It’s About Time: Trojan’s New Bulletproof Condoms to Protect Against STIs, Terrorists
NEW YORK, NY - Focusing 2017 research and development dollars on the final sentence of their tagline "Trojan. Pleasure you want. Protection You Trust.," Trojan...
Contrary to Consultant’s Advice, Doctor is Now Hesitant to Call Back with Any Questions
AUSTIN, TX - After admitting a patient with end-stage congestive heart failure, third-year internal medicine resident Amanda Cummings consulted the cardiology service to help...
Local Centenarian Attributes Longevity to Drinking, Sex, Survivorship Bias
Lenny Jones, a retired pipe fitter and Navy veteran celebrated his 102nd birthday at the Greenwood Hills nursing home on Tuesday.
When asked about the...
Internist Trampled to Death by Herd of Wild Zebras
ST. LOUIS, MO - Sad news today as a local internal medicine physician was trampled to death by a herd of wild zebras while...
Dr. Fauci Implores We All Watch Bob Ross on Infinite Loop Immediately
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Addressing a restless and concerned American public over COVID-19, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious...
New Vaccination Campaign Seeks to Eradicate Anti-Vax Movement by 2030
WASHINGTON, DC—Jenny McCarthy, once famous for a spread of nude photos in Playboy and now for causing the spread of measles in the US,...
EM Intern Kicked Out Of Residency For Completing Full Work-Up Of Patient Before Consulting...
“We absolutely will not tolerate this kind of behavior,” the irate Department of Emergency Medicine chairman began. “This isn’t like the old days when...
Hospital Having Difficulty in Training New Employee, ‘Mr. Dracula’
NEW BEDFORD, CT – Merryview Community Hospital recently hired a local man named “Mr. Dracula” as a phlebotomist for their laboratory division and their decision...
The American Medical Association’s New Guidelines for Treating Millennials
Though medicine continues to advance with new technologies and innovations, one invaluable tool has withstood the test of time: the medical interview. The medical...
Area Doctor Obtains ‘DNR’ Tattoos At Every Central Venous Access Point After Stint at...
BOCA RATON, FL - After briefly working at a rehab facility, traumatized area physician Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram rushed to a local tattoo parlor to have "DNR"...