Hospital Replaces Crash Carts with Snack Carts
MARIETTA, GA – Goodbye defibrillators and hello Swedish Fish! In a rare display of unity, hospital administrators and health care personnel at Marietta Medical...
NY/NJ Ebola Algorithm for People with Recent Travel to Africa
* We truly appreciate you risking your life to treat dying people... just stay away from us. *
** Free to leave includes taking mass...
Pain Clinic Unveils New ‘Methadrone’ Delivery
TALLAHASSEE, FL - A new cutting-edge system for delivery of maintenance narcotics was unveiled in the Florida panhandle last month, as Our Lady of the Weeping...
Contact Precautions Stethoscope Will Be Replaced With Drawing of Stethoscope
CHARLESTON, SC - In an effort to cut down on cost and auscultation, hospitals are deciding to change to a illustrated picture of a...
Code Blue Also Code Brown
NEW YORK, NY – According to multiple sources in attendance at, or rapidly emerging from, the cardiopulmonary resuscitation currently underway in room 1214, the...
Breaking: Nurse Initiates Lesser-Known Chloride Repletion Protocol
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Nurse Jess Casamento of Ochsner Medical Center is one of the best when it comes to repleting electrolytes: potassium, magnesium, even...
Repeatedly Yelling “NURSE!!!” Less Effective Than Using Call Bell, Study Finds
A new study published in The Lancet shows that using the call bell to get your nurse’s attention is 25% more effective than repeatedly...
Brothel Workers Consulted in Patient Satisfaction Project
RENO, NV - In what is being called a "fresh" and "unorthodox" effort to boost patient satisfaction survey scores, Heart of The Valley Hospital...
Prima Donna Surgeon Can’t be Bothered to Dress Self
AUGUSTA, GA – Saying they are “sick and tired” of waiting on surgeons hand and foot (mostly hands), operating room nurses at nearby Mercy...
Study Finds Needle Anxiety Worsens with Tattoos
BALTIMORE, MD - Johns Hopkins researchers published a shocking new study in this month's New England Journal of Medicine showing a correlation between the...