New Product Release: Pediatric Power Chair for Morbidly Obese Children
WHITE PLAINS, NY - In a shrewd but brilliant marketing move last week, Hoveranywhere announced plans to sell thousands of "smaller-sized" pediatric power chairs.
The chairs are...
FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
The Most Interesting Patient in the World
Humana pays him a co-insurance to go to the ER.
His in-network coverage follows him wherever he goes.
He drives the ambulance to his own emergencies.
He...
Medical Student Conducts History & Physical with Spanish-Speaking Patient Using Only the Word ‘Dolor’
BOCA RATON, FL - Third-year medical student extraordinaire Gunner McBrownnose, only using the word "dolor," successfully conducted a complete history & physical encounter with...
Top 10 Signs It’s Time to Break Up with Your Pager
You and your pager have likely formed a long and memorable relationship together while sitting on your hip. Over time the initial lust may...
New Study Describes “Y.M.C.A. Reflex”
BOSTON, MA—It has been observed for decades and is so commonplace as to almost be an afterthought. And yet, after a thorough review of the...
CDC Wants to Remind Americans They Can Still Get Their Flu Vaccine Rectally
ATLANTA, GA - With influenza activity expected to pick up in the next several weeks, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) wants to...
First Year Resident Upset with how Attending Manages DKA
PHILADELPHIA- In just her second week of Internal Medicine Residency at the University Hospital, Dr. Jamie Jones was upset yesterday with the way her...
Badass: Cardiologist Stents Own Proximal LAD Just ‘Cause He Can
NASHVILLE, TN - In a dazzling display of both self-sufficiency and badassery, Vanderbilt cardiologist Dr. Barnett Timberland has just successfully stented his own proximal...
Breaking: Hippocrates Copy & Pasted Oath from Plato’s Note
ATHENS, GREECE - The Archaeological Society of Athens has rocked the medical world after it has found overwhelming evidence suggesting that the Hippocratic Oath...