Doctor Trespasses into Nurses Station, Shot on Sight
NORFOLK, VA - Internist Jeff Jenkins is face down and comatose on the fourth floor of Norfolk Medical Center after being shot in the...
ER Hires ‘Dilaudid Nazi’ to Dispense (or Not) Dispense Opioids
ATLANTA, GA - The famous "Soup Nazi" from Seinfeld has been hired by Memorial Hospital’s ER to dispense or not dispense opioids to patients checking...
The Michael Jordan of Interns Retires After Curing His 6th Patient
CLEVELAND, OH - We all know Dr. Mark Jeffries by now. He is the Michael Jordan of interns. Setting records by storm, Jeffries has set the...
“Rewards” Program for Frequent Flyers Includes Unlimited, Complimentary Discharges
ATLANTA, GA - Atlanta University Hospital (AUH) has unveiled a new tiered hospital rewards program for frequent flyers that provides numerous benefits, including free...
Five-Second Rule Validated in the Operating Room
CHICAGO, IL - In a paradigm shift for the operating room, a new study has found that reusing instruments dropped on the operating room...
New Medical Unit Quiet Hours Now From 3 PM to 2:59 PM
NASHVILLE, TN - In an effort to provide much needed peace and quiet for the medical staff, Unit 4G at Nashville Memorial Hospital has...
The Joint Commission Now Encourages Coffee At Nursing Stations, Mortality Rates Plummet
The Joint Commission (JC) has abruptly reversed their ban on caffeinated drinks at physician and nursing workstations in light of new evidence that caffeine...
Spooky: Pyxis Swallows Nurse Whole, Rescue Underway
NEW YORK, NY - In unexpected and unfortunate news today, floor nurse Yelena Ivanovic was accidentally swallowed by her Pyxis machine shortly after engaging...
Shaq Mistakes Male Nurse for a Murse
MIAMI, FL – Shaquille O’Neil held a public relations press conference yesterday explaining what led him to carry around a grown man for almost a week.
"I...
Seasoned ICU Nurse Forces Interns to Hand Over Computer Password to Correctly Enter Orders
CHATTANOOGA, TN – Veteran ICU nurse, Susan Billings, has been working in the ICU for over 25 years now and she is fed up with inaccurate...