physical therapy

PT Asks Patient to “Walk Like an Egyptian”

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ATHENS, GA - In breaking rehabilitation news this morning, Athens Medical Center physical therapist (PT) Susanna Hoffs has just asked her deconditioned 89-year-old patient in...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...

Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself

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AUSTIN, TX - A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits to taking care of his vinyl records better than himself,...

BREAKING: Z Dogg MD Not Related to Snoop Dogg

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Unfortunately it appears that this theory was concocted after drinking too much Gin and Juice and must now be dropped like it is hot and allowed to lay low.
pot of coffee

Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...

Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...

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LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.”  Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...
Bell Biv Devoe

Toxicologist Bell Biv DeVoe Confirms: ‘That Girl is Poison’

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BOSTON, MA - After "sensing something strange in my mind" for a few days now, Boston emergency physician and toxiciologist Dr. Bell Biv DeVoe has...
musical chairs

New Musical Chairs Discharge Protocol Fun & Effective

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NEW YORK, NY - Is your hospital filled to the gills?  With patients sicker than ever, are discharges few and far between?  Things may...

Happy Birthday, Aretha! A Gomerblog Tribute

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And now a rare piece of news that is not about COVID-19: On March 25, 1942, the Queen of Soul, Aretha Franklin, was born....

Justin Timberlake: I’m Bringing Measles Baaaack

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Recently Justin Timberlake announced to the world that he is not planning to vaccinate his child.  Evidently all the scientific evidence looks different behind...