Nursing

nurse prison

Nurses Visit Local Jail To See What Freedom Looks Like

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NEBRASKA - The nurses of University of Midwest Hospital recently visited Cook County jail to see what freedom looks like. They were shocked to...

Daughter of Patient Shocked to Discover There Are Other Patients On the Floor

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HAYS, KS - Earlier today Ellie Opter was flabbergasted upon the realization that there were other people on the medical floor that her mother...
wound care don't care

Exhausted RN to Go Home with Home Health Services

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FORT MYERS, FL - Deconditioned, weak, and perpetually hypoglycemic from such a prolonged hospital shift, exhausted RN Catherine Weal will be sent home with...
blood products

Blood Bank to Require More Paperwork, First-Born Child to Release Blood Products

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GREENSBORO, NC - In an effort to cut down on costly blood product utilization, hospital administrators at Rocky High Hospital have put pressure on...
aorta

Blood Sample Spontaneously Unhemolyzes Because Nurse Asks Nicely

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Sources from a local hospital are reporting a miracle, after a sample received by the laboratory spontaneously unhemolyzed following a discussion...
types of beards

New Beard Policy Being Adopted at Many Hospitals in OR Clothing Algorithm

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Dear Hospital Employees, The following beard policy is being put into effect for your entire hospital.  This includes parking areas, food courts, and adjacent land.  We...
geriatric fellowship

Snoop Dogg Completes Geriatrics Fellowship

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LONG BEACH, CA - After seemingly vanishing from the public eye for over a decade, former rapper Calvin "Snoop Dogg" Broadus announced that he...

Mooch: G*ddamn Goals of Care Talk Went F**king Fabulous

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Former White House communications director Anthony "The Mooch" Scaramucci has told Gomerblog that an impromptu family meeting and "g*ddamn" goals of...

Massachusetts Nurses Union Urges Mandatory 3 Nurses to 1 Patient Ratio to Boost Lagging...

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BOSTON, MA – When Massachusetts voters head to the polls next week, the first question they will face is whether or not to initiate...
urine catheter

Forgot-to-Pee Syndrome Afflicting Millions of Health Care Workers

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WASHINGTON, DC - The Journal of the American National Society, Committee, and Association of Urinary Retention and Other Things Too (JANSCAUROTT) estimates that nearly...