Phillips to Introduce Monitor that Only Alarms
DALLAS, TX - Today Phillips unveiled their mew monitor: Alarmtron 3000. This new monitor is the next step in evolution from the previous generation...
New Beard Policy Being Adopted at Many Hospitals in OR Clothing Algorithm
Dear Hospital Employees,
The following beard policy is being put into effect for your entire hospital. This includes parking areas, food courts, and adjacent land. We...
October 16, 2015: National Toss Your Pager in the Trash Day
Finally. Pagers are on their way out for good!
To the delight of physicians, physician assistants, nurse practitioners, nurses, and any other health care provider who...
Piggy Bank in OR After Gruesome Attack with Hammer
ATLANTA, GA - Trauma surgeons at Grady Memorial Hospital, one of Georgia's Level I Trauma Centers, are working around the clock to piece back...
Inventor of Slogan ‘Pain is the 5th Vital Sign’ Now Concedes Pain is Actually...
NEW YORK, NY - Last night, in an emotional interview with Dateline NBC, Lisa Washington, who famously coined the term "Pain is the 5th Vital...
New Littmann Stethoscope Allows You to Hear One’s Thoughts
ST. PAUL, MN - Manufacturer 3M has released a new Littman Mind-Reading I Stethoscope for health care practitioners to help diagnose someone else’s thoughts,...
Rookie Mistake: July Intern Grabs Cup of Decaf Coffee, Defeats the Purpose Entirely
NASHVILLE, TN - In a situation that can be described in no other way but shocking, neophyte July intern Elena Sanchez grabbed a cup...
Online Doctorate of Nursing University Under Review as a Possible Scam
WASHINGTON, DC - The University of Online Degrees (UOD) is under investigation by the FBI regarding their online Doctorate of Nursing program for being...
Hospital to Replace Clipboard Nurses with iPad Nurses
SEATTLE, WA - Greater Seattle Memorial Hospital announced plans earlier today to replace its clipboard nurses with iPad nurses. Specifically, senior-level nursing personnel who...