Pharmacy

dilaudid

Report: Nurse on 3rd Floor Excited to Give 0.1 mg of Dilaudid

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CHICAGO, IL – Local nurse Melissa Jacobson’s shift just got better when she noticed what was written for pain medication on her patient. “Oh,...
unicorn

Investigation Reveals Dilaudid Manufactured From Unicorn Tears

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Reports from a three year long undercover investigation reveal that Pharmagen has been manufacturing dilaudid using a tremendous volume of unicorn tears. The 3,000...
nystatin statin

Dammit, It’s a Ruse! Nystatin Isn’t a Statin After All

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BETHESDA, MD - The medical world is at a loss for words after scientists at the National Institute of Health (NIH) dropped the megaton...

Pharmacist Struggling to Calculate Dinner Tip

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OCEANSIDE, NY - Inpatient pharmacist Mark Donato, beloved and trusted by his fellow physicians and other medical providers for being able to “dose anything,”...

Drug Prices Outta Control: Man Spends 3 Months’ Salary on Vaginal Contraceptive Ring for...

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INTERCOURSE, PA—The great Beyoncé once never said, “If you didn’t want it, you shoulda put a ring in it.” As everyone surely doesn’t remember,...

Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters

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Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or...

RxCupid a New Dating Site for Patients

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PALO ALTO, CA - A new dating site has received its initial funding, called RxCupid.  The website tries to match the perfect patients together....
used speculum tongue depressor

Ten Spectacular Off-Label Uses of the Speculum

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You’re probably familiar with the traditional use of the speculum: visualization of the cervical os, blah blah blah.  We at Gomerblog are pleased to...

Patient Holding $1000 new iPhone X Very Upset About $5 Prescription CoPay

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LA JOLLA, CA – Natalia Miller could not understand what the idiots at the La Jolla Primary Care Clinic and Botox Salon didn’t get...
Gas-X brain farts

Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...