physical therapy

PT Asks Patient to “Walk Like an Egyptian”

0
ATHENS, GA - In breaking rehabilitation news this morning, Athens Medical Center physical therapist (PT) Susanna Hoffs has just asked her deconditioned 89-year-old patient in...

The Difference Between a Pianist and a Penis

0
In this series, Gomerblog delves deep into two things often mistaken for one another and helps sort out their differences in order to help...
pot of coffee

Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools

24
LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...
call button nursing lockout interval

Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”

0
MIAMI, FL - All right stop!  Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...

Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself

0
AUSTIN, TX - A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits to taking care of his vinyl records better than himself,...
guitar

Clinical Scenarios & Songs That Pair Well Together

0
We all know about performing CPR to The Bee Gees’ Stayin’ Alive.  That got us thinking: Maybe we should think of songs for other...

Gastroenterologist Discovers Advanced Colonoscopy Technique, Twerk Position, While Working on Miley Cyrus

0
ANAHEIM, CA - Dr. Dan Abernath, known as the gastroenterologist to the stars, submitted a paper to Gastroenterology, describing a new advanced colonoscopy technique...

ER Visits Down 72% When it Rains, Trial to Focus on Healing Power of...

8
NEW ORLEANS, LA – A multicenter observational study last year reviewed millions of ER visits and found that ER visits are down 72% when it rains....
musical chairs

New Musical Chairs Discharge Protocol Fun & Effective

0
NEW YORK, NY - Is your hospital filled to the gills?  With patients sicker than ever, are discharges few and far between?  Things may...
Daft Punk

Daft Punk Gets Unlucky, Catches Gonorrhea

0
PARIS, FRANCE - Known for their repeated declarations of "We're up all night to get lucky," French electronic music duo Daft Punk have unfortunately...