Internal Medicine

pilot cleared landing

Pilot Consults Medicine, Asks if Plane Cleared for Landing

DELTA 240 - Just as he started his descent into Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport after a long transatlantic flight, Captain Jack Wilson asked if "Medicine was on the plane" and if so "was the plane cleared...

Mayo Secretly Celebrates new #1 Status after Cleveland Clinic Comes out Anti-Vax

Rochester, MN - The Mayo Clinic recently held a campus wide party this weekend full of "Number 1" balloons and cakes that said "Mayo #1". These were held after Cleveland Clinic promoted Anti-Vaccination, or...
shoulder pain

A Cardiologist Explains: Shoulder Pain

Hello, and good afternoon to you.  Of course, I know it must be the afternoon because I don't see patients in the morning or evening or weekend anymore. At any rate, I shall discuss with...
frog, tadpole

Man with Frog in Throat Also Has Tadpoles in Scrotum

HICKORY, NC - Jerry Thompson has been dealing with a hoarse voice over the past week, something not uncommon as temperatures cool with the approach of winter.  He felt it lingered a little too...
Bell Biv Devoe Poison

Toxicologist Bell Biv DeVoe Confirms: “That Girl is Poison”

BOSTON, MA - After "sensing something strange in my mind" for a few days now, Boston emergency physician and toxiciologist Dr. Bell Biv DeVoe has officially confirmed with Gomerblog that the "situation is serious" and...
hospitalist place

Hospitalists Aim to Place All Americans by 2020

PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Society of Hospital Medicine (SHM) has announced a new multibillion-dollar PBP initiative, which stands for "Place, Baby, Place!", with the ultimate goal of placing all 300 million Americans in nursing...
doc hunt

Video Game Review: Doc(ument) Hunt

Pros / Doc(ument) Hunt is a fun follow-up to Nintendo's Duck Hunt that allows medical providers to channel their rage against paperwork by shooting up flying charts. Cons / The fun wears off quickly as you're overwhelmed...
bedside komodo dragon

PT Recommends Bedside Commode, Bedside Komodo Dragon

MARIETTA, GA - Physical Therapy has just left recommendations for hospitalist David Walker regarding their mutual patient 50-year-old Gina Welch, who was admitted for pneumonia, stating that she is "safe for discharge home" but recommends...

So You’ve Been Hit by a Stray Dart, What to Do Next

It happens all the time.  You're hanging out at a bar or friend's house playing a game of darts, when - BAM!! - a dart hits you in the neck.  The adrenaline rush and...

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