Internal Medicine

hand washing

Researchers: If Washing Hands Won’t Remove All Germs, Blowing Them Off at High Speeds...

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CAMBRIDGE, MA – Researchers from Harvard University have discovered the reason for high-cost hand dryers in bathrooms all over the United States.  In public...

An Internist’s Guide to the Description of Rashes

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Dermatologic conditions and rashes can be hard to describe.  Don't have time to refresh on those terms?  Don't you fret!  Rather than ask a...
skinny jeans sepsis

Skinny Jeans Increase Venous Return in Sepsis

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CINCINNATI, OH - A recent study out of Northside, Cincinnati claims all-cause mortality benefit in sepsis with addition of skinny jeans to early goal...
empathy medical robot

Hospital to Employ Empathy Robots to Allow Nurses and Doctors to Chart

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Tired of being treated like a number at big hospitals?  Mercy Hospital in San Francisco wants to change that and they...

Lion King Remake to Include Mufasa’s Prolonged ICU Admission and Futile Care Prior to...

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ANAHEIM, CA - Disney studios has announced that the remake of the Lion King, slated to be released in mid-2019, will feature a more...

Fashion Police: Hospital Edition Weighs in on Fanny Packs

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In the most recent installment of Fashion Police: Hospital Edition, host Kathy Griffin along with commentators Giuliana Rancic, Kelly Osbourne, and special guest Jennifer...
surgeon tired fusion

Practice Management Breakthrough: Hospitalist to Direct Admit Self to Own Service

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SALEM, MA - A major breakthrough is heralded today in the field of hospital medicine that promises to solve the eternal problem of provider...

Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs

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CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year...
hospital ward

Medical School Revamps Admission Interviews to Mimic Day on Internal Medicine Rotation

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN - After an onslaught of honest evaluations about several rotations from outgoing 4th years, a local medical school admissions committee decided to...

Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced

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BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...