Nursing

Nervous Rituals Now Billable As Preventative Care

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HEAVERNER, OK - Luck of the Draw Medical Center (LDMC) has been featured on GomerBlog before because of porcelain bedpan incantations proven to ward off bad luck on full moon Friday the 13ths.  However, these extreme...
loser health care job

This Just In: Your Health Care Job Sucks

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Hey YOU, that’s right, I’m talking to you. Gomerblog just wanted to take some time to let you know that your job sucks. Really. It’s terrible. I know you’ve worked for years to be...

Elderly Male Patient Enjoying Foley Catheter, Refuses Removal

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SPANISH FORT, AL - South Hospital has taken a brave step to become latex free by 2016.  The board voted to replace the soft, elastic, flexible urinary foley catheters with a latex-free alternative. “I was worried by...
printer toner

Printer at Nurses Station Celebrates Its 10th Straight Year without Toner

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NASHVILLE, TN - Congratulations!  Today, the printer labelled prntr04 at the fourth floor nurses station in Saint Thomas Midtown Hospital is celebrating its 10th straight year without any toner. "Today is truly a momentous occasion, we cannot...
doctorate of nursing

Nurse Wins Postnomial Abbreviation Pokémon, Catches ‘em All!

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El Cajon, CA- When Denise Spense RN, BSN, MSN, FNP, DNP, MHNP, PNP, BLS, ACLS, PALS, ATLS, OCCN, CCRN, MBA, MPH, MHA, LPN, CRNA, GED, BFD, JK, LOL was a freshman in college she...
nutcracker, OR

Urology to Use Nutcracker in OR During the Holidays

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TOPEKA, KS – Urologists at Mercy Hospital have announced plans to perform surgery with the help of an 8-foot-tall wooden nutcracker during the holiday season.  David Drosselmeyer, Chief of Urology, could barely contain his...
easter egg hunt human orifices

Record Number of Drug Seekers Expected for Annual Easter Dilaudid Hunt

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BALDWIN, NY - The Easter Dilaudid Hunt at Baldwin Medical Center (BMC) is going all out.  This weekend, 30,000 drug seekers are expected to show up for a chance to find 1 of 5...
signout mood graph

New Infographic Depicts the Mood of Two People Signing Out to One Another

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JACKSON HOLE, WY - After observing thousands of signouts over the past 12 months, Gomerblog has constructed a graph depicting the mood of health care professionals depending on their role during the signout process....
TLC

Sign Out: Patient Just Needs a Little TLC

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ATLANTA, GA - A patient is transferring out of the medical intensive care unit today and, according to the MICU team, "just needs a little TLC" before being discharged home. "Say no more," said hospitalist...