CDC Guidelines Using Pathologists as Model for ‘Extreme Social Distancing’
ATLANTA, GA - With point of care testing for SARS-CoV-2 drastically lagging behind patient demand, experts at the CDC are urging the public to help...
Pathologists Suffer Third Degree Sun Burns in Hospital Fire Drill
DALLAS, TX - A routine fire drill at Big Tex Hospital took a turn for the worst, authorities report.
At 11:58 AM, the Big Tex Office...
Frustrated with Memes, Pathologist Intubates Crashing Covid Patient
We are providing continuing coverage from the BestEver Hospital as the aftermath of this morning’s events unfolds.
“Alright, sure, yeah that might have been how...
Conspiracy! Powerful Microscope Finds “Made in China” Imprinted on Virus
ATLANTA, GA—Staring for hours at the 500,000x-magnified image of the novel coronavirus under his electron microscope, Dr. Henry Thomson of the CDC just could...
Here We Go Again, Pathology Was Left Out of Another Article
GOMERBLOG HQ - Whoops. We really screwed up this time: Pathology was left out of another Gomerblog article. To be specific, THIS ARTICLE. We...
FDA Approves Groundbreaking Postmortem Chemotherapy Protocol
BOCA RATON, FL - Sending shockwaves throughout the medical community, the Food & Drug Administration approved a postmortem chemotherapy regimen to be administered after...
Hospital Morgue Morning Rounds Initiated After Family Insists Patient “is a Fighter”
CODVILLE, CT — Following a 211-day stay at St. Rodger’s Medical Center ICU, including two weeks of uninterrupted asystolic cardiac arrest, patient Joseph Smith,...
Orthopedic Surgeon Celebrates Transfusing Patient to 100% Hematocrit
DENVER, CO - Ortho spine surgeon Brik Bowers recently set the all-time record by transfusing his post-op patient to a hematocrit of 100%. Bowers...
Hospitals Now Joining Black Friday Frenzy
NEW YORK, NY - Black Friday is hitting America very soon. Stores are now opening their doors almost immediately after millions of Americans finish off eating...
What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 2
This is a continuation from our first post: What "Thank You for the Interesting Consult" Really Means, Part 1. Let’s go!
Nutrition
Translation: Like it or...