iv pump alarm

Local RN Reprograms IV Pump Alarm to Play Michael Bolton; Patients No Longer Report...

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BUFFALO, NY - When one hears the epithet "problem solver," one recalls the inventors of Duct Tape, Ativan, Propofol, and Discharged AMA.  Today, at...
pot of coffee

Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...
defibrillator

ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode

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PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff,...

Happy Birthday, Aretha! A Gomerblog Tribute

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And now a rare piece of news that is not about COVID-19: On March 25, 1942, the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin, was born....

Eminem Conference Brings Together Morbidity, Mortality & Hip-Hop

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DETROIT, MI - Yesterday’s sold-out Eminem conference at Detroit Medical Center went down as one of the greatest lunchtime conferences in history, with American...

Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...

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LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.”  Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...

Makes Sense: Shouting Out “Free Bird!” at Concerts a Form of Tic Disorder

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - It is inevitable when you go to a live concert: Between songs someone in the crowd screams out “Free Bird!”  Well,...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
musical chairs

New Musical Chairs Discharge Protocol Fun & Effective

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NEW YORK, NY - Is your hospital filled to the gills?  With patients sicker than ever, are discharges few and far between?  Things may...

Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself

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AUSTIN, TX - A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits to taking care of his vinyl records better than himself,...