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minding business

Public Health Concern: ‘Stop Minding Your Own Business’

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a press conference today the CDC announced that there is a resurgence in a seemingly incurable public health concern that...
patient satisfaction scores

After Rapid Response, Hospital Administration Organizes Rapid Satisfaction Team

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Mr. Cheapest Executive Officer at Lord Have Mercy Hospital is one serious CEO who is always concerned about addressing all the whims of the...

AMA Adds Complaining As An Official Vital Sign

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After extensive deliberation, the American Medical Association has decided to make complaining a vital sign. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, complaining “is to say or...

Psych Ward Temporarily Closes after Admitting a Patient with COPD

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Charleston, WV - The Psychiatric Inpatient Unit at Memorial Hospital has temporarily closed due to an unplanned, insidious event. “The day started off as...
sh*tty consult

Honesty FTW! Physician Signs Note “Thanks for the Sh*tty Consult”

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BOSTON, MA - Making no attempt to hide his obvious displeasure in what was a "late" and "totally bogus" consult, infectious diseases fellow Luke...
rhabdo

Forrest Gump Still in Rhabdo 30 Years After Epic Cross-Country Run

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Though it has been three decades since his historic three-and-a-half year cross-country run brought him national attention, Birmingham Medical Center (BMC)...

Interventional Radiology and General Radiology Sign Nuclear Treaty

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OSLO, NORWAY - This past Friday the American Radiology Association facilitated a landmark nuclear deal between members of interventional radiology and general radiology. Deep-rooted...
clown doctor

Doctor Finds New Life As A Clown More Fulfilling

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Pediatrician Jim Smith is thrilled with his new career as a professional Clown. He specializes in children’s birthday parties but has the skill set...

Struggling Hospital Converts Idle Operating Rooms Into Escape Rooms on Weekend

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SPRINGFIELD, NJ—One of the most popular new forms of entertainment may be coming to a hospital near you. In an effort to make more...
Delta WiFi bicarb

SOL: In-Flight Emergency Medical Kit Just Contains Bicarb

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DELTA 1342 - Well, I hate to break this news to you, especially since you were just so nice enough to volunteer and help...