Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50
ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...
Surgical Residency Shut Down for Possible Human Trafficking
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The General Surgery Residency of a prominent university in California is currently under federal investigation following allegations of possible human trafficking...
Psychiatry Residents Estimate that 30% of Consults are for Comatose Patients
Dr. Charles Willis scowls at his beeping pager for interrupting his lunch break. “Christ almighty, I can’t sit down for a couple hours without...
AAP Announces New Screening Tool for Resident Developmental Delays
OKLAHOMA CITY, OK – American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has responded to a request from the American Medical Association (AMA) and constructed a new screening...
The Joint Commission Now Encourages Coffee At Nursing Stations, Mortality Rates Plummet
The Joint Commission (JC) has abruptly reversed their ban on caffeinated drinks at physician and nursing workstations in light of new evidence that caffeine...
Residents No Longer Matched According to Last Name/Specialty Pun
The National Residency Match Program (NRMP) is planning a small update in their mystical computer algorithms which will erase one of US healthcare's greatest...
July Intern Really Excited to Cause His Very First Pneumothorax
ATLANTA, GA - Sometimes getting thrown into the fire is the best way to learn. At least that's what July intern Timothy McDuffy thinks....
Medical Student Mob Tears Down Statue of Andrew Wakefield
CLEVELAND, OH - An angry mob of medical students tore down a statue of Andrew Wakefield in front of the Cleveland Clinic Saturday. This...
Intern Determined Not to Have Medical Decision-Making Capacity
ANN ARBOR, MI - For several days medical intern Brent Hammock appeared very confused. He had lucid moments now and again, but he was...
Fecal Transplant Donations Skyrocket Thanks to Terrified Day 1 Interns
COLUMBUS, OH - One local hospital’s fecal transplant donation bank is filled to the brim thanks to the groundswell of newly-minted interns on their first...