Dr. Fauci Implores We All Watch Bob Ross on Infinite Loop Immediately
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Addressing a restless and concerned American public over COVID-19, Dr. Anthony Fauci, Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID), recommends we all start watching Bob Ross painting...
CDC Recommends Washing Hands for 30 Minutes Before, After Each Patient Encounter
ATLANTA, GA - Stating that health care professionals can do more to prevent the spread of germs, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) recommends that health care professionals wash their hands for...
Hospice Agencies Pioneering a Different Approach to the Decidedly Unglamorous Process of Dying
“Our clients customize their own End of Living Plans down to the finest details,” mused company spokesperson Delilah Banerjee. “Their final months, days, and even minutes are occasions to express themselves. You only die...
ID Doc Sends ‘Thank You’ Cards for Those Interesting Consults
NEW HAVEN, CT - Taking consultative manners into another echelon, a Yale infectious diseases doctor is sending "Thank You" cards to show her appreciation for anyone who reached out to her with an interesting...
Desperate Officials Offer Deal to Twentysomethings: If You Wear a Mask, You Can Ditch...
BEAR, DE—In an admirable attempt to incentivize mask-wearing amongst America’s twentysomethings, who are thought to be driving the summer resurgence of Covid-19 due to a callous disregard for CDC recommendations, health officials have offered...