• 119
    Shares

MODESTO, CA – A sperm bank in Modesto has confirmed what millions suspected.

vaderlab2
Luke(s) I am your father

Before he was Darth Vader, the leader of the dark side, Anakin was trying to pay his way through Jedi school.

“He stumbled into our facility late one night as we were putting up the going out of business signs,” a representative at the Death Star Sperm Bank told GomerBlog.  “At first we weren’t too sure it was going to work, I mean a plan to pay him for each donation?  But he put a double guarantee on his work, so we gave it a shot.”

Within weeks the Death Star received a flock of women whom wanted sons.  Nine months later, thousands more from all around the galaxy came barging through their doors demanding they too get their hands on this Luke man sauce.

The women had to sign a contract guaranteeing their son would be named Luke.  The going rate for Anakin’s baby batter doubled that of a normal donor and it’s been rumored to sell for more than quadruple on the black market.

After the movement gained popularity, Anakin quickly changed his name and went into full hiding in hopes that none of his sons would find him.  Due to the shock on his system, he was treated for PTSD using a one phrase coping strategy that his psychologist, Dr. E. Palpatine suggested.

When GomerBlog reached out to Mr. Vader for comment we received a short message: “Luke(s), I am your father.”

  • 119
    Shares
internballhorts
Unavailable for comment due to strenuous hours of fetching water and pens, ensuring the coffee is hot, and examining the occasional cadaver; it is rumored that writing for Gomer may be the closest internballhorts will ever be to practicing medicine.
WordPress › Error

There has been a critical error on this website.

Learn more about troubleshooting WordPress.