Pharmacy

It’s Time for a Change: Pharmacists Tired of Being the Last Stop in a...

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CHARLESTON, SC - Pharmacists across the country are angry in regards to the pharmacy being the last stop in a patient’s day.  Typically, patients are exhausted when...
afternoon after

FDA Approves Afternoon-After Pill

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INTERCOURSE, PA - “Let’s face it: no one is getting up in the morning after an accident,” said a representative from the Food and Drug Administration...

Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated

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RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning.  She found...
staph staff

Staph Aureus Bacterium Ridiculed by for Still Being Sensitive to Methicillin

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A single, sad Staph Aureus bacterium has been shunned from its colony for still being sensitive to methicillin in the year 2019. “Apparently it didn’t...
Martin Shkreli

Things You Should Know About Martin Shkreli

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CEO of Turing Pharmaceuticals Martin Shkreli raised the price of Daraprim, a drug used in the treatment of toxoplasmosis, from $13.50 to $750 per...
salmon eggs

Protamine Shortage Amid Strike at Salmon Sperm Acquisition Factory

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DALLAS, TX - Add another to the list: protamine.  This antidote to heparin is on national shortage and warnings are being issued to hospitals...

Tips: How to Pronounce a Difficult Drug Name Without Choking, Aspirating, Dying

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Last month, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (“The” FDA) approved the efficacious and unpronounceable idarucizumab (also known, thankfully, as Praxbind) to reverse the...
wine pairs

Hospital Replaces Pharmacists with “Narcotic Sommeliers”

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SANTA CLARA, CA - A Bay Area hospital is making a bold move to improve patient satisfaction, as last week its staff pharmacists were...
pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...

New Drug Company “Big Pharma” releases full range of Placebos

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Despite being one of the most studied medications there has never been a range of placebos released onto the market. The newly launched Pharmaceutical...