FDA approves first novel drug to treat medical burnout
TWISP, WA - The US Food and Drug Administration today approved Peaceaudi (Idongivafumab) injection for intravenous use for the treatment of medical burnout.
“Medical burnout...
Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...
Protamine Shortage Amid Strike at Salmon Sperm Acquisition Factory
DALLAS, TX - Add another to the list: protamine. This antidote to heparin is on national shortage and warnings are being issued to hospitals...
Fifth Season of Netflix’s ‘Narcos’ To Be Set In Washington, D.C.
SCOTTS VALLEY, CA - Seasons 1 through 3 chronicled the drug trade through Columbia, Season 4 is poised to go to Mexico, and it...
Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated
RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning. She found...
Nostalgic Pharmacists Yearn for Good ‘Ole Days of Illegible Doctors’ Prescriptions
NEW ORLEANS, LA - Though pharmacists appreciate the progress that has been made with electronic health records (EHR) and e-prescriptions over the past two...
New Drug Company “Big Pharma” releases full range of Placebos
Despite being one of the most studied medications there has never been a range of placebos released onto the market. The newly launched Pharmaceutical...
Doctorate of Pharmacy Programs to Add CVS, Walgreens Rewards Card Education Requirement
WASHINGTON, DC - As a result of successful congressional lobbying efforts by the “big corner drug store” lobby, doctorate of pharmacy programs nationwide will...
Patient Holding $1000 new iPhone X Very Upset About $5 Prescription CoPay
LA JOLLA, CA – Natalia Miller could not understand what the idiots at the La Jolla Primary Care Clinic and Botox Salon didn’t get...
Investigation Reveals Dilaudid Manufactured From Unicorn Tears
Reports from a three year long undercover investigation reveal that Pharmagen has been manufacturing dilaudid using a tremendous volume of unicorn tears. The 3,000...