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ophthalmology

Ophthalmologists Bracing Themselves for Full Day of Work After Solar Eclipse

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SALEM, OR - Ophthalmologists throughout the country are bracing themselves for what could be an entire day of work immediately after the solar eclipse...
overpenetration underpenetration

Inappropriate: Radiologists Keep Talking About Over/Underpenetration

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CHICAGO, IL - Health care professionals are up in arms over their radiology colleagues at Chicago Medical Center, who keep talking about overpenetration and underpenetration...

AAOS: Osteoporosis Renamed Bone Failure

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“Bone failure. It’s the new hotness. Now let’s start taking it seriously!”

Surgeon Excited to Watch Prep Dry

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CHICAGO, IL - It’s no secret that Dr. Mike Flannigan likes to watch the prep dry on all his patients. According to numerous sources...
dilaudid graph

Study: Dilaudid Administration Directly Correlates with High Patient Satisfaction; Narcan Not So Much

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BOSTON, MA - As many doctors and nurses have discovered the hard way, a recent study published in the New England Journal of Medicine...

‘Twas the Night Shift Before Christmas‏

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‘Twas the night shift before Christmas, when all through the ER, Patients were coming in by ambulance, by bus, and by car. The choice of ED...
registered nurses

Hospital Administrators Rename RNs to ‘Refreshments and Narcotics’

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TAMPA, FL - In order to comply with new government healthcare regulations involving patient satisfaction, hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital have decided to rename...
turkey sandwich haldol diets

New Haldol Creamy Spread Added to Emergency Room Sandwiches

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PROVIDENCE, RI - Health care providers are raving about a new haloperidol-based condiment that can be surreptitiously added to almost any hospital meal tray,...

Intern honored for shortening length of stay by leaving everyone NPO

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Intern Connor was given the distinguished length of stay award by prestigious academic hospital. During his acceptance speech he stated he was not surprised...
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Breaking: Doctor Inconsolable Over Loss of Favorite Pen

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TOWSON, MD - Unable to hold back the tears welling up in his eyes since he learned of the heartbreaking news, internal medicine attending...