Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death
BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have predicted, a ridiculously restrictive transfusion strategy (hemoglobin threshold <...
Physicians Hold Drexit Vote, Doctors Exit Medicine
KANSAS CITY, KS - A large, synchronous exhale was heard this morning as the results of Drexit, or Doctors Exiting Medicine, came in. Millions of doctors around the country voted to leave medicine this Saturday....
Hospitals Now Joining Black Friday Frenzy
NEW YORK, NY - Black Friday is hitting America very soon. Stores are now opening their doors almost immediately after millions of Americans finish off eating their pies on Thanksgiving Day where only the chosen are able...
Here We Go Again, Pathology Was Left Out of Another Article
GOMERBLOG HQ - Whoops. We really screwed up this time: Pathology was left out of another Gomerblog article. To be specific, THIS ARTICLE. We sat down to report on pathology and just forgot about...
Research Indicates All Bleeding Stops Eventually
BETHESDA, MD - According to sources at the NIH, yes, it is true: all bleeding stops. This insight came to much relief of general surgery intern, Mercedes Bagger, who provided first-hand testimonial to this truth last...
Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies
ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency." They are coming off of their latest controversy where a flight attendant wouldn't believe a female African-American...
Pathology and Radiology Reports Recommend Correlation with Each Other, Endless Loop Ensues
BOSTON, MA – The ICU team of a local area hospital had struggled for days with an increasingly slow EMR for one particular patient.
“At first I thought it was just temporary, but it just...
Frustrated with Memes, Pathologist Intubates Crashing Covid Patient
We are providing continuing coverage from the BestEver Hospital as the aftermath of this morning’s events unfolds.
“Alright, sure, yeah that might have been how it went down,” said Dr. P. Rone, a first-year Pulmonary...
TSA to Start Screening for Colorectal Cancer at Airports
ATLANTA, GA – U.S. government officials said on Thursday that they would start screening patients for unintentional weight loss and bloody stools, starting with Hartsfield-Jackson International (ATL) airport this coming weekend, in an effort...