Local Resident Physician Found in Respiratory Therapist Car’s Trunk

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GLENDALE, AZ – Resident physician, Dr. Chad Rogers, was finally found after a 2-day manhunt.  His wife states that he went to work 8 days ago...
perplexed doctor

Intern Determined Not to Have Medical Decision-Making Capacity

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ANN ARBOR, MI - For several days medical intern Brent Hammock appeared very confused.  He had lucid moments now and again, but he was...
boxing gloves

Bickering Chiefs of Medicine & Surgery Sent to the Principal’s Office, Yet Again

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BOSTON, MA - In developing news at Boston Health & Science University, 51-year-old Chief of Medicine Kyle Jones and 53-year-old Chief of Surgery Maya...
Enema

The Tale of the Enema and the Trailing Zero Error

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LUBBOCK, TX - The Institute of Medicine in 1999 shocked the world when they reported that up to 100,00 persons die each year due...

ACGME Now Restricting Patient Hours, Cites Long Stays Not Helping Residents Learn

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CHICAGO, IL – ACGME released recommendations yesterday that inpatients now have a hospital hour restriction.  “We thought it was about time to limit the...
medical student adorbs CAGE questionnaire infectious enthusiasm

Adorbs! Med Student Thinks CAGE Questionnaire Has to Do with Pets

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MIAMI, FL - Today during bedside rounds first-year medical student Eric Smiley was asked what he could tell the team about the CAGE questionnaire. ...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC: The Adjective of Pus is ‘Purulent,’ Not ‘P**sy’

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ATLANTA, GA - Yesterday, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued an important reminder to healthcare providers today, reminding them once and...

Ask a Surgical Intern, Part 2

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He's back!  The Surgical Intern is answering the mailbag once more.  Let's begin! Dear Surgical Intern, I've been having this kind of crampy pain on...
Snorlax, Pokémon

Pokémon Go Update: Snorlax Found Down, Intubated

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ATLANTA, GA - Anesthesiologist and Pokémon Go addict Tobey Matthews was using augmented reality to explore life on the other side of the anesthesiology...
angry surgeon

New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings

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ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings.  “We’ve known...