Anesthesiology

wallet aorta

Cardiothoracic Surgeon Hoping He Didn’t Leave Wallet in Guy’s Aorta

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NEW YORK, NY - As cardiothoracic surgeon Timothy Carter sews his patient's sternum closed after successful repair of an ascending aortic aneurysm, he can't help...
Sleeping Beauty

Sleeping Beauty Wakes Up After Single Dose of Narcan

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MEDIEVAL ENGLAND - In a last ditch effort to prevent intubation for airway protection, Sleeping Beauty - also known as Princess Aurora, the daughter of...
DJ

Outpatient Surgery Center Hires DJs Instead of OR Nurses

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IBIZA, SPAIN - The party is just getting started at Ibiza Surgical Specialists, a private outpatient surgery center, now that new OR nurses have...
chocolate

Pyxis Stocked with Chocolate to Meet Anesthesia Department Needs

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A recent pharmacy audit of the anesthesia department led to a change in pyxis inventory. “We thought going through the anesthesia cart drawers would...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

COVID-19: Anesthesia Amazed They Haven’t Been Blamed for Any of This

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SCHAUMBURG, IL - Pandemic coronavirus, COVID-19. Hundreds of thousands infected. Sports suspended. Nations on lockdown. Social distancing. Markets crashing....
Smug Anesthesiologist blames everybody

Anesthesiologist Correctly Identifies Anatomic Structure During Surgery

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SPRINGVILLE, VA – Local part-time anesthesiologist and full-time crossword puzzle enthusiast Arnold Preston, M.D. shocked the entire operating suite today when he correctly identified...
Big Bad Wolf

Wolf Huffs and He Puffs and He Blows Anesthesia’s Drapes Down

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LONDON, ENGLAND - A confrontation has broken out between the Big Bad Wolf and anesthesiologist James Halliwell in OR 5 of London Bridge Medical...

Shark Attack Victim Denied Narcotics

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PENSACOLA BEACH, FL - Skip Sanders alternated between spearfishing and surfing, depending on the waves.  Yesterday, an errant harpoon from his spear gun grazed...

Medical Professions as NFL Teams

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Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.   Orthopaedics are the...

Spare Anesthesia Machine Makes Slushies

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SANTE FE, NM - Dr. Brad Jacks suspected it for months.  Anesthesia personnel would leave for a break in the middle of a quick ear...