Nursing

the view

Patient Leaps to Death After Hospital TV Stuck on The View, Joint Commission Investigating

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OMAHA, NE - Burpelson Hospital is investigating the apparent suicide of patient Grover Downs on the 13-East psychiatric unit.  Mr. Downs, an 84-year-old man...

Doctor Wins Lottery: Patient List Free of Jerks, A**holes

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NEW YORK, NY - Internal medicine physician Damien Sharp won the medical equivalent of a lottery jackpot today: his patient list is completely devoid...

Nurses Have Stethoscopes: What Do You Think?

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The philosophical TV show, The View, recently discussed the recent Miss America pageant. Two of the hosts were very critical of Miss Colorado with...
physician on toilet paper coffee sit-to-sh*t 29 seconds

Gastroenterologist Paged Record 35 Times While in Restroom

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KANSAS CITY, MO - In a stark development it has been reported that earlier this morning during a five-minute bathroom break, Dr. Timothy McFadden, a...
disposable colonoscope

Product Review: Melch Allyn’s Disposable Colonoscopes

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Pros / You don't have to worry about those hard-to-remove stains like on reusable colonoscopes because the Melch Allyn Disposable Colonoscope can be thrown...

Shaq Mistakes Male Nurse for a Murse

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MIAMI, FL – Shaquille O’Neil held a public relations press conference yesterday explaining what led him to carry around a grown man for almost a week. "I...
dick prick urologist urology

Short on Wound VACs, Surgeon Slaps On Hoover

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Nearing completion of the debridement of an infected wound but learning that the hospital was short on wound VACs, University...
styrofoam stetoscope

Styrofoam Cup Outperforms Crappy Disposable Stethoscope

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ABSTRACT Given the increased proliferation of multidrug resistant (MDR) microorganisms, it is considered standard of care to use patient-dedicated, disposable, or “crappy” stethoscopes to prevent...

Today is National Destroy Your Pyxis with a Sledgehammer Day

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SILVER SPRING, MD - Nurses, it’s time to rejoice!  The American Nurses Association (ANA) has officially declared today National Destroy Your Pyxis with a...