Nursing

Mooch: G*ddamn Goals of Care Talk Went F**king Fabulous

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Former White House communications director Anthony "The Mooch" Scaramucci has told Gomerblog that an impromptu family meeting and "g*ddamn" goals of...

Charmin Profits As July Interns Sh*t Themselves

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GREEN BAY, WI - Proctor & Gamble's toilet paper brand Charmin expects to see profits soar throughout July as new interns flood hospitals in a blazing...
anatomy, Independence Day

Patriotic Call Lights, Pagers to Play National Anthem

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WASHINGTON, DC - For those patients and providers in the nation's hospitals today, new special edition patriotic call lights, IV pumps, and pagers are...
doctor and patient

Doctors & Nurses Agree: Everyone Is a Poor Historian

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ATLANTA, GA - Frustrated because you can’t get the details you want from a patient?  Don’t worry, you’re not the only one.  A recent...

Game of Thrones Pain Scale

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Are you like me and tired of giving the same old boring explanation of the 0-10 pain scale?  Spice it up by using the...
nurse helping

Study Shows ‘Hold On, I’ll Get Your Nurse’ Most Common Phrase Doctors Say to...

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A new survey published this month reveals the sentence “Hold on, I’ll get your nurse” to be the most common thing doctors say to...
potluck

Top 10 Ways to Get Invited to the Nurses’ Infamous Potluck Dinners

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Physicians, if you haven’t heard of or been to some of the nurses’ break room potluck dinners you probably aren’t doing any of the...

STAT Officially Means “Maybe”

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
Hilton Hospital

New Burger King and Hilton Hospital to Open

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CHICAGO, IL - Burger King and Hilton have merged together and plan to finish construction shortly on a new state of the art hotel,...

Study Shows Direct Relationship Between Teddy Bear Size and Dilaudid Dose

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ATLANTA, GA - A cute, little, fuzzy study published today in the New England Journal of Stuffed Animals (NEJSA) has revealed something that healthcare...