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Middle School Dance Put on Contact Precautions

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Following the shocking display of "grinding" at last Fall's Homecoming dance, local Gandy Middle School PTA President, Karen Sterling, pushed to prophylactically put the...
rolling dice

Triage Nurse Rolls Dice to Determine Patient Priority Level‏

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Mercy Regional Hospital ER's newest RN Heidi Evans has been having a rough start to her career at the triage desk, where her job...
medical ethics team

Breaking: Ethics Team Caught with Murder, Running Prostitution Ring

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SAVANNAH, GA - In disturbing news, Savannah Medical Center's Medical Ethics consult team was arrested and brought into custody by local police and FBI...
Rand Paul

Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level

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KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
io access

Intern Places Wrong IO Access, Gets Intraocular Access by Mistake‏

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AUSTIN, TX  - In yet another case of medical “whoops-a-daisy” late last night, intern Alex Franklin mistook his supervising resident’s order to obtain emergency...

Miracle on the Hudson: NYC Nurse Lands Foley in 600-Pound Female Patient

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HUDSON VALLEY, NY - A miracle occurred on Saturday as Cathy Meyers, night shift RN at Hudson Valley Hospital, found herself staring at the...
mechanical ventilator

Night Shift Enjoys New Ventilator Mode

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GOLETA, CA - Puritan Bennett's new ventilator mode is a hit with the Bay Harbor Hospital night shift. Along with the standard AC, SIMV,...

Proactive Patient Does Own Admission Orders, H&P

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QUEENS, NY - In one of the best examples in recent memory of medical self-ownership, a proactive patient not only sought medical attention but...
ophthalmology

Ophthalmologists Report Hindsight More Like 20/80

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Top ophthalmologists announced this week that hindsight, long thought to be 20/20, is actually much closer to 20/80.  “This is...
BLS online

New Research Shows Virtual Online BLS/ACLS Course Not Saving Real Lives

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PHOENIX, AZ - Although popular with millennials and medical administrators, new research shows that online BLS/ACLS training is not effective at instilling the muscle-memory...