Primary Care

Mayo Secretly Celebrates New #1 Status After Cleveland Clinic Comes Out Anti-Vax

ROCHESTER, MN - The Mayo Clinic recently held a campus-wide party this weekend full of "Number 1" balloons and cakes that said "Mayo #1".  These were held after Cleveland Clinic promoted anti-vaccination (or anti-vax)....
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful resuscitate a CPR dummy (or CPR manikin) back to human life....
mips

A Hospital Administrator Explains: MIPS

Hey everybody!  Are you having a good day?  I hope so.  How about this fantastic weather we're having?  Awesome, hey let’s talk about the cool new Merit-Based Incentive Payment System (MIPS)!  This thing is...
confused patient

Patient Still Concerned About Getting Sick from the Flu Shot

MADISON, WI - Doreen Knowitall was horrified that her primary care physician again offered her a flu shot “Even though I told her I didn’t want it last year!  I can’t believe she thinks...
ventilator

2016 Updated Laws of the House of God

If you haven't read The House of God yet and you are in medicine, stop reading our blog and go read it.  It really should be a prerequisite to medical school.  If you have...

Best Placenta Smoothie Recipe: Afterbirth Bliss

As the debate rages on regarding health benefits versus hazards of placentophagia, there is no arguing that everyone loves a delicious smoothie.  So the Gomerblog team sampled hundreds of placenta recipes, regurgitating less than...

CDC Warns Man Buns Harbor Zika Virus

ATLANTA, GA - The Center for Disease Control has issued a very clear warning: Do not date or interact with any men with man buns because they harbor the lethal Zika virus. Above all,...
pumpkin spice

Hospitals Now Offering Seasonal Pumpkin-Spiced Patient Satisfaction Surveys

BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators at Madre De Díos Medical Center will now offer seasonal pumpkin-spiced patient satisfaction surveys in order to improve survey response rates.  "We are so excited to give a...
hospital buffet

Profits Soar After Area Hospital Opens ‘All You Can Eat/Shoot Narcotics Buffet’

In response to poor HCHAPS scores and declining revenue, St John’s in the Valley has become the first hospital in the nation to trial a revolutionary concept in healthcare, the "All You Can Eat/Shoot...

Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies

ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency."  They are coming off of their latest controversy where a flight attendant wouldn't believe a female African-American...

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