Patient Satisfaction Survey Study Halted, Mortality Increased 238% with Patient Satisfaction
LOS ANGELES, CA - "We have to halt this study immediately!" was a warning issued by lead researcher, Dr. Hans Willford from UCLA. "Long-term mortality...
Area Emergency Physician Successfully Manages Gout Without Consultation
SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Confetti is raining down from the ceilings as emergency medicine physician Deion Gnosis is being congratulated for diagnosing and...
Doctor Summons Courage to Toss Unread New England Journals
PITTSBURGH, PA - Sometimes it's better to acknowledge one's own shortcomings and move on. That is why we're saluting a hero, internist Dr. Keisha...
Powerful New Hand Dryer Can Dry, Detach Hands in 8 Seconds
EAST LONGMEADOW, MA - Manufacturer of XLERATOR hand dryers, Excel Dryer, has announced that it has produced their most powerful hand dryer yet, called...
Millennial Woman Admitted to Millennial ICU Because She “Can’t Even”
TAMPA, FL - Missy Howell, a 25-year-old from the suburbs was recently rushed to St. Felicia Medical Center by friends after an acute episode of...
TSA Takes Wrist X-Rays for Poorly-Insured Passenger
NEW YORK, NY - Shocked at the out-of-pocket costs he was incurring for the care of his recent wrist fracture, New York area resident...
Snapchat Filters Prove Helpful for Female Physician’s Telemedicine Business
Boston, MA - With the current COVID-19 crisis many physicians are turning to telemedicine to offer continuity of care to their patients. One female,...
Orthopedic Resident Suspended for Not Logging Romantic Endeavors
NEW YORK, NY - Richard Steel, a PGY-4 orthopaedic resident in New York City, was suspended from duties after failing to log his dates...
Homeopath to Drug Seeker: ‘I Thought You Said Dilute It’
SEATTLE, WA - Friday, local drug-seeker Garrett Ashton was reportedly shocked to learn that his Dilaudid was not available for pick-up, and in fact,...
Hospital Workers Can’t Think of Any Other Place They’d Rather Be on Thanksgiving Day
EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital workers eagerly awoke this morning, ready and energized to take on another thrilling work day at their local hospitals. The fact...