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the purge

The Joint Commission Announces First Annual ‘Patient Safety Purge’

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In a move sparked by the popularity of the horror movie franchise, The Purge, the Joint Commission for the Accreditation of Hospital Organizations (JCAHO)...
naturopathy

Brilliant Diagnosis Made by Naturopath; Cure Coming Any Day Now

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SEATTLE, WA - Local woman Barbara Hootro was finally diagnosed by acclaimed Naturopath “Dr. Bob,” accomplishing what 6 different doctors before him could not...
vaccination

Breaking: Reports Emerge About An Uneventful MMR Vaccination

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ROCHESTER, NY - In what was internationally hailed as a medical first, doctors at Mount Saint Mary Mercy Hospital announced they are confident a...
work burnout

FDA approves first novel drug to treat medical burnout

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TWISP, WA - The US Food and Drug Administration today approved Peaceaudi (Idongivafumab) injection for intravenous use for the treatment of medical burnout. “Medical burnout...

Bicyclist Doctor Dons Scrubs Plastered with Advertising and Sexy Cute Buttpads

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Dr. Javier Dorfmann has perennially unfulfilled fantasies about competing in the Tour de France.  Just starting his second year of internal medicine residency at...
mri scanner

Hospital Discontinues MRI Screening Forms, Press-Ganey Scores Soar

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In a presentation to the American Association of Gullible Hospital Administrators, Shady Practices Medical Centers reported that as a result of numerous satisfaction surveys,...
rectal exam

April 18th 2016, National Rectal Exam Day, Free Exams at IRS Building

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to ensure the health of all Americans, the United States government has officially made April 18th, 2016 as National...
anesthesia clinic

Anesthesia Pre-Op Clinic Moved to the 4th Floor

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CLEVELAND, OH – With budgets being slashed and insurers looking to save money, the Anesthesia Department at Memorial Hospital made a significant change to its...
upset doctor

Things Residency Has Stolen From Me

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Sleep... many many hours of sleep. Meals... 3 meals a day now equals one granola bar and a cup of coffee. Time… Having time to have a bowel...

Proactive Patient Does Own Admission Orders, H&P

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QUEENS, NY - In one of the best examples in recent memory of medical self-ownership, a proactive patient not only sought medical attention but...