Anesthesiology

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Anesthesia Resident Falls Asleep During Case, Reprimanded For Missing Lunch Break

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CHICAGO, IL - Chaos ensued at a Chicago hospital last week when an anesthesia resident was missing from the surgical lounge.  Around 10 a.m.,...

Anesthesiologists Now Required by Law to Scratch Itching Surgeons During Operations

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BOCA RATON, FL - The longstanding practice of anesthesiologists having to scratch surgeons in the operating room has now become codified into law.  Effective next...
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Warren Beatty, La La Land Blame Oscar Best Picture Mix-Up on Anesthesia

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HOLLYWOOD, CA - In a stunning and unprecedented finish to the Oscars last night, presenters Warren Beatty and Faye Dunaway had announced "La La Land"...
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Study Finds Needle Anxiety Worsens with Tattoos

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BALTIMORE, MD - Johns Hopkins researchers published a shocking new study in this month's New England Journal of Medicine showing a correlation between the...
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Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot to Craft the Perfect Ham and Cheese Sandwich

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CLEVELAND, OH - After finishing up his cases for the day, an oncological surgeon brought sandwich supplies with him to a vacant operating room...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

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Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...

Phillips to Introduce Monitor that Only Alarms

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DALLAS, TX - Today Phillips unveiled their mew monitor: Alarmtron 3000.  This new monitor is the next step in evolution from the previous generation...
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Trump: Anesthesiology Will Build Border Drape Wall & Pay for It

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Publicly acknowledging that efforts to build a border wall and have Mexico pay for it has failed, President Donald Trump has...
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Texas Execution Delayed Due to Inmate’s NPO Status

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DALLAS, TX – For the third time this week a Texas execution was canceled due to the prison inmate #474901’s NPO status.  "Someone’s got...

Breaking News: Surgery Accepts Blame

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For the first time in recorded history, anesthesia blamed surgery for a poor case, and surgery accepted blame. “We took this guy back for a...