Local Doctors Refuse to Take Care of Nickelback, Cite Do No Harm
DETROIT, MI - On Saturday at 3:14 p.m., Nickelback’s tour bus crashed into a herd of rouge elephants that had escaped from the now abandoned Detroit City...
Doctors Still Unclear Why Right Said Fred So Sexy It Hurts
LONDON, ENGLAND - Despite a battery of noninvasive and invasive diagnostic tests, doctors at London Medical Center remain puzzled, as they are still unclear why...
Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”
MIAMI, FL - All right stop! Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...
Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself
AUSTIN, TX - A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits to taking care of his vinyl records better than himself,...
Psych Agrees: “It’s Just Another Manic Monday”
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Well, the weekend is over and it's the start of a new work week. For Tulane psychiatrist Curtis Loder, his...
Patient Laudy Daughty Seen Partying with Snoop Dogg, Not Causing Any Trouble and Not...
LOS ANGELES, CA – Dr. Kimbell said, “I’m not concerned because when he rocks the mic he rocks the mic right.” Mr. Daughty’s endocrinologist...
CDC Announces “It’s Friday, I’m in Love!!”
ATLANTA, GA - After informing Thursday that it didn't care about it, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has happily announced that...
Eminem Conference Brings Together Morbidity, Mortality & Hip-Hop
DETROIT, MI - Yesterday’s sold-out Eminem conference at Detroit Medical Center went down as one of the greatest lunchtime conferences in history, with American...
Milli Vanilli No Longer Blames It on the Rain, Blames Anesthesia Instead
MUNICH, GERMANY - German R&B group Milli Vanilli is back in the spotlight. After decades of purporting the theory that we should just "blame...
Gastroenterologist Discovers Advanced Colonoscopy Technique, Twerk Position, While Working on Miley Cyrus
ANAHEIM, CA - Dr. Dan Abernath, known as the gastroenterologist to the stars, submitted a paper to Gastroenterology, describing a new advanced colonoscopy technique...