Dr. Oz & Joy Behar Birth Devil Offspring, Hell is Near
THE NINTH CIRCLE, HELL - In a frightening development, it has been reported that Dr. Oz & Joy Behar, two of television’s most reviled...
Hospitals Unleash New, Brutally Honest Slogans
NEW YORK, NY - Forget the days of the compassionate and uplifting slogans like “A Passion for Healing,” “Because Your Life Matters,” or “Every...
Breaking: CDC Warns of Cooties Outbreak in Children
ATLANTA, GA - Parents pay close attention: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a new warning to the American public against...
Placenta Throw to Replace Discus at Rio Olympics
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL - The International Olympic Committee (IOC) has voted unanimously to replace Track & Field's Discus event with the Placenta Throw...
Physician Signs Out Patient Census and Pager, Has Slight Orgasm
ORLANDO, FL - After having one of the toughest weeks in her professional career as a hospitalist during which she had a census of...
Search & Rescue Team Saves Anesthesiologist Buried Under Drape Avalanche
DALLAS, TX - Search and rescue operations are underway to locate anesthesiologist Kelly Doolittle in operating room (OR) 5 at Dallas Medical Center after...
Neck Fusion Gone Awry: Carried Away, Neurosurgeon Fuses All 206 Bones
NASHVILLE, TN - Admitting enthusiasm got the best of her, Vanderbilt neurosurgeon Dr. Elle Hardwire got carried away with an anterior cervical discectomy and...
Top 10 Reasons United is Forcibly Dragging Doctors Off Planes
THE INTERNET - United Airlines has come under fire after video surfaced of a doctor being dragged off a plane due to the airline overbooking...
Intern Forgets to Write “Appreciate GI’s Recs” in Patient Note, GI Fellow Inconsolable
BOSTON, MA - In what can only be described as a quagmire of apology emails, face-to-face meetings, and sensitivity seminars, the fallout from Robbie...