Fecal Transplant Donations Skyrocket Thanks to Terrified Day 1 Interns
COLUMBUS, OH - One local hospital’s fecal transplant donation bank is filled to the brim thanks to the groundswell of newly-minted interns on their first...
I Wish My Pager Had Less Irritating Sounds, Like Fork on Chalkboard & Midnight...
In medical school, I found this ugly, indurated, black mass along my right lower quadrant, towards my inguinal crease. It wasn’t tender per se,...
Next-Generation Robotic Simulation Patients to Contain Real Humans
After years of experience building advanced robotic simulation patients, The SimCenter of America design team thinks they’ve reached another technological breakthrough.
“Basically, we found that...
The Tale of the Enema and the Trailing Zero Error
LUBBOCK, TX - The Institute of Medicine in 1999 shocked the world when they reported that up to 100,00 persons die each year due...
Medical Student Forgoes Last Year, Jumps to Residency Draft Early
In an unprecedented move, John Cummings held a press conference in the student lounge to announce his decision to forgo the last year of...
Intern Excited to Take Care of Cobra Kai, Because They Never Die
SAN DIEGO, CA - Herb Swanson has started his internship year off on a bad foot. "I had 3 patients die on me in...
Program Director Announces Fair Wage for Residents… HAHA! Just Kidding!
The director of a well-regarded residency program created a stir this morning when he announced a significant wage increase for trainees. In an email...
Surgical Resident Delivers Mid-Case, Stays to Close
MASS. GENERAL HOSPITAL - Dr. Hannah Richards, a 3rd year surgical resident, was 39+0 weeks pregnant going into Thursday. She scrubbed into Dr. Alexander's hemicolectomy...
What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 1
Initial consult notes usually end with the following line: Thank you for the interesting consult. What does that really mean? In the first of...
Intern Accused of Being a Poster Whore
OMAHA, NE - Ellis Simmons, intern in the Medicine-Pediatrics (Med-Peds) program, was discovered to be propositioning several pediatric hospitalists to work with him on...