Local Doctors Refuse to Take Care of Nickelback, Cite Do No Harm

6
DETROIT, MI - On Saturday at 3:14 p.m., Nickelback’s tour bus crashed into a herd of rouge elephants that had escaped from the now abandoned Detroit City...

Justin Timberlake: I’m Bringing Measles Baaaack

0
Recently Justin Timberlake announced to the world that he is not planning to vaccinate his child.  Evidently all the scientific evidence looks different behind...
stethoscope lost in hospital

Lady Gaga’s Doctor Finding It Difficult to Auscultate Her Heart

0
NEW YORK, NY - Dr. Rubenstein told reporters Friday that he struggles to auscultate Lady’s heart.  Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta, also known as Lady Gaga,...
physical therapy

PT Asks Patient to “Walk Like an Egyptian”

0
ATHENS, GA - In breaking rehabilitation news this morning, Athens Medical Center physical therapist (PT) Susanna Hoffs has just asked her deconditioned 89-year-old patient in...
geriatric fellowship

Snoop Dogg Completes Geriatrics Fellowship

28
LONG BEACH, CA - After seemingly vanishing from the public eye for over a decade, former rapper Calvin "Snoop Dogg" Broadus announced that he...

Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...

1
LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.”  Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...

Music Therapist Fired After Being Caught with Nickelback CD

0
TUSCALOOSA, AL - Local music therapist, Don D’Krell was relieved of his duties last week after nursing staff saw him bringing a Nickelback CD...
call button nursing lockout interval

Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”

0
MIAMI, FL - All right stop!  Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...
pina coladas

Ortho Likes Pina Coladas, Getting Caught in the Rain

0
SANTA MONICA, CA - In a stunning development that has taken place just over the past few minutes, Gomerblog has learned that Ortho likes...

Milli Vanilli No Longer Blames It on the Rain, Blames Anesthesia Instead

0
MUNICH, GERMANY - German R&B group Milli Vanilli is back in the spotlight.  After decades of purporting the theory that we should just "blame...