Study: Physical & Chemical Restraints Can Effectively Supplement Lack of Self Restraint
CHICAGO, IL - A five patient case series out of Northwestern University recently evaluated the utility of using physical and/or chemical restraints to supplement...
Revolutionary New Antibiotic Has No Drug Interactions
The pharmaceutical company PharmaWow has just released its latest drug, an antibiotic which they claim will not interact with anything.
In response to the growing...
Ronaldo, Neymar Admit Magic Soccer Sprays Contain Dilaudid
CHICAGO, IL - Two of the world's best soccer players, Cristiano Ronaldo and Neymar, have told Gomerblog the secret ingredient that makes those magic...
Night Shift Enjoys New Ventilator Mode
GOLETA, CA - Puritan Bennett's new ventilator mode is a hit with the Bay Harbor Hospital night shift. Along with the standard AC, SIMV,...
Texas Ebola Doctor: ‘Nurse, I’ll Be Right Behind You’
DALLAS, TX - Reports are coming in that during the care of the Liberian Ebola victim, the lead physician told his nurse: "Let's go into...
Hospitalist Hopes Stethoscope Fairy Leaves Money Under Pillow
ATLANTA, GA - Thinking he might get a fiver for it, hospitalist Jeff Rodgers placed his broken stethoscope under the pillow before going to...
Cancer Drug Delayed 2 Years Due to Licensing Deal
Boston, MA – Astra-Nomical has delayed their wonder cancer drug, Fizamax (ferazepatab), again. This time up to 2 years because of promotional disputes.
“We were...
PlayStation 3 to Unveil ‘Colonoscopy’ Video Game
SAN MATEO, CA – PlayStation developers plan to release the highly anticipated Colonoscopy 2016 video game to the public soon, with 2,000 special orders already...
ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’
IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...
Breaking: Tilt Table All Crooked & Sh*t
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news to Gomerblog, hospitalists, cardiologists, and neurologists at Emory Healthcare have come to a rare consensus, agreeing this tilt...