Anesthesiology

nephrology

Always Blame Nephrology

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Intern: Patient’s BP is now 90/50. Resident: This is from pulling too much fluid with dialysis Intern: Patient didn’t get any dialysis today Resident: Then, it is...
incentive spirometer incentivized spirometer

New Incentivized Spirometers to Pay $50 Per Deep Breath

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ATLANTA, GA – In an effort to better encourage patients to do their breathing exercises, a newly-designed incentivized spirometer will pay patients $50 per...

Woman Enjoys “Natural Birth,” Streams Over FaceTime

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HIGHLAND PARK, OH – Janet Freech, a 38-year-old parturient, wrote in her birth plan that her goal was to deliver "completely natural."  In the plan she specifically refused all...
surgeons

American College of Surgeons to Publish New “Because I Said So” or BISS-Based Medicine...

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WASHINGTON, DC - A press release today from the American College of Surgeons stated, “After years of putting up with the satanic nonsense known...
anesthesia patient

National Security of Anesthesiologists Releases New Cell Phone Disabling Device

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RESTON, VA - The National Security of Anesthesiologists (NSA), in response to a jury awarding a patient $500,000 after an anesthesiologist was caught on...

Surgeon Passes Out Following OR Fentanyl Exposure, Remainder of OR Staff Unaffected

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BOSTON, MA – 94 minutes into what was a routine total knee arthroplasty, Dr. James Nairbear suddenly felt lightheaded and fell backwards landing in...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Breaking: CMS Creates New Blame Anesthesia ICD-10 Codes

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) & National Center of Health Statistics (HCHS) have created a new set of...

Surgeon General: Attorney General’s Progress Note Copied Directly from H&P

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Surgeon General Jerome Adams released his opinion in a press statement that Attorney General William Barr “simply copied relevant portions of...
couple kissing

Worst Pick-Up Lines by Medical Subspecialty

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GomerBlog did some research on a hot and steamy topic: What are the worst pick-up lines by subspecialty?  Here goes! Allergy “I like it when you...

With First Date Going Badly, ICU Fellow Tries Albumin

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – With his date clearly not enjoying herself and losing interest in him at a rapid rate, local ICU fellow Dr....