ACGME burnout enemy-to-enemy

ACGME Limits Resident Work Hours to 168 Per Week

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CHICAGO, IL - In an effort to increase resident satisfaction and curb the current epidemic of burnout in health care professionals, the Accreditation Council...
brown nose metastasizes

Med Student’s Brown Nose Metastasizes to Liver, Lungs

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CHICAGO, IL - Despite the repeated warnings from numerous residents and attendings to alter the trajectory of his health and well-being, the brown nose of 26-year-old...
pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...
heartbeat pulse

Med Student Figures Out Heart Rate: Count Beats in a Day, Divide by 24...

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CHARLESTON, SC - In a classic case of medical student inefficiency, fourth year Tommy Reinhardt has informed his medicine team that he plans on calculating...
acute on chronic placement placement exacerbation

Patient Admitted for Placement Exacerbation

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Gomerblog has learned 88-year-old patient Betty Waltuck was readmitted last night by the Emergency Department (ED) at Tulane Medical Center...
Da Vinci

Da Vinci Recruited by Megatron to Destroy Optimus Prime

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CYBERTRON - In unsettling news today, Da Vinci continues to pursue his dastardly ways by joining forces with the Decepticons.  Citing neglect on behalf on...
ophthalmology

Precious Ophthalmologist Tries to Help During Code

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PITTSBURGH, PA – Arriving to the surgical ICU with his little box full of eye equipment, precious ophthalmologist Thomas Finkle reportedly tried to help...
constipation

Joint Commission Creates New ‘Primary Constipation Center’ Certification

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - On Monday, the Joint Commission unveiled its new certification aimed at the rapid treatment of constipation. "Constipation affects nearly 4 million...
Grand Rounds

Breaking: Grand Rounds Not Particularly Grand Today

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Earlier this morning vascular surgeon Dr. Emma Wexler gave Grand Rounds to her fellow colleagues at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center.  Unfortunately...