Medicare Institutes New ‘Gratuity-Based’ Compensation Plan
WASHINGTON, DC - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) began the rollout of their revolutionary new compensation model this week, in which physicians...
New Cosmetic Anesthesia Services Get Glowing Patient Reviews
CALABASAS, CA - Patient satisfaction has skyrocketed at a local California hospital after the decision to implement a Cosmetic Anesthesia program. Surgical patients can...
The Epic EHR Bartender
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Wait until I log on… (30 seconds) Welcome to Hyperspace!
Patron: I’d like a beer.
Epic: Pick from this list.
Patron: Hmm…...
Hospital to Replace Clipboard Nurses with iPad Nurses
SEATTLE, WA - Greater Seattle Memorial Hospital announced plans earlier today to replace its clipboard nurses with iPad nurses. Specifically, senior-level nursing personnel who...
Operating Room Swear Jars Set to Pay Down National Debt by 2018
WASHINGTON, DC – The American College of Surgeons was pleased to announce today that their “Operating Room Swear Jar Initiative” will soon generate enough...
Previous Owner of First Aid for the USMLE Step 1 Book Obviously Failed Step...
COLUMBUS, OH - Stephen Morrical, a second-year medical student at The Ohio State University, reported yesterday that the previous owner of his First Aid...
With Sanders Out of 2016 Race, CDC Urges Those Still ‘Feeling the Bern’ to...
ATLANTA, GA – Following the announcement from the Sanders campaign that he has officially withdrawn his candidacy from the 2016 Democratic Presidential Primary Race,...
Hypochondriasis Fibromyalgica
Are you feeling a constant itch in the back of your throat? Do you have a headache after binge watching TV or playing 3...
Dystonia (Disturbia)
What’s wrong with me?
Why am I doing this?
I’m moving crazy now
I wake up in my bed
Can't even get it started
Clenching tight, so widespread
Can't even...
Orthopaedic Surgeon Admits to Inventing CrossFit to Finance College for His Children
LOS ANGELES, CA – After his twin daughters were both accepted to Ivy League colleges starting in 2000 and already paying for his son’s...