Internal Medicine

brain stem biopsy

Physical Exam Tips: The Nervous System

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The physical exam of the brain and nervous system can be broken down into two parts: the lumbar puncture and everything else. Lumbar Puncture The lumbar...

Patient Still 10/10 Pain Even After a ‘Being-Set-On-Fire’ Analogy

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NEWARK, NJ - Patient Deborah Skemp woke up today at 6:30 a.m. during rounds by her physician Dr. Waters.  He asked her the usual morning...

Antibiotic Combination Pill Approved for All Pediatric Infections

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WASHINGTON, DC - Vancolinezodoxycillimyciflagylnox, brand named "Cureall," a combination pill developed by Amalgamated Pharmaceuticals containing all known oral antibiotics, was approved yesterday for pediatric infections...

Friday Afternoon Clinic Patient Surprisingly Sent to the Emergency Department

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – The emergency department at Queen’s Hospital had a very rare event occur this Friday afternoon.  74-year-old Wilma Gooding, checked into the emergency...
hospital ceo salary

Doctors and Nurses Fight Back: Proposal to Link Hospital CEO Salaries to Employee Satisfaction...

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CHICAGO, IL – State senators in Illinois voted yesterday 45 to 14 in favor of a new proposal put together by physicians, nurses, and other...
resistant bacteria

Carbapenem-Resistant Enterobacteriacae Strain Develops Resistance To Bullets, Fire

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Public health officials are warning of the emergence of a new strain of bacteria demonstrating an unusual resistance pattern.  The warning...
cbc

CBC To Be Replaced By Cheaper Incomplete Blood Count

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NASHVILLE, TN - Looking to save a few dollars here and there in order to hire more hospital administrators, leadership at Nashville Medical Center (NMC) will...
ridiculously restrictive transfusion

Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death

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BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have...

This Store Provides Real Allergies to Get the Medication you Want

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BEVERLY HILLS, CA — Natalie Speede-Faster really needed to get back on Adderall.  Her stupid internist was “concerned” because Natalie always wanted a higher...
septic colonized keyboard

Saint Mary Hospital’s EMR Offers 2 New Discharge Disposition Options: Heaven or Hell

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BETHLEHEM, PA—Following the lead of religiously-affiliated hospitals around the country, St. Mary Hospital recently updated their electronic medical record/order entry system to include two...