Mandatory Rectal Tone Checks Reduce Non-Emergent ER Visits
NEWARK, NJ - Grace Regional's ER physicians complained to leadership for years about the excess number of patients going to the ER for non-emergent...
Repeatedly Yelling “NURSE!!!” Less Effective Than Using Call Bell, Study Finds
A new study published in The Lancet shows that using the call bell to get your nurse’s attention is 25% more effective than repeatedly...
Patients on Contact Precautions in Hospital, Now Required to Have Yellow Cart Outside of...
PHILADELPHIA, PA - A new mandate was recently passed that now requires ALL patients that were in contact precautions in the hospital, must have...
Slow-A** Da Vinci Holds Up Lines, Taking Forever to Vote
WASHINGTON, DC - The Da Vinci Surgical Robot is proudly exercising his right to vote this Election Day, but here's the problem: he's slow...
Code Blue Also Code Brown
NEW YORK, NY – According to multiple sources in attendance at, or rapidly emerging from, the cardiopulmonary resuscitation currently underway in room 1214, the...
Tips for Patients: How to Use a Call Light
Nurses are incredibly busy. And by busy we mean doing endless charting. So much so that they're contractually not allowed to eat or urinate....
Special Pyxis to Dispense American Flags & Flair
FROM SEA TO SHINING SEA, AMERICA - Hospitals and clinics across this great land of ours will be using special Pyxis machines to dispense American...
PA Furious for Being Mistaken for Nurse, Struggles to Explain She’s Not a Physician
CHICAGO, IL - Physician assistant (PA) Susan Jonesby was doing morning discharge planning for her employer Galen-Vaselius Orthopaedics when tragedy of unimaginable proportions ruined...
Doctors and Nurses Form ‘The Gigantic Commission’ to Accredit The Joint Commission
SAN DIEGO, CA - With recent concerns over the credentials of employees of The Joint Commission (JC), doctors and nurses have formed a separate regulating...