Internal Medicine

CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus

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ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...

Nursing Student Enters OR Without Shoe Covers: Beatings Commence

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WARWICK, RI - The student nurse stared nervously at the blood-red line bisecting the hallway.  Scrub hat and surgical mask, check.  Full breakfast and...

Traffic Not Only Causes Stress, It Causes Syphilis Too

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STUCK IN THE MIDDLE LANE (STILL), INTERSTATE 85 SOUTH, ATLANTA, GA - Traffic jams are modern transit’s strokes.  At rush hour or any hour in...

Judge: No Conflict of Interest for Cardiology Practice to Own Fast Food Franchises

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5th circuit court appellate judge, Courtney Mills, ruled in favor of Riverside Cardiology Associates, PC in the case of Delaney at el vs Riverside...

Local Man Cures Diabetes After He Refuses His Insulin

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SEATTLE, WA – After years of obesity, a high calorie diet and limited exercise Mr. Krendall presented to his local ED after feeling, “crappy”...

Brave Patient Speaks Up About Lower Back Pain

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LOS GATOS, CA – Mrs. Ann Oyin is a 82-year-old librarian who presented to her PCP for a cold that wasn’t getting any better....
opioid use

American Academy of Drug Seekers Releases 2016 ED Pain Management Guidelines

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BALTIMORE, MD - Acknowledging that the nationwide effort to reduce opiate abuse in the ED has led to dangerous levels of undertreatment among their...

Tips: How to Keep Your Necktie Nice & Colonized‏

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So who doesn’t love neckties?  Not only do they strangle your windpipe, but they also spread disease with reckless abandon.  Cheers to that!  Here...
cpr

Heroic Hospital Administrator Rushes To Dying Patient To Complete Core Measures

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BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators across the country are recognizing the heroic efforts of Chlöe Less, Assistant Director of Quality Control at Madre...

Psychic Hired to Read Patients’ Minds, Doctor Visit Time Reduced

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BATON ROUGE, LA -- Do you think doctors ask weird questions—like “Do you have any problems with your kidneys?” Or ones that are hard...