Thursday, June 24, 2021


Surgeon Summons the Dark Lord Xepneumotep to Scrub In

CHANCELOR, NC - Dr. Mathers, a surgical oncologist, decided to take on a pancreatic cancer patient whose cancer had engulfed a large portion of the liver.  This particular surgery is one of the most difficult procedures...

Resident Fails Rotation for Forgetting to Place TPN Orders by 10 AM

MIAMI, FL - Mercy Hospital made a decision to fail Dr. Andy Oppenheimer yesterday after he once again forgot to put total parenteral nutrition (TPN) orders in by 10 AM.  The parenteral nutrition patients on his...

Pathologists Criticized for Having High Proportion of Terminally-Ill, Cancer-Diagnosed, and Deceased Patients

CHICAGO,  IL - As greater attention is drawn to patient outcome and patient satisfaction, new specialty specific data has revealed that pathologist’s patients are more likely to die, have cancer, or already be dead. ...

ED Consults Pathology on Acute Abdomen Just to “Make Them Aware”

SANTE FE, NM - Emergency Medicine attending physician, Dr. Edith Lin, believes in a proactive and multidisciplinary approach to patient management.  When a 46-year-old woman with sixteen hours of sharp right upper quadrant abdominal pain,...
lab tests

Local Woman: ‘I Need All My Labs Drawn’

EAST LANSING, MI – Local patient Sheryl Harris came to clinic today with a chief complaint of "I need all my labs drawn." When questioned what specific labs she was referring to, she responded, "All...
doctor updating

What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 2

This is a continuation from our first post: What "Thank You for the Interesting Consult" Really Means, Part 1.  Let’s go! Nutrition Translation: Like it or not, I’m recommending a multivitamin. OB/GYN Translation: Not another pelvic exam for...

Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs

CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year he would donate "most of his vital organs to people...

Pathology Duty Pager Goes Off Overnight

SAN DIEGO, CA - In a rare, unexpected occurrence, the pathology duty pager went off at 11 p.m. last night, disturbing the quiet slumber of a third-year pathology resident.  "I had no idea what was...

Surgeon Sends Lunch for Frozen Section

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - After visiting the hospital's cafeteria, Dr. Jason Greene seated himself in the surgery staff lounge to enjoy his lunch.  But a few bites into his meal, something didn't seem right. "I ordered...
food buffet

Pathologists Running Out of Food (Terms)

SEATTLE, WA - At the national meeting for pathologists, a packed, plenary session on the impending crisis of pathologic terms was held. For years now, pathologists have known that they are running out of food...