Narc Madness
It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4! This year...
Tips: How to Pronounce a Difficult Drug Name Without Choking, Aspirating, Dying
Last month, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (“The” FDA) approved the efficacious and unpronounceable idarucizumab (also known, thankfully, as Praxbind) to reverse the...
Exciting New Medical App Allows Patients to Preorder Dilaudid Before ER Arrival
BOCA RATON, FL - Patient rights advocates from sea to shining sea are giving high compliments to Madre De Díos Medical Center for its...
Rare Patient Asks Only for Tylenol for Pain, Receives Standing Ovation
ATLANTA, GA - Chelsea Mason is one amazing woman. Only 12 hours removed from a knee replacement surgery for severe osteoarthritis, Mason has left...
FDA Approves OxyContin for Kids Tall Enough to Get on This Ride
PHARM WATER KINGDOM, FL - Acknowledging the importance for safe medicine in children, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) recently approved the potent painkiller OxyContin...
FDA Bans Any Narcotic with the Letter ‘D’ In It
ATLANTA, GA - The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) finally came to its senses today by agreeing to ban any narcotic that contains the...
ED Study Links Volume of Screaming to Patient’s Level of Pain
SAN ANTONIO, TX - In a landmark study published in this month's Annals of Emergency Medicine, researchers from an emergency department in Sarasota, Florida have found evidence...
Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”
TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
A Revolutionary New Objective Pain Scale Could Replace the 0-10 Pain Scale
The conventional 0-10 pain scale used as “the fifth vital sign” has made caregivers complacent in pain management. A new scale has been devolved...
Modified DEA License Allows Healthcare Practitioners to Not Prescribe Dilaudid
WASHINGTON, DC - In a brilliant collaboration by the Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) and nearly every medical professional organization in the United States, health...