femurs

Orthopod Uses Patient’s Femurs to Play the Drums

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Orthopedic surgeon Jake Crusher came home today supremely excited: it was his day off and he just bought a brand new...

Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol

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HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson.  He has been unable to...
CDC The Cure Friday I'm in Love

CDC Announces “It’s Friday, I’m in Love!!”

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ATLANTA, GA - After informing Thursday that it didn't care about it, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has happily announced that...

Miley Cyrus Undergoing Evaluation for Myoclonic Twerks

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ROCHESTER, MN - American singer and actress Miley Cyrus has told Gomerblog that she has experienced worsening myoclonic twerks over the past several months...

ER Visits Down 72% When it Rains, Trial to Focus on Healing Power of...

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NEW ORLEANS, LA – A multicenter observational study last year reviewed millions of ER visits and found that ER visits are down 72% when it rains....
iv pump alarm

Local RN Reprograms IV Pump Alarm to Play Michael Bolton; Patients No Longer Report...

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BUFFALO, NY - When one hears the epithet "problem solver," one recalls the inventors of Duct Tape, Ativan, Propofol, and Discharged AMA.  Today, at...
musical chairs

New Musical Chairs Discharge Protocol Fun & Effective

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NEW YORK, NY - Is your hospital filled to the gills?  With patients sicker than ever, are discharges few and far between?  Things may...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...

Music Therapy: Gomerblog’s COVID-19 Doomsday Playlist

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One of my friends with Palliative Care started this, thank goodness... and I got obsessed with it. I think we all need this. What...

Eminem Conference Brings Together Morbidity, Mortality & Hip-Hop

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DETROIT, MI - Yesterday’s sold-out Eminem conference at Detroit Medical Center went down as one of the greatest lunchtime conferences in history, with American...