Doctors Still Unclear Why Right Said Fred So Sexy It Hurts

15
LONDON, ENGLAND - Despite a battery of noninvasive and invasive diagnostic tests, doctors at London Medical Center remain puzzled, as they are still unclear why...
Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Intern

Learn the Lyrics to “Rudolph the Brown-Nosed Intern”

0
Are you ready to sing along to this Christmas classic?!  MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Intro You know Thomas and Becky and Patrick and Vicki Connie and Colin and...

Justin Timberlake: I’m Bringing Measles Baaaack

0
Recently Justin Timberlake announced to the world that he is not planning to vaccinate his child.  Evidently all the scientific evidence looks different behind...

“Bieber Fever” Determined to Be Neurosyphilis

0
CAMBRIDGE, MA – Scientists have been investigating an outbreak that has been sweeping over the world the past several years that has been coined...

Chaplain Bon Jovi’s Advice: “We’re Halfway There, WHOA, Livin’ on a Prayer!!”

0
SAYREVILLE, NJ - Asked to comment on life at Slippery When Wet Medical Center (SWWMC), hospital chaplain Jon Bon Jovi looked at his patient list and...

Local Doctors Refuse to Take Care of Nickelback, Cite Do No Harm

6
DETROIT, MI - On Saturday at 3:14 p.m., Nickelback’s tour bus crashed into a herd of rouge elephants that had escaped from the now abandoned Detroit City...
physical therapy

PT Asks Patient to “Walk Like an Egyptian”

0
ATHENS, GA - In breaking rehabilitation news this morning, Athens Medical Center physical therapist (PT) Susanna Hoffs has just asked her deconditioned 89-year-old patient in...
Daft Punk

Daft Punk Gets Unlucky, Catches Gonorrhea

0
PARIS, FRANCE - Known for their repeated declarations of "We're up all night to get lucky," French electronic music duo Daft Punk have unfortunately...
femurs

Orthopod Uses Patient’s Femurs to Play the Drums

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Orthopedic surgeon Jake Crusher came home today supremely excited: it was his day off and he just bought a brand new...
CDC The Cure Friday I'm in Love

CDC Announces “It’s Friday, I’m in Love!!”

0
ATLANTA, GA - After informing Thursday that it didn't care about it, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has happily announced that...