Hospital Security Successfully Lobbies for Independent Practice
Reno, NV - In a rare demonstration of bipartisan support, hospital security officers were granted full and unrestricted rights to practice police work independently...
Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab
SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out. Pay was decreasing and vacation...
Medical Student Disappears in Search of Mysterious Codman Triangle
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Arun Matthews, a 3rd year medical student has been reported missing from his third floor library cubicle since the early hours...
Bitcoin Users Infected with Cryptocurrency Meningitis
ATLANTA, GA - Over the past month, volatile swings in bitcoin have led to an ominous halving of its value, which has thrown investors...
Nation to Vote on Which Celebrity to Sacrifice to COVID19 Gods
Who will you vote to eliminate; Miley Cyrus, Malone Post, Kanye West, or all of the Kardashians? All we know is that even if it doesn't stop the virus, America still wins!
Song of the Diverticulite (Morphine on High at 3am)
All the bickering of which is best
The song, the canvass, the word, the marbled stone,
The rest
Pittance such luxury
Lacking any test
Pittance yes!
Void of existential quest
Ver-Sed,...
Santa Uses Electronic Gifts Record and Screws up Bigtime
“It has been a disaster,” said Santa while banging his head against the computer monitor screen. “It has never taken me so long to...
Regional Anesthesiologist Master of the Cock Block
San Diego, California - Ronald Flackey, MD is not like just any Anesthesiologist. In addition to the 4 years of medical school and 4...
Ophthalmologists Found to be “Physically Weakest” of All Specialists
New research has shed light on which group of physicians are the most physically frail and feeble. Emerging data shows that the top spot...
IT Requires EMR Password to be 500 Characters Long
BOSTON, MA - Reflecting what is soon-to-be standard practice at all health care systems across the country, the Information Technology Department at Massachusetts Lieutenant...