Anesthesiologists Compare Arm Tans While Surgeon Repairs Penetrating Aortic Injury
ATLANTA, GA – As local trauma surgeon Dr. Andre Mackersie desperately tried to gain control of a massively exsanguinating abdominal aortic gunshot wound, the anesthesiologists on the other side of the sterile drape were...
With First Date Going Badly, ICU Fellow Tries Albumin
SAN FRANCISCO, CA – With his date clearly not enjoying herself and losing interest in him at a rapid rate, local ICU fellow Dr. Jeff Riggs quickly sprung into action and administered 500 cc...
ASA Updates Algorithm to Account for Redheads
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) released new guidelines that update their infamous ASA classification system to account for the anesthetic considerations of a patient with "red hair." "We experience vast...
Anesthesiologists Cannot Find Reason to Cancel Case Right Before Shift Change
SPOKANE, WA – In a stunning development, believed to be the first of its kind here at Southern Spokane University Hospital, a patient is currently being brought into the OR without a single word...
Developing: Patient Professes “Deep Hatred of Needles”
RENO, NV - GomerBlog was first on the scene at a preoperative holding bay outside of the main OR, where a patient about to undergo surgery made a fascinating proclamation. GomerBlog was investigating a recent...
PACU Institutes ‘No Repeat’ Policy
CREST BUTTE, MT - The policy review committee at Nondenominational Faith Memorial Medical Center has instituted a “No Repeat” policy in their Post Anesthesia Care Unit (PACU). The chairperson of the committee says that this...
Local Man Relieved He Was Able to Yell at His Surgeon Just Before Going...
HERSHEY, PA – Early reports are coming in that local man, Frank Demmer, chewed out his surgeon in pre-operative bay five. "I’m just happy I was able to yell at him before I went...
Breaking News: Anesthesiologist Manages to Place EKG Leads Out of Surgical Field
LOUISIANA - GomerBlog is excited to bring you breaking news that is just being reported from Memorial Hospital in operating room 4. An anesthesiologist, who we can’t confirm the name as of yet so we will just...
Shark Attack Victim Denied Narcotics
PENSACOLA BEACH, FL - Skip Sanders alternated between spearfishing and surfing, depending on the waves. Yesterday, an errant harpoon from his spear gun grazed a bull shark.
Chomping ensued.
Despite the loss of all four limbs, Skip managed...
