker Garrett Ashton was reportedly shocked to learn that his Dilaudid was not available for pick-up, and in fact,...
Product Review: Quaker State Ultimate Durability Full Synthetic Canola Oil
Pros / Quaker State's new product provides excellent protection against the formation of sludge, plaque, and other harmful deposits, improving viscosity in all weather conditions.
Cons /...
Attending to Attending Conversation Upgraded To Category 5
CHARLESTON, SC - The impending attending to attending conversation scheduled to hit the 6th floor this evening was recently upgraded to Category 5, bringing with...
12 Days of Christmas – Hospital Style
On the first day of Christmas my true love bought for me, a prep with a colonoscopy.
On the second day of Christmas my true...
MRSA Colonizes Mars
In a joint conference, CDC and NASA delivered a striking blow to human ambition and ingenuity, announcing that MRSA has officially colonized Mars. Defeating...