fetal position

Tips for New Interns: How to Curl into the Fetal Position

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We can certainly feel for all those interns starting this month: their minds are spinning and their cardiac rhythms are just shy of V-tach....
troponin bump

Intern Has Mild Troponin Bump Over Patient’s Mild Troponin Bump

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NASHVILLE, TN - After seeing her patient with chest pain develop a mild troponin bump up to 0.25 on this morning's set of labs,...
glove intern millionaire

Fancy Pants Intern Throws Away Spare Disposable Glove Like Some Kind of Millionaire

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PORTLAND, OR - In an audacious display of waste and privilege, new intern Thomas Donaldson simply threw away a perfectly good disposable glove in...
intern physician worth it

July Intern Looks Forward to Finding Out This Isn’t Worth It

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CHAPEL HILL, NC - University of North Carolina internal medicine intern Warren Burke is about to embark on a long and exciting road, and today...

New Ophthalmology Intern Not Sure How to Spell Ophthalmology

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IOWA CITY, IA - It was a rough start to the year for first-year ophthalmology resident Tony Beamer, who was recently caught trying to spell "ophthalmology," the name of...
spay neuter frightened favorite pen

Updated ACGME Guideline: Have Your New Intern Spayed, Neutered

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CHICAGO, IL - In an attempt to curb the difficult behaviors of new interns among other things, the Accreditation Council for Graduate Medical Education...
decaf coffee

Rookie Mistake: July Intern Grabs Cup of Decaf Coffee, Defeats the Purpose Entirely

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NASHVILLE, TN - In a situation that can be described in no other way but shocking, neophyte July intern Elena Sanchez grabbed a cup...
doctors teaching

GomerBlog’s Exhaustive List on How to Survive Internship

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Want to survive Internship? Follow these simple guidelines for success!! Page your attending and ask if it is ok to order Tylenol for a patient Use...

MRI Broken, Intern Forced to Hold Giant, Oversized Magnet

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BOSTON, MA - The MRI machine at Massachusetts General Hospital broke down today.  "We were really at a loss without an MRI in a...

Intern Put Into Timeout Cage to Think About What She Did

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EL PASO, TX - New medical intern Lilah Pepper was placed into a timeout cage by her team on rounds earlier today as punishment,...