Fourth-Year Medical School Rotations, Here’s the Gouge
As third-year medical students begin to think about scheduling for next year, they must carefully consider how to arrange their final, and arguably most important, year of medical education.
“This is the year right before...
Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death
BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have predicted, a ridiculously restrictive transfusion strategy (hemoglobin threshold <...
Calling Pathologists Multiple Times Does Not Expedite Reports, Study Finds
CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA – A new study sponsored by the College of American Pathologists concluded that there is an inverse correlation between the number of times a physician calls a pathologist and the time it...
New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings
ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings. “We’ve known for years that these malignancies were locally aggressive,” says lead...
TSA to Start Screening for Colorectal Cancer at Airports
ATLANTA, GA – U.S. government officials said on Thursday that they would start screening patients for unintentional weight loss and bloody stools, starting with Hartsfield-Jackson International (ATL) airport this coming weekend, in an effort...
Medical Specialties as Game of Thrones Characters
As all medical specialties try to gain control of the hospital, we've narrowed down who their characters are:
Cardiology, you poor tortured soul with a horrible life. Let's be honest, you got yourself into this.
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Nurses Have Stethoscopes: What Do You Think?
The philosophical TV show, The View, recently discussed the recent Miss America pageant. Two of the hosts were very critical of Miss Colorado with comments such as: Why is she wearing a "nurse's uniform?"...
Outdoor Blood Bank Stand Offers Fresh-Squeezed Frozen Plasma
KNOXVILLE, TN - In the hopes of luring more patients, Knoxville General Hospital has setup an outdoor blood bank stand boasting that their frozen plasma is not only fresh but fresh-squeezed too. And...
Pathologist Performing Autopsy Requests More Tissue
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Internal medicine resident, Dr. Cynthia Talbot, was surprised to receive a call from pathology about her patient. It had only been three months since she had requested an autopsy, surely they...
Surgeon Summons the Dark Lord Xepneumotep to Scrub In
CHANCELOR, NC - Dr. Mathers, a surgical oncologist, decided to take on a pancreatic cancer patient whose cancer had engulfed a large portion of the liver. This particular surgery is one of the most difficult procedures...