Primary Care

placebo pill

Pharma on the Search for Second Generation Placebo

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After decades of clinical drug trials involving placebos,Placebo pills now have too many side effects.  We need a second generation placebo pill the pharmaceutical...
podiatrist tickle

Podiatrists Admit They’re Not Really Examining Patients, Just Tickling Them

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TOEJAM LAKE, CA - At the 23rd annual National Podiatric Conference on Bunions, the board of directors voted 5-4 to admit what the public...
doc mcstuffins

Study: Doc McStuffins More Evidence-Based Than Dr. Oz

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ANAHEIM, CA - Public health researchers have published the results of a new study which sought to objectively measure the quality of medical advice given...
lawyers drinking

Proposition 46 in California Designed by Inebriated Trial Lawyers, Sparks Proposition 47 and 48

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SACRAMENTO, CA - A ferocious yearlong battle over Proposition 46 will be decided in California at the polls this upcoming November.  Proposition 46 includes proposals...
An alcoholic dream

Alcoholic Fills Out Negative Patient Survey for Care Received on Christmas Morning

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - 52-year-old Milton Applewood, a raging alcoholic who visits Holy Cross Hospital on a weekly basis, was appalled at the medical...

Family Cancels Vacation after EpiPen Use

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INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Bad news from the Carson family house yesterday, Chris and Jenny had to tell their kids that their recent use of...
55-hour ENERGY

FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
empathy medical robot

Hospital to Employ Empathy Robots to Allow Nurses and Doctors to Chart

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Tired of being treated like a number at big hospitals?  Mercy Hospital in San Francisco wants to change that and they...
iatrogenic injury fun run

Local Hospital Sponsors 5K Fun Run to Raise Awareness About Iatrogenic Injury

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HAVRE DE GRACE, MD - After noticing several readmissions for falls, double-digit INRs, and recurrent nonischemic chest pain, hospitalists at Harford Memorial Hospital realized that...
health care provider

An Inside Look at a Modern Health Care Practitioner’s Day

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This is a day in the envious life of the modern health care practitioner. One hour before the shift starts Hit snooze.  Hit snooze again.  Break...