Administrator Bestows Upon Nurse the Highest Honor in the Land: Kudos
HOUSTON, TX - On his mighty steed, hospital administrator Sir Chaz Moneybags galloped onto the med-surg unit at Ben Taub Hospital and in front of the legions present in their humble white coats and scrubs...
CCU Staff Tests Limit of Foley Bag, Bomb Robot Deployed to Empty It
WASHINGTON, DC - The product insert in the Foley kits at George Washington hospital claim that the bags will hold up to five liters of urine. Critical care unit (CCU) nurse Joe Samuels decided...
Attending Answers Telephone at Nurse’s Station, Immediately Regrets Decision
IOWA CITY, IA - Havoc struck the medical ICU this morning when 49 year old intensivist Oliver Reynolds inexplicably decided to answer a telephone at the nurses station, immediately regretting his decision. "The caller...
Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized by a temporary mental lapse, and now formally recommend Gas-X...
Breaking: Urinary Bladder Placed on Trial for Voiding
ATLANTA, GA - "This voiding trial has begun!" Judge Emerson Rhodes III told a full-capacity, overly-distended courtroom in downtown Atlanta as he called order with his gavel at 8:45 AM this morning.
In what is...
Skeleton Started on IV Fluids, Was Bone Dry
ST. LOUIS, MO - Dr. Shaw just admitted a difficult case at Washington University. "I just admitted this bag of bones literally 2 hours ago," hospitalist Dr. Shaw told reporters. "Something just spoke to...
Sexy Nurse to Dress as Regular Nurse for Halloween
ST. LOUIS, MO - Sexy nurse Bessie Seductiva says that Halloween is her absolute favorite holiday of the year, which is why she is going to change things up and trade in her routine...
Doctor to Hand Out Metformin for Halloween
HOUSTON, TX – Local physician Dr. Sharma plans to hand out “Fun-Size” packages of metformin this Halloween.
“Pretty much every child develops diabetes on November 1st after a successful trick-or-treating. I’ll being doing their hearts...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the Dallas Cowboys: biggest fanciest toys inside the OR and out....
Hospital Safety: Fire Marshall Bill Edition
Fire Marshall Bill Burns taught us valuable lessons in safety for 5 years. This one in the hospital was none other than the best. All possible outcomes are covered so take a moment and...