Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

What Do Neurologists Really Put in Those Black Bags?

It’s a curious thing that we’ve all seen: neurologists going to the office or ...

Ortho Defeats Da Vinci in Good Ole Fashioned Arm-Wrestling Match

DURHAM, NC – An anticipated nail-biter that didn’t end up going the distance, orthopedic ...

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Report Recommends Lowering BAC Threshold to 0.05% for Drunk Texting

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In an effort to curb regret the morning after, the National ...

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CDC Mandates Life Preservers to Avoid Drowning in Paperwork

ATLANTA, GA – The result of an alarming increase in paperwork-associated deaths by drowning, ...

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Unsure What’s a Banana Bag, Pharmacist Just Bags a Bunch of Bananas

HONOLULU, HI – New pharmacist Aaron Prior-Auth admits he was flustered when nurse practitioner ...