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davinci robot

Orthopedic Surgeon Uses da Vinci Robot, Voids the Warranty

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FLORENCE, ID – The OR staff here at Idaho Regional Medical Center is buzzing with the news that the hospital’s only da Vinci robot...

12 Days of Christmas – Hospital Style

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On the first day of Christmas my true love bought for me, a prep with a colonoscopy. On the second day of Christmas my true...

RN Relieved to Find Out That Patient’s Family Member’s Aunt is a Nurse

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HASTINGS, CA – Jenny Pasternak, an ICU nurse, was “very worried” about her shift tonight.  “I have been working as a nurse for 14 years...
constipation

Joint Commission Creates New ‘Primary Constipation Center’ Certification

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - On Monday, the Joint Commission unveiled its new certification aimed at the rapid treatment of constipation. "Constipation affects nearly 4 million...
io access

Intern Places Wrong IO Access, Gets Intraocular Access by Mistake‏

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AUSTIN, TX  - In yet another case of medical “whoops-a-daisy” late last night, intern Alex Franklin mistook his supervising resident’s order to obtain emergency...

DIY Appendectomy Kit Now Available

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With surgeons’ schedules increasingly filled, a DIY appendectomy kit has been created to save both patients' and doctors' time. “Appendectomies are really easy,” said general...

Master Radiologist Able to Hedge on Every Possible Medical Condition

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BOSTON, MA – According to the abdominal CT scan report internist Dr. Sam Erikson just pulled up, master radiologist Dr. Bart Waddell has once again...
ridiculously restrictive transfusion

Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death

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BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have...

Medical Records Censor Crucial at Removing Admission and Discharge Summaries for Transfer

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MUDVILLE, TN - Jimmy Blake, MBA, MHA, Good Samaritan’s Vice President for Administrative Affairs, speaking on condition of having his full name printed at...
the purge

The Joint Commission Announces First Annual ‘Patient Safety Purge’

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In a move sparked by the popularity of the horror movie franchise, The Purge, the Joint Commission for the Accreditation of Hospital Organizations (JCAHO)...