excited medical students

Year-End Bonuses to be Paid Entirely in Educational Experience

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Tampa, FL - For hospital CEO John Stevens, 2018 was a great year. Profits reached an all time high, and his board members had...
angry surgeon

New Study Characterizes Metastatic Potential of Malignant Attendings

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ROCHESTER, NY - Results of a new study have been released which describe for the first time the metastatic potential of malignant attendings.  “We’ve known...
black cloud white cloud

Meteorologists Developing Radars to Detect Black Clouds, White Clouds

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ATLANTA, GA - In a new strategic partnership with Emory University, meteorologists at The Weather Channel (TWC) has pledged to push the boundaries of...
herd of zebras

Internist Trampled to Death by Herd of Wild Zebras

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Sad news today as a local internal medicine physician was trampled to death by a herd of wild zebras while...

Ask a Drug Seeker

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Dear Drug Seeker, I’m really concerned about the Zika virus and the Summer Olympics going on as scheduled. Do you think this is a good...

Intern Accused of Being a Poster Whore

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OMAHA, NE - Ellis Simmons, intern in the Medicine-Pediatrics (Med-Peds) program, was discovered to be propositioning several pediatric hospitalists to work with him on...
despacito

‘Despacito’ Doubles Spanish Vocabulary for Non-Spanish-Speaking Health Care Staff

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Health care staff across the country are praising the song “Despacito,” Justin Bieber’s hit collaboration with Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee, for enhancing interactions...
intern physician worth it

“Miracle Cure” for Peripheral Vascular Disease Discovered at Major Academic Center by Medical Intern

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The campus is aflutter with excitement as Dr. H. Simpson, preliminary medical intern extraordinaire, has found the cure for the incurable.  No one in...
em entrance

Frequent Fliers Hired to Evaluate Emergency Medicine Residents

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ST. PAUL, MN - Responding to feedback that existing resident assessments were not properly evaluating the attendings of tomorrow in how they adapt to important...