Primary Care

sneezy

Sneezy Files $5 Million Malpractice Suit Against Doc

9
ORLANDO, FL - Sneezy, a sickly member of the so called, “Seven Dwarves,” filed a malpractice suit yesterday against his fellow dwarf, Doc, for...

Thor Spotted Crushing Reflexes with Mighty Hammer

0
ASGARD – According to witnesses, Thor, Norse God of Thunder, was recently spotted at a local hospital crushing patellar tendons with his mighty new...

Dr. Oz is Right: “The Miracle Pill” is for Real

0
A world-renowned TV celebrity physician Dr. Oz unraveled the mystery behind “The Miracle Pill.”  “This sh** is for real,” says Dr. Oz while throwing...

Exercise ‘Can Be As Good As Pills’

0
Exercise can be as good a medicine as pills for people with conditions such as heart disease, a study has found.  The work in the...
driving to ED

Uber Rolls Out New ED-to-ED Transit Service for Drug Seekers

60
PHILADELPHIA, PA - Filling a niche in a market that has been underserved for years, on-demand transportation company, Uber, has rolled out a novel...
on call

AMiON Scheduler To Be Replaced With A Simplified Text Saying ‘Yes’

0
NEWTON, MA - In a move aimed at reducing operative costs, Spiral software's administrative staff issued a statement according to which AMiON popular scheduler is...

CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus

0
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...
pepsi

Coca-Cola Lashes Out, Reveals What Happens 1 Hour After Drinking Pepsi

0
ATLANTA, GA - After a recent infographic caused a stir by revealing what happens to the human body within the first hour of drinking...
gout

Patient Continues to Insist He Suffers from “The Gouch,” Not Gout

0
NEW YORK, NY - Larry McCarthy is a 65-year-old gentleman who doesn’t believe in the classic food pyramid; he believes in meat and alcohol...

Brave Patient Speaks Up About Lower Back Pain

0
LOS GATOS, CA – Mrs. Ann Oyin is a 82-year-old librarian who presented to her PCP for a cold that wasn’t getting any better....