Nursing

CDC headquarters, ignore, sit-up, sit-ups, anti-vaxxer cooties, pictures 2,300 words, eat sh*t and die, hypodermic needles, bed bugs, vanco, Zosyn, Lego, flu shot, exhalation, baseline, Vaseline, scabies

CDC Advises Robert De Niro To Be Sent To Jail Until Deemed Safe

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ATLANTA, GA - Last week Robert De Niro pushed for the Andrew Wakefield (yes, that Wakefield) film Vaxxed to be screened.  "We need to have the...
angry nurse

Book Review: Chicken Soup For the Bitter Angry Nurse’s Soul

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Chicken Soup for the Soul has released a new book catering solely to the bitter, angry nurse. The franchise's latest installment focuses on personal...
ticks as phlebotomist

Ticks to Assist Phlebotomists With Patients Who Are Tough IV Sticks

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There are many examples of animal helpers in healthcare. Examples range from assistance dogs to even modern day leeches that provide anti-coagulation to surgical...

Medical Subspecialties as Star Wars Characters

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The release of Rogue One: A Star Wars Story is upon us. Before we re-watch Episodes I through VII in our respective break and...

Massachusetts ICU Nurse Wins Powerball, Uses Patient’s Vital Signs as Lucky Numbers

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CAMBRIDGE, MA - Local ICU nurse Debbie Watson called in rich this morning after winning the historic Powerball. When nobody claimed a the Powerball winnings...

SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover

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DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...

Elderly Male Patient Enjoying Foley Catheter, Refuses Removal

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SPANISH FORT, AL - South Hospital has taken a brave step to become latex free by 2016.  The board voted to replace the soft, elastic,...
printer toner

Printer at Nurses Station Celebrates Its 10th Straight Year without Toner

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NASHVILLE, TN - Congratulations!  Today, the printer labelled prntr04 at the fourth floor nurses station in Saint Thomas Midtown Hospital is celebrating its 10th straight...
hospital gown ass crack

CDC Recommends Not Tying Gown in Back to Promote Airflow Through Ass Crack

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ATLANTA, GA - After a thorough review of the evidence, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) will make the formal recommendation that...