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Medical Ethics: Magician Orthopedist Elects Not to Saw Patient in Half Due to Conflict...

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LAS VEGAS, NV - In an apparent conflict of interest, orthopedist and amateur magician, Dr. Felipe Ross, elected not to saw his patient in...
hospital party

Attendings Gather for Annual “Housestaff Fantasy” Draft

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Twelve attendings from Piermont Valley Hospital gathered in the hospital library last Tuesday at 7:30 pm for their annual "Fantasy Housestaff" Draft. Dr. Tom Droca,...
hospital workers

Research Indicates All Bleeding Stops Eventually

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BETHESDA, MD - According to sources at the NIH, yes, it is true: all bleeding stops.  This insight came to much relief of general surgery intern,...
Waiting Room

Tired of Waiting, Patient Develops “Chest Pain” in ER

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ARLINGTON, VA – 32-year-old patient George Hightower rolled his ankle playing basketball this Saturday afternoon.  He went to the ER only after much persuasion from friends to...

Dr. Oz’s Show Set to Return After Study Says His Advice Will Only Kill...

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NEW YORK, NY—Dr. Oz’s self-titled talk show, which sadly has been on hiatus due to the coronavirus pandemic, is set to resume tapings immediately...

Hospital Custodial Manager: ‘I Love Irritating the S**t Out of Them’

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CLEVELAND, OH - GomerBlog reporters are able to confirm that custodial staff at Memorial Hospital do indeed intentionally buff floors and clean bathrooms at...
PA

PA Furious for Being Mistaken for Nurse, Struggles to Explain She’s Not a Physician

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CHICAGO, IL - Physician assistant (PA) Susan Jonesby was doing morning discharge planning for her employer Galen-Vaselius Orthopaedics when tragedy of unimaginable proportions ruined...
anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Breaking: CMS Creates New Blame Anesthesia ICD-10 Codes

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) & National Center of Health Statistics (HCHS) have created a new set of...

‘I’m Never Going to Drink Again’ Uttered by 40 Million Americans New Year’s Morning

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The FDA estimates that over 40 million Americans will utter the phrase “I’m never going to drink again” on New Year’s...

Members of Congress may be in permanent cardiac arrest, study find

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Washington (DC). Research published today revealed that many of our politicians may be essentially dead, or close to dead. The study used data mining...