Internal Medicine

DNR

Medical Team Confused as Patient Made DNR Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Members of a multidisciplinary inpatient team at Tulane University left a family meeting this morning scratching their heads, as they...

‘I Can’t Afford These $4 Meds!’ Says Patient with iPhone 6s Plus (Gold) &...

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ATHENS, GA - “I can’t afford these meds!” hospitalized patient Jason Redmond told his medical team, as he folded closed his 13-inch MacBook Air.  Redmond...

WHO: Coronavirus Successfully Contained to Planet Earth

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GENEVA, SWITZERLAND - At a televised press conference this morning, the World Health Organization (WHO) announced that they have successfully contained the deadly virus...
whole milk

Milk Fat Prolongs Survival of Government Dietary Recommendations

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With the recent release from NSA data-mining archives proving that whole milk is indeed better than skim milk for cardiovascular health, dieticians throughout the...
doctor on computer

Alternate Co-Signatures When Supervising Residents

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So there you are, reading your resident's notes and you have to write the co-signatures.  I know what you're thinking: it's so BORING!  It's...

Aliens Postpone Earth Invasion Due to Coronavirus Concerns

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INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION - Due to justified concerns about their own immune systems, an alien race has decided to postpone their plans for a...
chapped lips hot mess express

All Aboard! Next Stop on the Hot Mess Express: ICU City!

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ER STATION - All aboard! Health care professionals, have your tickets and IDs in hand as you get ready to step aboard the...
shoulder pain

A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain

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Hello, and good afternoon to you.  Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or...
Martin Shkreli

Things You Should Know About Martin Shkreli

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CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals Martin Shkreli raised the price of Daraprim, a drug used in the treatment of toxoplasmosis, from $13.50 to $750 per...