Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

nervous system

Breaking: Nervous System, Like, Really Really Nervous Today

HUMAN BODY – Admitting openly that it has been a bucket of nerves since ...

med students drop out

Med Students Have All the Tools to Drop Out Before It’s Too Late

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Citing the current uncertain health care climate and emphasizing that the ...

FaceLyft

Lyft Offshoot FaceLyft Offers Patients Rides To, From Plastic Surgeons

SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Catering to the very specific niche of passengers needing rides ...

skeleton rearview mirror

Breaking News: 10 Bucks Says an Orthopod Drives This Car with a Skeleton Hanging from the Rearview Mirror

PITTSBURGH, PA – Okay, okay, breaking news into Gomerblog headquarters: a yellow convertible had ...

“This 1500-Calorie Diabetic Renal Diet is Delicious!” Said No One in the History of Health Care Ever

COAST-TO-COAST, AMERICA – “Well, I’ll be damned!  This low-fat, low-sodium, low-cholesterol, low-potassium, 1500-calorie, diabetic, and ...

lawn chairlawn chair

Psychiatrist Downsizes Psychiatry Couch to Crappy Lawn Chair

LOS ANGELES, CA – The direct result of budgetary cutbacks and an attempt to ...