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Researchers Discover Length of “A While”

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ST. LOUIS, MO -  It turns out, when a patient’s symptoms have been present for “a while,” they began about 4.2 months ago. So say researchers...
NCLEX test nurses

NCLEX Test Writers Admit to Picking Esoteric and Outlandish Questions

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TALLAHASSEE, FL - “Complete frustration” were frequent comments thrown around by recent test takers of the National Council Licensure Examination (NCLEX), hoping to obtain nursing licensure. "The...
confused nurse wound care

Risk Management, Proctology Consulted After RN Confuses PRN and PR Orders

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CRESTED BUTTE, CO - In what’s being labeled “an unfortunate incident that we’re all trying to get behind us,” St. Indignant’s Hospital administrator Paul...

The Michael Jordan of Interns Retires After Curing His 6th Patient

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CLEVELAND, OH - We all know Dr. Mark Jeffries by now.  He is the Michael Jordan of interns.  Setting records by storm, Jeffries has set the...
vaginal bleeding

Commentary: I Wish Someone Would Tell Me Why My Vagina Keeps Bleeding

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My name is Valerie.  I'm thirty-five years old and I've been blessed with good health my entire life.  I'm happily married and have two...
surgery

Medical Student Inadvertently Contaminates Entire OR by Mere Brief Existence

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ATLANTA, GA - “Don’t touch that!” snapped the surgical tech, referring to anything and everything in the OR at once.  Although he was standing...
doctor updating

What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 2

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This is a continuation from our first post: What "Thank You for the Interesting Consult" Really Means, Part 1.  Let’s go! Nutrition Translation: Like it or...

Nation to Vote on Which Celebrity to Sacrifice to COVID19 Gods

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Who will you vote to eliminate; Miley Cyrus, Malone Post, Kanye West, or all of the Kardashians? All we know is that even if it doesn't stop the virus, America still wins!
hipster

Hipster Loses Left Testicle Due to Excessively Tight Pants

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WILLIAMSBURG, NY - Hipster Fletcher Jones was admitted to the emergency room last night with numbness and tingling around the groin.  The incident occurred...
Physical therapy hyperacute rehab

Breaking: PT Recommends Hyperacute Rehab

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ATLANTA, GA - Stating the potential for significant functional gains and a return to baseline in a matter of minutes, physical therapist Darryl Young has recommended his hospitalized...