defibrillator

ICU Team Develops Defibrillator With New Setting: The Slow Code Mode

39
PHOENIX, AZ - Luck of the Lady Hospital in Arizona has begun to trial a defibrillator developed by a few of its seasoned staff,...
pina coladas

Ortho Likes Pina Coladas, Getting Caught in the Rain

0
SANTA MONICA, CA - In a stunning development that has taken place just over the past few minutes, Gomerblog has learned that Ortho likes...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

1
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
femurs

Orthopod Uses Patient’s Femurs to Play the Drums

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Orthopedic surgeon Jake Crusher came home today supremely excited: it was his day off and he just bought a brand new...

Eminem Conference Brings Together Morbidity, Mortality & Hip-Hop

28
DETROIT, MI - Yesterday’s sold-out Eminem conference at Detroit Medical Center went down as one of the greatest lunchtime conferences in history, with American...
Daft Punk

Daft Punk Gets Unlucky, Catches Gonorrhea

0
PARIS, FRANCE - Known for their repeated declarations of "We're up all night to get lucky," French electronic music duo Daft Punk have unfortunately...
call button nursing lockout interval

Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”

0
MIAMI, FL - All right stop!  Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...

BREAKING: Z Dogg MD Not Related to Snoop Dogg

0
Unfortunately it appears that this theory was concocted after drinking too much Gin and Juice and must now be dropped like it is hot and allowed to lay low.

Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol

2
HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson.  He has been unable to...

Doctors Still Unclear Why Right Said Fred So Sexy It Hurts

15
LONDON, ENGLAND - Despite a battery of noninvasive and invasive diagnostic tests, doctors at London Medical Center remain puzzled, as they are still unclear why...