Study: People Named Willie, Dick & Johnson at Higher Risk for UTIs
NEW ORLEANS, LA - A study coming out of the University of New Orleans has found that people with names such as Willie, Dick,...
Local Resident Physician Found in Respiratory Therapist Car’s Trunk
GLENDALE, AZ – Resident physician, Dr. Chad Rogers, was finally found after a 2-day manhunt. His wife states that he went to work 8 days ago...
Contrary to Consultant’s Advice, Doctor is Now Hesitant to Call Back with Any Questions
AUSTIN, TX - After admitting a patient with end-stage congestive heart failure, third-year internal medicine resident Amanda Cummings consulted the cardiology service to help...
Here We Go Again, Pathology Was Left Out of Another Article
GOMERBLOG HQ - Whoops. We really screwed up this time: Pathology was left out of another Gomerblog article. To be specific, THIS ARTICLE. We...
Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...
Medical Student Forgoes Last Year, Jumps to Residency Draft Early
In an unprecedented move, John Cummings held a press conference in the student lounge to announce his decision to forgo the last year of...
Teaching Team Consults Magic 8-Ball for Assistance
NEW YORK, NY - "Will my patient need placement?" intern Jamie Dreessen asked the Magic 8-Ball, shaking it solidly for 15-seconds before placing it on...
Long White Coats to be Officially Replaced By Black Fleece Jackets
CHICAGO, IL - The long white coat has long been a symbol of a young doctor’s achievement in completing medical school and entering residency....
ACGME Approves New Consultology Fellowship
Chicago, I.L. In this long-due announcement, the ACGME has approved a new Consultology Fellowship. While Consultology has been informally practiced by hospitalists for several...
Hospital Quarantine Ended After Horrifying Smell from Post-Call Resident Deemed ‘Non-Toxic’
FAR ROCKAWAY, NY - A 24-hour quarantine of 18 medical students and 15 interns was called off after CDC officials confirmed that the fumes...