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ICU Hires Wardrobe Consultants to Help With Donning and Doffing of Contact Gowns, Compliance...

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WEST JERSEY, UK - Around 90% of the patients in the ICU's at West Jersey Regional Medical Center were on contact precautions last fiscal...
turkey in code cart

Study Finds Lack of Turkey Sandwiches Correlates with Rise of Death in the ER

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CHICAGO, IL - In a new study done by the Patients For Turkey Sandwiches (PFTS), it is found that a lack of turkey sandwiches...
fitbit monitor

Game On: Fitbit Raises Target to 10 Trillion Steps Per Day

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - In what they're calling an inevitable but necessary update for our country, Fitbit, the maker of health and fitness activity trackers,...

The Latest Fashion Trend for the Fall: Chin Hammocks

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The fall is here and with it, comes the latest fashion trends for the coolest and hippest of people of the world: those who...

ABIM Rewrites Board Exam: All Questions Now Covid-19-Related

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PHILADELPHIA, PA—Recognizing that no other diseases matter anymore, the American Board of Internal Medicine (ABIM) is rewriting its entire 2020 exam so that every...
pastoral care

Breaking: Inpatient Pastoral Care Team Suffering Burnout

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ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, sh*t has hit the fan as GomerBlog is sad to report that our pastoral care teams nationwide are emotionally...
cheetos sign

New Cheetos Finger Decision Rule for Abdominal Pain

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ANDERSON, CA - In a bold move, the Emergency Physicians at St Vincent Hospital in Anderson California have introduced the “Cheetos Fingers” sign into...

Headlines from the Week in Medical News

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ROCHESTER, NY - After two-year grant-writing process, associate professor of medicine’s submission to JAMA’s “funny cartoon caption contest” fails peer review process. AKRON, OH -...
spay neuter frightened favorite pen

New Report Shows Patients & July Interns Equally Frightened by One Another

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NEW YORK, NY - Patients and July interns are all equally frightened by one another during the month of July, sometimes into August and...
Ativan

The Pen Is Mightier Than the Sword, But This Ativan Tho

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This Charlie Hebdo incident is horrendous.  Free speech is a vital right, but I know something else even more vital to ensure world peace....