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plywood spool

Generous Administrators Upgrade Medicine Conference Room Table with Large Plywood Spool

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ALBANY, NY - In a show of boundless generosity, the hospital administration has donated a large plywood spool to the internal medicine work room to...

Orthopaedic Surgeons Declared Strongest Species on Earth

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GABORONE, BOTSWANA - Inspired by the 2018 World’s Strongest Man competition, local orthopaedic surgeon Jamies Baylee started pondering if there exists a species of...
post call texting

New Study: Clinical Decision-Making Impaired After 30-Hour Calls Based on Post-Call Spikes in Texts...

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ANN ARBOR, MI - The past few years have witnessed several efforts to categorically study the effects of extended calls on residents’ satisfaction, performance, and...

Study: Cure for Covid-19 Likely in Same Vortex or Alternate Dimension Containing Missing Pens

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BOSTON, MA - A landmark, peer-reviewed study published earlier today in the New England Journal of COVID-19 suggests that the cure for novel coronavirus,...
surgeon tired fusion

Whoops! Sleepy On-Call Resident Checked on Crashing Patient in Her Dream

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SLEEPY HOLLOW, NY—Amidst a barrage of serious allegations from hospital staff that, during a recent overnight on-call shift, she neglected a nurse’s request to...

Spine Surgeon Pleads for Children to Stop Stepping On Sidewalk Cracks

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INTERCOURSE, PA – Many things have been lost in the current generation to include basic social skills, manners, and the ability to poop without...

CDC Warning: Dangerous “Dry Humping” Bug Found in Lower U.S.

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) has identified a new insect vector that is rampantly spreading disease in the southern portions...
hospital gurney

Physician DCs Bed in Order to Get Patient to Leave Hospital

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DETROIT, MI - In a fit of mild rage and decisive action, local physician Dr. Enuf wrote his final order in the battle with an...

Code Brown Forces Hospital Evacuation; SWAT and FBI Called In

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LOS ANGELES, CA - A local medical center was evacuated this morning after a Code Brown in the pediatric wing of the hospital quickly...
pharmacy

Doctorate of Pharmacy Programs to Add CVS, Walgreens Rewards Card Education Requirement

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WASHINGTON, DC - As a result of successful congressional lobbying efforts by the “big corner drug store” lobby, doctorate of pharmacy programs nationwide will...