Pharmacy

crocodile moat

Red Line in Medication Room Replaced with Crocodile-Filled Moat

BOSTON, MA - Any nurse who has dispensed medications knows the ubiquitous red line, in the medication room, near the Pyxis machine.  This is a barrier of safety; step across the threshold for a distraction...

Kentucky Derby, Tired of His Pathetic 2 Minute Performance, Busted for Viagra Use

Louisville, KY—Weary of being referred to as “the most exciting 2 minutes in sports,” the Kentucky Derby was busted this week for attempting to use Viagra to enhance performance. Officials at the Derby grew...
homeopathy

Homeopathic Drug Rep No More Effective Than Placebo, New Study Finds

A new study published by the University of South Pennington shows that Homeopathic drug reps are no more effective at convincing homeopaths to use certain brand-name homeopathic products than a placebo pill. “Quite frankly, the...
pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to “That One That Starts with a...

WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with a D.”  The move comes about as lawmakers attempt to...
sodium tricarbonate tricarb

Woohoo!! Scientists Discover Sodium Tricarb!!

BETHESDA, MD - Look out, everyone, things just got real exciting!  Scientists have made a discovery that is sure to change the face of medicine from this moment forward.  Just when the world couldn't handle...
Pfizer box of medications

Pfizer Releases Box of Assorted Medications for Valentine’s Day

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Pharmaceutical giant Pfizer has announced plans to release a limited-edition box of assorted medications in time for Valentine’s Day.  The box consists of a wide variety of Pfizer’s most popular...

Most Popular Medical Questions of 2016 by State

2016 is complete, and we combed through the data at Google to find out what were the most popular medical questions asked by state (click the map to enlarge): What is New England's obsession with...

Report: Patient Taking a Few Blue Pills, Two Pink Ones Here and There, &...

ATLANTA, GA - Presenting to her local emergency room with lightheadedness, headache, and fatigue, 72-year-old Molly Medds is perplexed by questions about her current medications.  “Isn’t it all in the computer?” she asks, while searching...
Medical center

Medicine Changed Forever After Dr. Google Granted Prescriptive Authority

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Medicine will be changed forever after yesterday's ruling allowing online medical symptom checker sites, including Dr. Google, to prescribe medications. "We plan to cut out the middle doctor in medicine, that being...
epipen price increase

EpiPen Users Develop Shock Over EpiPen Prices: Treatment, More EpiPens

WASHINGTON, DC - Numerous cases of EpiPen Price Gouging Shock (EPGS) are sweeping the nation after EpiPen prices continue to be hiked up by pharmaceutical company Mylan.  Prices for this life saving delivery device...

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