Primary Care

Gas-X brain farts

Neurologists Recommend Gas-X for Treatment of Brain Farts

0
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for the diagnosis and management of brain farts, a condition characterized...

The Days of Limitless “Allergies” Are Numbered

58
WASHINGTON, DC - Americans have always enjoyed the right to have a limitless numbers of allergies, but after new CMS guidelines were approved this week,...
trump

If Elected, Trump to Appoint Jenny McCarthy as Surgeon General

0
NEW YORK, NY - In a move which further establishes his anti-vaccine stance, Donald Trump announced yesterday that, if elected, he plans to appoint...
honest patient

Doctor Confused by Record Number of Honest Patients

0
SACRAMENTO, CA - In a truly unusual streak of luck, Dr. Joy Arbor of Sacramento Family Health had all honest patients on her panel...
medical students

Optimistic, Bright-Eyed Med Students Eager to Transform into Jaded, Burned-Out Physicians

0
ATLANTA, GA - Like a caterpillar ready to mature into a beautiful butterfly, bright-eyed graduating medical students across the nation are eager to begin...
Wikipedia medical search

Non-Physician Hospitals, The WebMD and Wikipedia Clinic, to Open in 5 Major Cities

0
BOSTON, MA - In a response to rampant poor patient satisfaction scores and an overall demand of patients for more autonomy in their care,...
laboratory testing

Average American Healthcare Consumer Believes Death is Curable‏

35
ATLANTA, GA - According to a new study published in the Annals of External Medicine (AEM), it is reported that the average American health...
cosmo doctors

Cosmo: Eleven Tips for Mind-Blowing, Incredible Doctor Visits!

0
Cosmopolitan magazine recently published “Eleven Tips for Mind-Blowing, Incredible Doctor Visits!” in a slight departure from its usual category of advice.  With permission from...

This Store Provides Real Allergies to Get the Medication you Want

0
BEVERLY HILLS, CA — Natalie Speede-Faster really needed to get back on Adderall.  Her stupid internist was “concerned” because Natalie always wanted a higher...

Hospital Unveils Pain Scale That Goes to Eleven

34
VANCOUVER, BC - In the movie This is Spinal Tap, guitarist Nigel Tufnel proudly shows off an amplifier that turns up to eleven instead...