Fortune Cookies Replace Lotto Numbers with Vital Signs

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BROOKLYN, NY - In an effort to appeal to health care professionals who order Chinese food for take out because the cafeteria is closed, fortune...
post call resident

Hospital Quarantine Ended After Horrifying Smell from Post-Call Resident Deemed ‘Non-Toxic’

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FAR ROCKAWAY, NY - A 24-hour quarantine of 18 medical students and 15 interns was called off after CDC officials confirmed that the fumes...
CrossSh*t

Meet CrossSh*t, The High-Intensity Bowel Program

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SANTA CRUZ, CA - The founders of CrossFit Greg Glassman and Lauren Jenai have announced the creation of a new strength and conditioning program to...

Female Surgery Resident Reliant on VA Harassment for Affirmation

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LOCAL VA HOSPITAL - In what has been deemed a natural progression of surgical training, local resident Sara Lowell now counts on her interactions with patient...

Resident Submits Her GomerBlog Publications with Fellowship Application, Harvard Impressed

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BOSTON, MA - Dr. Anna Yongap opened a new era in graduate medical education when she listed all 13 of her published GomerBlog articles...
eyeball retina

Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia

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MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years.  Surprisingly, that fear is the fear...

COVID-19: ACGME Redeploys Interns to Check on Healthcare Workers’ Parents

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CHICAGO, IL - The Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education (ACGME) announced that interns will no longer see patients not only to preserve personal...

Medical Student Mob Tears Down Statue of Andrew Wakefield

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CLEVELAND, OH - An angry mob of medical students tore down a statue of Andrew Wakefield in front of the Cleveland Clinic Saturday.  This...
Turlaudidryl, BDT

Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...

Med Student Performs History & Physical on Broken Fax Machine

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ATLANTA, GA - It was an unusually slow day and second-year medical student Bryan Orlando bugged his inpatient medicine team for a new patient...