tuck patient

Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home

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PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...
caps lock

NURSE SUSPENDED FOR WRITING NOTES IN CAPS LOCK

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NORFOLK, VA - NURSE AMANDA HAN WAS SUSPENDED EARLY THIS MORNING BY HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATION FOR THE SAME OFFENSE YET AGAIN: ALWAYS WRITING HER NOTES...
CRNA taking a break

CRNA Sets Record by Taking a Break While On Break

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BALTIMORE, MD - Nurse anesthetist Megan Poole, a veteran CRNA at Johns Hopkins University, set a new record on Tuesday morning by taking a break...

Med Student Performs History & Physical on Broken Fax Machine

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ATLANTA, GA - It was an unusually slow day and second-year medical student Bryan Orlando bugged his inpatient medicine team for a new patient...

Residents Dismiss Report They Rarely Wash White Coats: “We Don’t Wash Our Regular Clothes...

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HYGIENE, CO—According to a recent study, doctors rarely, if ever, launder their white lab coats, a nauseating fact given that these coats carry and...
medical white coat

Resident’s White Coat Shortened in New Public Shaming Tactic

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HOUSTON, TX - In an imaginative new tactic to publicly shame his residents, orthopedic surgeon Dr. Scott Winslow has started reducing the length of his...
annoyed doctor stage 4 decubitus ulcer

Attending Does NOT Agree with Intern’s Plan as Noted Above

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AUBURN, AL - “This is absolute horsesh*t,” said family medicine attending Renata Bellows, as she read over her intern’s progress note.  “This is terrible....
N95 99 negative AFB sputums

Doc Takes Chance on Ill-Fitting Small N95 Mask Since Finding Regular One Requires Effort

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - After briefly weighing the risks and benefits of using an ill-fitting small N95 mask that's already there versus trying to search...

Residents No Longer Matched According to Last Name/Specialty Pun

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The National Residency Match Program (NRMP) is planning a small update in their mystical computer algorithms which will erase one of US healthcare's greatest...
porn

Med Students Not Actually Working, Just Looking at Porn

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NEW YORK, NY - Though medical students Matthew Roberts, Erin Long, Lauren McCarty look like they are studying or sifting through a patient's electronic...