Breaking: Resident Answers ‘Yes’ When Third-Year Medical Student Asks if They Can Help With...
CHICAGO, IL – It was approximately 4:15 PM last Tuesday when Clark Gunnerson, a 3rd year medical student on his pediatrics rotation, uttered the universal...
Adorbs! Med Student Thinks CAGE Questionnaire Has to Do with Pets
MIAMI, FL - Today during bedside rounds first-year medical student Eric Smiley was asked what he could tell the team about the CAGE questionnaire. ...
Report: Nurse’s Candy Drawer, Only Chocolate Laffy Taffy and Dum Dums Left
CARDIAC FLOOR - Reports around the hospital are the nurse’s candy drawer on the cardiac floor has run cold.
"You mean to tell me I started...
Not Quite: Intern Claims Champagne Tap After Sticking Bottle of Moët & Chandon
BOSTON, MA - An intern’s initial excitement was quickly reeled in after his team pointed out that sticking a spinal needle through cork of...
STAT Officially Means “Maybe”
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
Whoops! Sleepy On-Call Resident Checked on Crashing Patient in Her Dream
SLEEPY HOLLOW, NY—Amidst a barrage of serious allegations from hospital staff that, during a recent overnight on-call shift, she neglected a nurse’s request to...
Residents Dismiss Report They Rarely Wash White Coats: “We Don’t Wash Our Regular Clothes...
HYGIENE, CO—According to a recent study, doctors rarely, if ever, launder their white lab coats, a nauseating fact given that these coats carry and...
Lame PCP Doctor Hasn’t Even Tried PCP
MADISON, WI - Quick! Hide your beer, get the Visine, because it's time to meet Dr. Dud. Well, her real name is Dr. Amy...
FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
CDC: The Adjective of Pus is ‘Purulent,’ Not ‘P**sy’
ATLANTA, GA - Yesterday, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued an important reminder to healthcare providers today, reminding them once and...