Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease
NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases." Unfortunately,...
Resident Tempts Fate, Sits Down at Nursing Computer
JACKSONVILLE, FL – Greg Schmidt, an internal medicine resident at Mercy Hospital put his career in danger earlier this week when he chose to...
Hospital Administrators Think High Healthcare Costs Fixed by Hiring More Hospital Administrators
WASHINGTON, DC - CEOs of major US hospitals are breaking their silence and coming out in favor of hiring more hospital administrators. CEO of...
Hospital Publishes 6 Patient Guidelines: ‘Please Try Not to Confuse Us with a Hotel’
Here at Outside Hospital (OSH), we are 100% committed to your satisfaction as a patient. To this end, we have created this pamphlet, which...
Haldol Blowdart Halted in Phase 3 Clinical Trial Due to ‘Safety Concerns’
MORRISTOWN, NJ - Recognizing the mounting need for new and creative ways to quickly administer haloperidol (a typical antipsychotic drug) to that “difficult” patient, Big...
April Fools! This Nurse Was Assigned Only 1 New Admit, Turns Out It Was...
SACRAMENTO, CA - When Nurse Shannon came to work today, she was assigned to only one admit. "Are we slow?" Shannon thought as to...
Hospital Administrators Sick of Dealing with Clumsy Nurses and Nursing Injuries
HARTFORD, CT - "Seriously, another back injury claim?" questioned hospital administrator Lawrence Gates. "Why do our clumsy nurses always go and hurt themselves on...
OR Case Canceled Due to No Remaining Time Outs
The first case of the day at Saint Methodist Maplewood hospital was canceled due to no remaining time outs prior to incision.
Circulator, Renee Count...
New CPR Guidelines Recommend Switching Out Providers Every 5 Cycles to Update Facebook Status
ST. LOUIS, MO – The American Heart Association (AHA) conducted further research and has published the new 2014 recommendations for cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR). Basic Life...
Nurse Assigned to Shake Empty Toner Cartridge Every 5 Minutes
LOUISVILLE, KY - As punishment for not charting a respiratory rate other than 16, first-year nurse Randy Tolbert has been relegated from patient care...