Hypochondriacs Try to Cope with Pandemic: It’s Not Going So Wel
SICKLERVILLE, NJ—Local hypochondriac, Emma Dyne, is not taking any chances with the coronavirus pandemic. For the last month, the 25-year-old healthy woman has worn...
Breaking News: Scientists Almost Know What the ‘V’ in COVID Stands For
TULSA, OK- In a major update in the race for a vaccine for COVID-19, we have learned of a promising development from the scientific...
With USMLE Now Pass/Fail, Residency Directors Dread Having to Read Rest of Application
ATLANTA, GA—While medical students everywhere rejoice over the news that Step 1 of the United States Medical Licensing Examination (USMLE) is moving to a...
ABIM Rewrites Board Exam: All Questions Now Covid-19-Related
PHILADELPHIA, PA—Recognizing that no other diseases matter anymore, the American Board of Internal Medicine (ABIM) is rewriting its entire 2020 exam so that every...
Regional Anesthesiologist Master of the Cock Block
San Diego, California - Ronald Flackey, MD is not like just any Anesthesiologist. In addition to the 4 years of medical school and 4...
Criminals Decry “Cultural Appropriation” by Masked Civilians
The latest CDC recommendations for all U.S. citizens to wear face masks when in public has created backlash from an unexpected quarter: career criminals.
Long...
Departmental Didactics Migrated to Jerkmate.com
In light of the ongoing Covid-19 pandemic and the need for social distancing, your department announced today that all future didactics will be conducted...
Cursed 110-Year-Old Describes Living Through Both Spanish Flu & Coronavirus Pandemics
NEW YORK, NY—Calling herself the unluckiest woman ever, 110-year-old Dottie Livingston is one of the few people who has been alive for both the...
Surgeons to operate 6 feet away from patient in operating room
Per compliance with "social distancing," all OR staff will now stand 6 feet away from each other, including 6 feet away from the patient.
Neurosurgeon...
EHR team regrets letting clinicians vote on project name as BONER upgrade goes live
Multiple Electronic Health Systems consultants expressed regret Monday over a poorly conceived plan to allow clinicians to vote on their system's project name as...