Primary Care

homeopathy

Homeopath to Drug Seeker: ‘I Thought You Said Dilute It’

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SEATTLE, WA - Friday, local drug-seeker Garrett Ashton was reportedly shocked to learn that his Dilaudid was not available for pick-up, and in fact,...
upset mother

Mother Furious With OB Nurse Who Mispronounced Her Baby’s Name

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PORTLAND, OR - "Simply Outrageous!"  Those were comments on a patient survey card by a mother regarding an OB nurse at Mercy Care Hospital yesterday on the 6th floor. ...
vaccines

Big Pharma Admits They’re Just Trying to Kill Everybody with Vaccines

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In what is being hailed as a huge victory for the anti-vaccine movement, Big Pharma announced to the world today that they've...
health record on post it notes

Area Hospital to Implement New Health Record Using Post-it Notes

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AREA, GA - Despite a flurry of activity in healthcare systems across America to implement efficient electronic health records (EHRs) or even more efficient...
happy hour for health care workers

The Medical Professional Development Drinking Game

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All health professionals will have to participate in some sort of mandatory professional development from time to time.  Whether it’s an organization-wide initiative to...

Point-Counterpoint: I Got Sick from the Flu Shot

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Taking the Point will be Janet Flowerbottom, a local herbal supplement shop owner from Boulder, CO.  Taking the Counterpoint is Carl Hogstrom, a pig...
fullest code

Patient to be “Fullest Code Possible”

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KEARNEY, NE - In what should not be considered abnormal in our day and age, the family of Billy Rubin demanded that the 89-year-old...
podiatrist tickle

Podiatrists Admit They’re Not Really Examining Patients, Just Tickling Them

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TOEJAM LAKE, CA - At the 23rd annual National Podiatric Conference on Bunions, the board of directors voted 5-4 to admit what the public...
hospital ceo salary

CDC Confirms Ebola Transmitted Via Patient Satisfaction Surveys

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ATLANTA, GA - Yesterday, the CDC finally established a link explaining a frightening and puzzling Ebola case.  A patient with no known Ebola exposures in...
PGA pro turns hospital administrator

PGA Pro Becomes Hospital Administrator to Make More Money, Play More Golf

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SCOTTSDALE, AZ - After three mediocre years on the Tour, 28-year-old PGA pro Blake Johnson announced that he is calling it quits and starting...