Nursing

ChooseMyPlate.gov Updates Plate Portions for Nurses, Docs

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WASHINGTON, DC - The USDA website ChooseMyPlate.gov has updated its plate for all hospital personnel to remind them that while finding your healthy eating...
call button nursing lockout interval

Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”

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MIAMI, FL - All right stop!  Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center...
colonoscopy

New ACS Recommendations for CRC Screening Forces Anesthesia to Bear the Burden of Providing...

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On May 30, 2018, the American Cancer Society announced that it will be updating its colorectal cancer screening guideline such that all adults age...
aorta

Blood Sample Spontaneously Unhemolyzes Because Nurse Asks Nicely

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Sources from a local hospital are reporting a miracle, after a sample received by the laboratory spontaneously unhemolyzed following a discussion...
incentive spirometer incentivized spirometer

A Step-by-Step Guide on How to Use Incentive Spirometers (or Marijuana)

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Is this your first time using an incentive spirometer (or marijuana)?  Well, you're in luck: our Gomerblog team has created this easy 15-step process...
Joint Commission scissors

Joint Commission Requires More Name Tag Bracelets for Sicker Patients

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PHOENIX, AZ - In an effort to improve patient safety, the Joint Commission (JC) has recommended that sicker ICU patients should have multiple nametag...

New “Code 7/19” Intubation Protocol Keeps Day Nurse Around to Finish Sstorm He Started

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The time is 1859 and pagers throughout the ICU begin to chirp. It’s time: Tube O’clock. This simple and easy protocol was designed to...
Foley, bloodbath

Patient Can’t Wait to Yank Out Foley, Cause Bloodbath

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ATLANTA, GA - In exciting news today, patient Arnold Starks has announced that later today he will yank out his Foley with "full force...
graham crackers

97% of World’s Graham Cracker Supply Located in Hospital Drawers, White Coat Pockets

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BOUND BROOK, NJ - A study in the latest issue of the New England Journal of Snack Foods (NEJSF) has confirmed that 97% of...
TLC

Sign Out: Patient Just Needs a Little TLC

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ATLANTA, GA - A patient is transferring out of the medical intensive care unit today and, according to the MICU team, "just needs a...