Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself

0
AUSTIN, TX - A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits to taking care of his vinyl records better than himself,...

The Difference Between a Pianist and a Penis

0
In this series, Gomerblog delves deep into two things often mistaken for one another and helps sort out their differences in order to help...

“Bieber Fever” Determined to Be Neurosyphilis

0
CAMBRIDGE, MA – Scientists have been investigating an outbreak that has been sweeping over the world the past several years that has been coined...
Daft Punk

Daft Punk Gets Unlucky, Catches Gonorrhea

0
PARIS, FRANCE - Known for their repeated declarations of "We're up all night to get lucky," French electronic music duo Daft Punk have unfortunately...
iv pump alarm

Local RN Reprograms IV Pump Alarm to Play Michael Bolton; Patients No Longer Report...

31
BUFFALO, NY - When one hears the epithet "problem solver," one recalls the inventors of Duct Tape, Ativan, Propofol, and Discharged AMA.  Today, at...

Hospital Gets Sexy as Overhead Speakers Start Playing a Little Marvin Gaye

0
ATLANTA, GA - Time to slow things down... real… slow… and heat things up.  There’s a different feeling in the air at Georgia Medical...

Milli Vanilli No Longer Blames It on the Rain, Blames Anesthesia Instead

0
MUNICH, GERMANY - German R&B group Milli Vanilli is back in the spotlight.  After decades of purporting the theory that we should just "blame...

Chaplain Bon Jovi’s Advice: “We’re Halfway There, WHOA, Livin’ on a Prayer!!”

0
SAYREVILLE, NJ - Asked to comment on life at Slippery When Wet Medical Center (SWWMC), hospital chaplain Jon Bon Jovi looked at his patient list and...

Conrad Murray Hired Promoting Exclusive Anesthesia Use for Propofol

2
HOUSTON, TX – Dr. Conrad Murray, a smooth criminal, has been released from jail following his two-year sentence for the death of Michael Jackson.  He has been unable to...
guitar

Clinical Scenarios & Songs That Pair Well Together

0
We all know about performing CPR to The Bee Gees’ Stayin’ Alive.  That got us thinking: Maybe we should think of songs for other...