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ER

Goop from ER Break Room Becomes Sentient, Asks for Dilaudid

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DALLAS, TX - In an amazing breakthrough for science, a new life form has spontaneously willed itself into existence in the break room of a...
confused doctor

Patient’s Pregnancy Test Positive Despite Denying Sexual Activity; Obstetricians Baffled

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A 15-lead ECG, two X-rays, an ultrasound, a full-body CT, an MRI with gadolinium, and still, a mystery. “It’s perplexing, that’s for sure,” said Dr. Jouseph...

New “Code 7/19” Intubation Protocol Keeps Day Nurse Around to Finish Sstorm He Started

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The time is 1859 and pagers throughout the ICU begin to chirp. It’s time: Tube O’clock. This simple and easy protocol was designed to...
orthopedic surgeons

Nation’s Surgeons Announce Plans to Sit on It

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USA - In a unified statement from general surgeons across the country, the nation’s surgeons have announced a plan to sit on it until...

“You signed up for this”, says admin from comfort of home

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Karen, just one of the many admin comprising 34% of US healthcare costs, sent a department-wide email yesterday in response to concerns about PPE...
patient

Nevada Nursing Facility Pioneering Breast-To-Mouth (B2M) Resuscitation

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LAS VEGAS, NV - In the wake of bundled Medicare payments, a Nevada geriatric nursing facility run by neonatologist-turned-geriatrician, Dr. Hugh Mounds, has begun...

Breaking: Joy Behar Hospitalized, Wonders ‘Why Are There So Many People Pretending to Be...

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NEW YORK, NY – Reports are coming in from NYU where Joy Behar was hospitalized recently.  Due to her recent celebrity status among health...
medical call day

ZDoggMD: It Was A Good Call Day

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LAS VEGAS, NV - ZDoggMD drops yet another dope video: "It Was A Good Call Day."  Son, he is straight trippin' in this video! "What...

Nurses Excited to Make Their Own PPE

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A national shortage of personal protective equipment or PPE is forcing nurses to get creative. "I'm so happy to live in a country where supplies...
hospital specials

Emergency Department Offers Daily Specials: Revenue Skyrocketing

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RALEIGH, NC - The competitive and creative business of healthcare and medical treatment has suffered in the US due to the unsustainable and skyrocketing...