Residents No Longer Matched According to Last Name/Specialty Pun
The National Residency Match Program (NRMP) is planning a small update in their mystical computer algorithms which will erase one of US healthcare's greatest...
Ode to the Death of the Physical Exam
Here ye, here ye
On this day we take the time to remember
The loss of a fond friend,
The physical exam
Gone are the days
Of the bedside...
Study: Doctors Can’t Operate an IV Infusion Pump Even If Life Depended On It
BALDWIN, NY - A new study in the New England Journal of Alaris (NEJA) confirmed something we knew all along: doctors can't operate an IV...
Surgeon Caught Screaming at Nobody, Claims “Practice”
BOISE, ID - In a bizarre incident last Thursday, Dr. Nikki Ivanovich, a general surgeon at St. Luke’s Hospital was caught by staff screaming...
Fecal Transplant Donations Skyrocket Thanks to Terrified Day 1 Interns
COLUMBUS, OH - One local hospital’s fecal transplant donation bank is filled to the brim thanks to the groundswell of newly-minted interns on their first...
New Study: Clinical Decision-Making Impaired After 30-Hour Calls Based on Post-Call Spikes in Texts...
ANN ARBOR, MI - The past few years have witnessed several efforts to categorically study the effects of extended calls on residents’ satisfaction, performance, and...
As Nurse Leans In for a Listen, Patient Can Think of No Better Time...
BOSTON, MA - As Nurse Ned Franks leans in with a stethoscope to listen, patient Andy Charles can think of no better time today than right...
Another Doctor is Paged to Death
NEW YORK, NY - New York Medical Center (NYMC) is in mourning as they learned of the death of beloved internal medicine physician Amy...
Intern Tries to Palpate Pedal Pulses, Can’t Locate Legs
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Beads of sweat were trickling down the intern's face. He was determined. He could do this.
It had been over five minutes...
Tips for New Interns: How to Curl into the Fetal Position
We can certainly feel for all those interns starting this month: their minds are spinning and their cardiac rhythms are just shy of V-tach....