Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools
LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...
Doctors Still Unclear Why Right Said Fred So Sexy It Hurts
LONDON, ENGLAND - Despite a battery of noninvasive and invasive diagnostic tests, doctors at London Medical Center remain puzzled, as they are still unclear why...
“Bieber Fever” Determined to Be Neurosyphilis
CAMBRIDGE, MA – Scientists have been investigating an outbreak that has been sweeping over the world the past several years that has been coined...
Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”
MIAMI, FL - All right stop! Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...
Psych Agrees: “It’s Just Another Manic Monday”
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Well, the weekend is over and it's the start of a new work week. For Tulane psychiatrist Curtis Loder, his...
Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...
LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.” Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...
New Musical Chairs Discharge Protocol Fun & Effective
NEW YORK, NY - Is your hospital filled to the gills? With patients sicker than ever, are discharges few and far between? Things may...
Lady Gaga’s Doctor Finding It Difficult to Auscultate Her Heart
NEW YORK, NY - Dr. Rubenstein told reporters Friday that he struggles to auscultate Lady’s heart. Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, also known as Lady Gaga,...
ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode
PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff,...
Hospital Gets Sexy as Overhead Speakers Start Playing a Little Marvin Gaye
ATLANTA, GA - Time to slow things down... real… slow… and heat things up. There’s a different feeling in the air at Georgia Medical...