Internal Medicine

gluten allergy

After Binging on Pizza and Beer, Local Man Claims to Have Gluten Allergy

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BERKELEY, CA – Local resident Charles Longfellow is no stranger to beer.  “A typical weekend I’ll go through a couple cases,” he told reporters...
daughter to hospital day

Hospital’s ‘Take Your Daughter to Work’ Day Not Such a Good Idea

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Hepatobiliary surgeon Dr. Jeanne Devereux was disappointed.  "How hard could it be?!" she fumed.  "Just hold the damn retractor and...

UPenn Med School Retires Dr. Oz’s White Coat

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PHILADELPHIA, PA—In a move that most have hailed as long overdue, the Perelman School of Medicine at the University of Pennsylvania (UPenn) finally honored...

Medical Meth to Increase Tax, Dental Revenue

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JAY, FL - Not since legalized marijuana increased Colorado's Revenues and Frito Lay's profits, has a drug’s side effects so quickly boosted another profession’s revenue....
oxidative phosphorylation

Med Student Yammering About Oxidative Phosphorylation, Kill Us Now

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LAS VEGAS, NV - Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) medical student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones continues to cement her legacy as the most annoying...
Barolo tap

Intern Fails at Champagne Tap, More Like Barolo Tap

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ATLANTA, GA - Internal medicine intern Timothy McDuffy's quest to perform a lumbar puncture (LP) in which there are zero RBCs in the first...
hungry patient

Patient “Starving to Death” After 1 Hour NPO, Actually Starves to Death Another Hour...

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NASHVILLE, TN - At midnight, patient Eric Stephens was made "NPO after midnight."  After one hour, patient complained to his nurses and physicians, stating...

Eastern Medicine Inspired Stroke Protocol Saves Millions in Health Care Costs, Improves Patient Satisfaction...

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PORTLAND, OR - A cerebral vascular accident, commonly known as a stroke, is a devastating diagnosis that frequently results in long-term disability and death.  Many...
map my couch app

Map My Couch App Released in Response to Map My Run App

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In response to the numerous Map My Run and other workout posts that inundate newsfeeds on Facebook, a psychology group out of Houston TX...

Doctors shocked to discover patient with low pain tolerance

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Dr. John Payne, an orthopaedist at the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia just announced a shocking discovery he made yesterday, while in...