Pharmacy

crocodile moat

Red Line in Medication Room Replaced with Crocodile-Filled Moat

0
BOSTON, MA - Any nurse who has dispensed medications knows the ubiquitous red line, in the medication room, near the Pyxis machine.  This is a...
multivitamins

New Multivitamin Cures Cancer, Heart Disease, Famine, Evil

20
SAN DIEGO, CA - A new miracle multivitamin released by pharmaceutical company Pfizer last month has taken the world by storm as it not...

Local Doctor Consults Sauron to Create the One Pill to Cure Them All

0
“I was at my wits’ end with these chronic pain patients,” Local doctor Fro Doe told reporters. “They keep coming in over and over...
pills

Makers of Dilaudid to Officially Change Name to ‘That One That Starts with a...

0
WASHINGTON, DC - In a stunning move the makers of Dilaudid (hydromorphone) have officially changed their product name to “That One That Starts with...

Patient Can’t Pronounce Metoprolol, Electively Intubated

0
RICHMOND, VA - Patient Mary Andrews, a 52-year-old female with atrial fibrillation tried to pronounce the beta blocker “metoprolol” earlier this morning.  She found...
Pharmacists playing poker

Hidden Camera in VA Pharmacy Shows Pharmacists Playing Poker Instead of Dispensing Drugs

1
HARTFORD, CT - Recent video footage of workers at Parkland VA Hospital’s pharmacy playing poker has surfaced and is now "going viral."  The hidden camera in...

Night Float Intern Boldly Chooses Non-Vanc/Zosyn Empiric Antibiotic Regimen

0
DALLAS, TX - Night calls can be a scary thing for new interns.  Everything from blood pressures of 170/80 and sleeping pill requests in...
unicorn

Investigation Reveals Dilaudid Manufactured From Unicorn Tears

0
Reports from a three year long undercover investigation reveal that Pharmagen has been manufacturing dilaudid using a tremendous volume of unicorn tears. The 3,000...
cancer drug

Meet Dilaudicillin the Groundbreaking New Narcotic/Antibiotic Combo that has Patient Satisfaction Scores Through the...

0
In the era of Press-Ganey scores, most physicians have finally accepted that they are essentially waiters whose job is to serve the every whim...
heparin bridge 85

I-85 in Atlanta is Finally Therapeutic, Heparin Bridge D/C’d

0
ATLANTA, GA - Gomerblog is excited to report that I-85 in Atlanta, which collapsed 6 weeks ago for reasons that can likely be blamed...