opthalmologist

Ophthalmology Resident Consulted to Put Glasses On

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Rapidly responding to his third page for acute onset vision loss from the ED, third year ophthalmology resident Dr Wobleski stepped into the eye...

Area LEGO Man Admitted with Bright Red Blocks Per Rectum

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LEGOLAND, FL - An area LEGO man is in serious condition at LEGOLAND Medical Center after he presented to the emergency department (ED) with...

Intern Excited to Take Care of Cobra Kai, Because They Never Die

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SAN DIEGO, CA - Herb Swanson has started his internship year off on a bad foot.  "I had 3 patients die on me in...
psychiatry resident

Due to Late Consult, Psychiatrist Leaves Hospital After 3 PM

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Psychiatry resident Dr. David Smith left the hospital around 3:30pm today, after arriving at about 11 am.  At press time Dr. Smith could not...

How to F***ing Shine on the Wards: A Med Student Guide to Getting Honors

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We all want that coveted “H.” Here’s how to be a star on the wards: 1. On the first day of rotation, don’t forget the...
pneumothorax

July Intern Really Excited to Cause His Very First Pneumothorax

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ATLANTA, GA - Sometimes getting thrown into the fire is the best way to learn.  At least that's what July intern Timothy McDuffy thinks....
breakfast

Survey Finds This Year’s Residents Not Down for Breakfast

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ATLANTA, GA - Almost halfway into their intern year, survey statistics are showing a troubling trend. This year’s new residents are not down for...
Scrubs

Body Image Issues Linked to Color-Coded Hospital Scrubs Size

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PALO ALTO, CA - Scrubs are fairly shapeless.  If you can discern shapes, the wearer is likely pregnant or wearing the wrong size.  The ultimate...
Seven Blunders

New battery-free pager powered by residents’ sweat and tears.

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In a seemingly limitless display of fiscal ingenuity, hospital administrators have invented a battery-free pager. Administrators have long lamented the hundreds of dollars wasted...
em entrance

Frequent Fliers Hired to Evaluate Emergency Medicine Residents

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ST. PAUL, MN - Responding to feedback that existing resident assessments were not properly evaluating the attendings of tomorrow in how they adapt to important...