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pilot med student turbulence

Radiologist Responds to In-Flight Emergency, Hedges, Asks Pilot to Clinically Correlate

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ATLANTIC OCEAN - On a flight from Boca Raton to New York City, Air Trump One (Donald Trump's private jet) reported a medical emergency...
Bill Belichick

New England Journal Replaces Logo with Pic of Bill Belichick

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BOSTON, MA - While Atlanta blames anesthesia for the Falcons' epic second-half collapse in Super Bowl LI, Boston continues to celebrate.  In the latest set...
bacon-eluting stent

Cardiologists Now Deploying Bacon-Eluting Stents

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NASHVILLE, TN - Unfazed by the obesity epidemic and the glorious number of unhealthy choices at their disposal, Americans are always looking for innovative, quicker ways...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Falcons Blame Super Bowl Loss on Anesthesia

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HOUSTON, TX - The New England Patriots came back from a 25-point deficit to complete the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history, winning 34-28...
Super Bowl LI shootout

Houston Trauma Teams Prepare for Deadly Super Bowl Shootout

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HOUSTON, TX - Emergency crews and trauma teams in the Houston area are nervous but ready for Sunday night, as experts are expecting a...
sonogram

Beyoncé’s 3-Month Sonogram Reveals Twins Harmonizing In Womb

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NEW YORK, NY - Speaking after a routine visit to the pop sensation's obstetrician, Beyoncé's agent confirmed to the press that the most recent...
court

Mother Who Pushed Child into Medicine Charged with Parental Malpractice

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BOCA RATON, FL - An area mother who recklessly pushed her son into the field of medicine has been charged with 6 counts of...
rhabdo

Forrest Gump Still in Rhabdo 30 Years After Epic Cross-Country Run

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Though it has been three decades since his historic three-and-a-half year cross-country run brought him national attention, Birmingham Medical Center (BMC)...
pillow

Intern Describes Patient’s Pillow as Soft, Nontender

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SACRAMENTO, CA - Intern Dale Sheppard went to see one of his patients early this morning, only to find her stewing because the pillows were...
Ancef pump

Orthopod Caught Auscultating Ancef Pump

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ATLANTA, GA - "Shhh," orthopedic surgeon Thor Hammersley told befuddled onlookers as he used a stethoscope (or, as he puts it, "a mini jump rope") to...