Anesthesiology

IV catheter

Anesthesiologist Ecstatic to Get 2 AM Call to Place IV, and Again at 3...

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MEMPHIS, TN - Dr. Beverly Mascinoni, the on-call anesthesiologist last night, was ecstatic to get a call at 2 AM to place an IV. ...
shag OR

Operating Room from the 70s Shutting Down, ‘Difficult to Clean’

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NEW YORK, NY – Disco isn’t dead, yet.  One of the last remaining icons of the great disco movement in NYC still remains in...

Dr. Clinton Gets Away with Wearing Pantsuit in OR

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - A shocking story coming from Bethesda Medical Center, where Hillary Clinton has been wearing a pantsuit in the operating room.  She refuses...

Surgeon General: Attorney General’s Progress Note Copied Directly from H&P

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Surgeon General Jerome Adams released his opinion in a press statement that Attorney General William Barr “simply copied relevant portions of...
anesthesiologists tone

Rectal Tone of Anesthesiologists Varies with Patients’ Oxygen Saturation

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BERLIN, GERMANY - A new and controversial study out of the esteemed Higginstein Community Surgery Center describes a curious phenomenon regarding rectal tone of anesthesiologists...
surgeon general

Anesthesiologist General Won’t Stop Asking President How Much Time He Has Left

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Trump is growing impatient with the new Anesthesiologist General continually asking him how much time is left in his presidency. Surgeon/Anesthesiologist General...
Hospicillin

FDA Approves Hospicillin for Use in Patients Who are Full Code

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Today the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) approved a powerful new palliative care medication called Hospicillin for use in patients who...

Female Doctors Now Required to Show ID During Flight Emergencies

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ATLANTA, GA - Delta Airlines announced that "all female physicians will need to show identification during an in-flight emergency."  They are coming off of...
anesthesiologist

Anesthesia Accepts Blame for Everything Wrong in Universe, Life As We Know It

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SCHAUMBURG, IL - In breaking news just in to Gomerblog today, the American Society of Anesthesiologists (ASA) has formally announced it will finally accept blame for...