Pharmacy

Controlled Substance Just Wants to Be Treated Like Other Substances

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PHARMACY, USA - “You know, I’m just like everyone else. I just want to be in the same classes, have the same schedule,” lamented...
used speculum tongue depressor

Ten Spectacular Off-Label Uses of the Speculum

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You’re probably familiar with the traditional use of the speculum: visualization of the cervical os, blah blah blah.  We at Gomerblog are pleased to...
pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...

Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated

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RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning.  She found...
Pyxis machine broken glass

Pyxis Machine Dispenses Broken Glass Dilaudid Ampule, Laughs on the Inside

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CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA - GomerBlog brings breaking news regarding those fragile glass fentanyl and Dilaudid ampules in the Pyxis machine.  Apparently the machine enjoys dispensing medications with a...
epinephrine

Patient Dies When Nurse Unable To Scan Epinephrine Vial at Code

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FORT WAYNE, IN - A nurse’s worst nightmare occurred tonight at Lincoln Memorial Hospital in Fort Wayne.  A code blue was called overhead and...

Shark Attack Victim Denied Narcotics

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PENSACOLA BEACH, FL - Skip Sanders alternated between spearfishing and surfing, depending on the waves.  Yesterday, an errant harpoon from his spear gun grazed...
crocodile moat

Red Line in Medication Room Replaced with Crocodile-Filled Moat

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BOSTON, MA - Any nurse who has dispensed medications knows the ubiquitous red line, in the medication room, near the Pyxis machine.  This is a...
couple kissing

Worst Pick-Up Lines by Medical Subspecialty

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GomerBlog did some research on a hot and steamy topic: What are the worst pick-up lines by subspecialty?  Here goes! Allergy “I like it when you...
wine pairs

Hospital Replaces Pharmacists with “Narcotic Sommeliers”

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SANTA CLARA, CA - A Bay Area hospital is making a bold move to improve patient satisfaction, as last week its staff pharmacists were...