Internal Medicine

chemist

Brilliant Chemist Gives up Dream of Curing Cancer, Focuses Efforts on Inducing 3 ½...

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CAMBRIDGE, MA - Citing practical reasons, 41-year-old renowned chemist and laboratory researcher Charles Kenzington, Ph.D. has formally ended his three-decade quest to discover a...

COVID-19 Update: Palliative Care Makes U.S. DNR

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ATLANTA, GA - Accepting that COVID-19 is progressing despite all of our best efforts, Palliative has been consulted and has officially made the United...
Cheetos

Too Many Cheetos: Patient with Rare Case of Orange Poop

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BOSTON, MA - Bright red blood per rectum suggests active gastrointestinal (GI) bleeding, and black tarry stool suggests a brisk upper GI bleed.  But...

Director of CME Conference in Hawaii Caught Off Guard When Participants Actually Show Up

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WAILEA, HI—Jay Morgan, director of a popular annual CME conference in Hawaii, was caught off guard last week when participants actually showed up expecting...

Endocrine responds valiantly to Blood Glucose of 201

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Local Endocrine fellow and brand-new father, Dr. Patrick Tumble, reports unadulterated joy at getting 3 am phone call regarding a high blood glucose. Dr.Tumble...

BREAKING: Figs Scrubs made DNR by Female DO Hospitalist

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Los Angeles, CA – After gradually wedging their way into the hearts and minds of healthcare professionals across the US and the world, Figs has...

BREAKING: New York City Resident Tests Negative for COVID-19

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“I’ve run 753 tests for COVID-10 this week alone and this man’s test was the first negative I’ve seen. I was nearly certain that everyone in Manhattan had Coronavirus.” Dr. Corbin explained.
medical studnets

New Interns Looming: Hospitals Desperately Race to End Pandemic by July 1st

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WASHINGTON, DC—If you thought the Coronavirus pandemic was bad right now, just wait until July 1st, the date most new medical school graduates begin...
mars

NASA Plans to Build a Skilled Nursing Facility on Mars

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MERRITT ISLAND, FL - Scientists have been planning a human mission to Mars for exploration and habitation for decades.  Successful travel to and habitation of...

WHO: Coronavirus Successfully Contained to Planet Earth

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GENEVA, SWITZERLAND - At a televised press conference this morning, the World Health Organization (WHO) announced that they have successfully contained the deadly virus...