American Geriatrics Association Publishes Guidelines on Gomeritis
The American Geriatrics Association has finally published its guidelines on gomeritis, a complex entity caused by the progressive deterioration of a gomerular brain. A...
Doctor Calls Patient in Clinic to Get Her Off the Phone
HARRISBURG, PA - Ms. Rue D’Patient was entering the 6th minute of her phone call to a close friend. She was sitting in the...
North Korea Frantically Getting Rid of Expired Missiles Prior to Upcoming Joint Commission Inspection
PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA – The president of North Korea, Kim Jong-un shocked the world when he started launching missiles at a more frenetic pace than...
Person Going for Run in 95-Degree Weather Clearly Doesn’t Have Decision-Making Capacity
ATHENS, GA - Clearly not considering dire consequences like severe hydration, heat stroke, and heat exhaustion, runner Michael Rabdo has shown he does not...
New super powerful MRI machine causes transient reversal of earths magnetic poles but the...
People across the globe were on alert last Monday after mysterious wide spread power outages and electronic failures. Chaos ensued in many airports and...
Nurses Excited to Make Their Own PPE
A national shortage of personal protective equipment or PPE is forcing nurses to get creative.
"I'm so happy to live in a country where supplies...
Two Examples of Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Notes
Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Note #1
Procedure:
This is Spinal Tap.
Date/Time:
Optional.
Indication:
Infectious Diseases said it was a good idea.
Resident:
Dr. Kyle Richter, PGY-1.
Attending:
Yes.
A time-out was completed to...
Badass: Cardiologist Stents Own Proximal LAD Just ‘Cause He Can
NASHVILLE, TN - In a dazzling display of both self-sufficiency and badassery, Vanderbilt cardiologist Dr. Barnett Timberland has just successfully stented his own proximal...
Oncologist Dr. Trump: Making Your Body Great Again
NEW YORK, NY - Dr. Trump makes his rounds through the halls of NYU's hospital and you can overhear his barking: "Cisplatin you're FIRED,...
COVID-19: CDC Recommends We Move to Antarctica While We Still Have the Chance
ATLANTA, GA - Cautioning that its newest recommendation is not meant to alarm the American public or imply that we are losing the fight...