ATLANTA, GA – Area radiologist Michael Feuerstein admits that he loves hedges beyond comprehension. “I love my wife, I love my kids, and I love my home, but nothing makes me happier than when I get to tend to my hedges, you know, hedging,” explained Feuerstein, wearing a big smile along with his gray apron. “I mean, don’t these hedges look great? Who cares what you think, I think they look great. And that’s all that matters. People can look at my hedges and think whatever they want. The other neighborhood radiologists are jealous. Their hedges just don’t strike that perfect balance of precision and ambiguity. If you ask me, I’m a master hedger.” Gomerblog asked his next door neighbor, general surgeon Melissa Johnson-White, what she thought. Her response was blunt: “Tell him to stop hedging, we’re sick and tired of it. F**k his hedges! And definitely tell him to stop telling us to clinically correlate too.”
