Amazing Survival Story: Patient Lives by Pressing Call Light 46 Times in a One...
AUSTIN, TX - 56-year-old patient, Andrew Whitestack, is being credited with saving his own life by pushing the nursing call light button 46 times in one hour. Consultants and attorneys reviewing his case have...
Voluven to Make Comeback as an Axillary Roll
NEWCASTLE, AUSTRALIA - The end seemed nigh for Voluven. The volume expander has been on the ropes after large clinical trials demonstrated increased risks of acute kidney injury and need for dialysis following its...
Sleeping Beauty Wakes Up After Single Dose of Narcan
MEDIEVAL ENGLAND - In a last ditch effort to prevent intubation for airway protection, Sleeping Beauty - also known as Princess Aurora, the daughter of King Stefan and Queen Leah - was given 0.4 mg...
Newborn Nursery’s Infant Capacity Increases 50% by Hiring Former Tetris Champion
ATLANTA, GA – The Newborn Nursery at Swedish Covenant Hospital has seen a dramatic increase in their patient capacity after hiring a former Tetris champion to maximize placement of babies. Stephen Glasgow, who from...
Patient Admitted with Life-Threatening Butthurt Exacerbation
CHICAGO, IL - "Move people, this guy's crashing!" EMTs yelled, asking everyone to get out of their way as they aggressively carried 33-year-old Alexander Touchy-Feely into one of the trauma rooms so treatment could...
So You’ve Been Hit by a Stray Dart, What to Do Next
It happens all the time. You're hanging out at a bar or friend's house playing a game of darts, when - BAM!! - a dart hits you in the neck. The adrenaline rush and...
Patient Admitted with Facebook Overdose
INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Alice Wilkinson was admitted last night after she was found down by her roommate, convulsing next to her smartphone. Her roommate, who wishes to remain anonymous (Kate Townsend), called 911 and...
