Traffic Not Only Causes Stress, It Causes Syphilis Too
STUCK IN THE MIDDLE LANE (STILL), INTERSTATE 85 SOUTH, ATLANTA, GA - Traffic jams are modern transit’s strokes. At rush hour or any hour in...
Surgeon General to Reverse Opioid Epidemic with Whopping Dose of Narcan
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Acting Surgeon General Sylvia Trent-Adams has unveiled a new strategy against the nation's opioid epidemic, and it simply involves giving the...
New Incentivized Spirometers to Pay $50 Per Deep Breath
ATLANTA, GA – In an effort to better encourage patients to do their breathing exercises, a newly-designed incentivized spirometer will pay patients $50 per...
Mystery of Appendix Solved: A Private Space for Horny Bacteria to “Get It On”
INSIDE YOUR APPENDIX—Admit it, when you place your stethoscope (that is, if you even own one) on a patient’s abdomen, you don’t really keep...
Surgeon General Consults Hospitalist General for Medical Management
WASHINGTON, DC - In breaking news, Gomerblog has received word today that the Surgeon General of the United States Vivek Murthy has consulted the...
Woman Fakes Heart Attack to Make Flight Land at Her Real Destination
GUNNISON, CO - A woman who couldn’t find a direct flight from Los Angeles to Gunnison, Colorado bought a ticket to Kansas City, Missouri instead....
20 Out of 10 Medical Providers Annoyed by Patients’ Misuse of Pain Scales
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study by the Centers for Pain Control & Other Nonsense (CPCON), a whopping 20 out of 10...
Call Room Bears Striking Resemblance to Medieval Dungeon
DALLAS, TX - Third-year surgical resident Stacy Collins was shocked when she opened the door to her call room and found its striking resemblance...
Local Hospital To Pilot Drive-Thru Intubation Clinic In Response to COVID-19 Spread
GREENEVILLE, TN - St. Indignant’s Health Care System has announced a new partnership with the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services to pilot...
Hospital Replaces Crash Carts with Snack Carts
MARIETTA, GA – Goodbye defibrillators and hello Swedish Fish! In a rare display of unity, hospital administrators and health care personnel at Marietta Medical...