Nursing

hospital workers

Hospital Workers Can’t Think of Any Other Place They’d Rather Be on Thanksgiving Day

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EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital workers eagerly awoke this morning, ready and energized to take on another thrilling work day at their local hospitals.  The fact...
caps lock

NURSE SUSPENDED FOR WRITING NOTES IN CAPS LOCK

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NORFOLK, VA - NURSE AMANDA HAN WAS SUSPENDED EARLY THIS MORNING BY HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATION FOR THE SAME OFFENSE YET AGAIN: ALWAYS WRITING HER NOTES...
hospital administrator golfing

A Modern Hippocratic Oath for Hospital Administrators

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Going forward, I swear to fulfill, to the best of my ability and judgment, this cost-saving and value-added covenant: I am an agent of change...

Entire OR Team Kneels During Timeout to Protest Administrators

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GREEN BAY, WI - In a stunning turn of events, entire OR teams including Anesthesia kneeled today during all surgical timeouts today at Bellin...
angry man

Tips: How to Manage Your Pent-Up, Work-Related Rage

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Many jobs, in particular ones involving working at the hospital, have a certain way of… how do you say… taking you there.  One of the...

Sexy Ebola Nurses Released from 45-Day Quarantine

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MOBRIDGE, SD - The nation breathed a sigh of relief today as hordes of sexy Ebola nurses were released from the place of quarantine...

AMA Admits ‘We Are in the Pocket of Big Oxygen,’ Issues Formal Apology to...

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Anti-vaxxers, conspiracy theorists, naturalists, you had it right all along. Our rampant greed as medical providers knows no bounds. You have called us out...
doctorate of nursing

Nurse Raises the Post-Nominal Letter Bar

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PORTLAND, OR - Nurse Ruth Scrittle, ASN, BSN, MSN, DNP, RN, MBA, CEN, ACLS, CENP, FAEN, is actively petitioning to have additional letters added...
CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

New CDC Recommendation: Ignore Patients with Pain > 4

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ATLANTA, GA - The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has issued a new recommendation on the heels of March's "CDC Guideline for...

New Nurse Surgeon General Unsure Who To Page About Nation’s Slightly Abnormal Magnesium Level

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Office of the Surgeon General was thrown into chaos late last night when newly-appointed Acting Surgeon General Rear Admiral Sylvia...