Tuesday, May 18, 2021

Anesthesiology

anesthesia resident

Anesthesia Resident Finishes Reading Entire Internet During Free Flap Surgery

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NEW YORK, NY – John Silk, a fourth-year anesthesiology resident at State Medical Hospital in New York, will now have his name immortalized in the annals of technological achievement with greats such as Bill...
anesthesia patient

PACU Institutes ‘No Repeat’ Policy

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CREST BUTTE, MT - The policy review committee at Nondenominational Faith Memorial Medical Center has instituted a “No Repeat” policy in their Post Anesthesia Care Unit (PACU).  The chairperson of the committee says that this...
routine ECG

Breaking News: Anesthesiologist Manages to Place EKG Leads Out of Surgical Field

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LOUISIANA - GomerBlog is excited to bring you breaking news that is just being reported from Memorial Hospital in operating room 4.  An anesthesiologist, who we can’t confirm the name as of yet so we will just...

Anesthesiologist Tired of Being Called ‘Anesthesia,’ Decides to Talk in 3rd Person with British...

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BOULDER, CO - Dr. Shelly Druben, a practicing anesthesiologist, is tired of being called "anesthesia" by her coworkers in the operating room. "All the nurses and operating room staff know the surgeon's name and always say Dr....
blood

Patient Bleeds to Death, Blood Bank Paperwork Completed Without Errors

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MADISON, WI - GomerBlog regrettable reports about another surgical patient bleeding to death at Community Hospital yesterday.  84-year-old Terrance Billingsworth tragically passed away in the operating room while undergoing an abdominal aneurysm repair. “Blood started pouring out everywhere,”...

Local Hospital Pleased to Offer Natural Surgery

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VASHON ISLAND, WA - A growing number of Americans are attracted to natural and alternative remedies, whether it be Echinacea for colds, shark cartilage for chemotherapy, or giving birth squatting in a tranquil forest pond far...
joint commission

Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...

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EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections.  For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or previously called JACHO, but don't EVER call them that now...
Sudoku

Anesthesiologist Calls for STAT Sudoku Help in OR 3

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PHOENIX, AZ – St. Joe’s Outpatient Surgery Center’s anesthesiologist Dr. James Robinson was twenty-two minutes into performing anesthesia on a 31-year-old ASA 1 for a knee scope, when he suddenly needed help.  “Right away...

With First Date Going Badly, ICU Fellow Tries Albumin

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – With his date clearly not enjoying herself and losing interest in him at a rapid rate, local ICU fellow Dr. Jeff Riggs quickly sprung into action and administered 500 cc...