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emoji for orthopedic surgeons interpreted

Orthopaedics to Begin to Use Emojis in Progress Notes

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CHICAGO, IL - In a progressive move by the National Orthopaedic Society of Orthopaedic Surgeons and Orthopaedists (NOSOSO), emojis have now been approved to...
thoughts and prayers

Randomized Controlled Trial Finds #ThoughtsAndPrayers Superior to #Thoughts or #Prayers Alone

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BERKELEY, CA - A recent study of millennial patients diagnosed with chronic diseases found that social media posts with #ThoughtsAndPrayers were more effective than...
orthopedic surgeon orthopedics orthopaedics

Thousands of Surgeons Dying Daily of Wearing Masks

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Chicago, IL- The American Association of Orthopaedic Surgeons announced today that the nation is running out of orthopaedic surgeons.  “We’re losing 1,500-2,000 surgeons everyday. They’re...

Multi-Use Medication Vials Used More Than Once, Pharmacy Puzzled

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SHARON, PA - In the epic battle for hospital supremacy, Anesthesia vanquished Radiology by delaying an OR case much longer than the fifteen minutes...
colonoscopy

Gastroenterologists Recommend Daily Screening Colonoscopy

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BETHESDA, MD - In an effort to improve colorectal cancer screening in the United States, where it is the second leading cause of cancer...
multiple choice test

Newly-Minted Third-Year Medical Student Puzzled by Lack of Multiple-Choice Question

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Jenner Hobbs, a fresh new face on the internal medicine wards, is having trouble adjusting to his new environment. Having just finished the first...
single ply toilet paper

Emergency Room Switch to Single-Ply Toilet Paper Reduces Unnecessary Gastro Admissions by 60%

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MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA - A major tertiary emergency department in Melbourne recently conducted a trial of single-ply toilet paper across all bathrooms and found a...

Opinion: Like Michigan Leaders, I Also Prefer My Water Corrosive and Full of Lead

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I’m sure you’re reading about the Flint water crisis and thinking the same thing as me: Michigan Governor Rick Snyder, the state’s Department of...

Zoo CT Scanner Inundated with Morbidly Obese Humans

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HOUSTON, TX - The Great Texas Zoo had very high hopes for a newly installed $2M CT scanner. Local veterinarian Dr. Levi Quinn informed...
exercises

Chest Compressions & Other Great Work Exercises

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It's a fact: health care professions wake up early and get home late.  Who has time to exercise?  The answer: do your exercises at...