CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby...
ER Places Bowl Full of Percocet in Waiting Room, Lowers Visits
HANOVER, NJ – Local emergency medicine physicians have developed a groundbreaking way to reduce the number of patients they will see during a shift. The...
Local Doctor Consults Sauron to Create the One Pill to Cure Them All
“I was at my wits’ end with these chronic pain patients,” Local doctor Fro Doe told reporters. “They keep coming in over and over...
Doctor Puts Tostitos Restaurant Style Chips and Salsa in Waiting Room, Business Booms
Dr. Dufunk, while watching Dancing with the Stars with his wife, noticed during a commercial that putting Tostitos Restaurant Style Chips out in your...
Obama Says Sweeping Changes Will Eliminate Doctor Shortage
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Speaking at a live press conference from the Rose Garden today, President Obama announced major changes to health care, that he...
After Another Horrid Shift, Doctor Calls Palliative Care on Self, Goes Home with Hospice
ATLANTA, GA - For internist Karen Davenport, today’s shift was the straw that broke the camel’s back. She struggled mightily as she was asked...
New Smartphone App + Selfie Stick Allows Patients to Take Own X-Rays at Home
CUPERTINO, CA - The telemedicine boom is poised to become an explosion, as a new app allows smartphone users to take their own x-rays with...
The Fantasy Google Electronic Medical Record Vs. Reality
Maybe Google needs to be hired for the next generation of electronic medical records. Most of us would appreciate these new changes.
Public Flees California in Droves Due to Dilaudid Shortage
CALIFORNIA - As a result of a statewide shortage of the popular IV opioid pain medication, Dilaudid, a mass emigration of people away from...
Patient Able to Get Dilaudid Just Before Leaving AMA
JACKSONVILLE, FL – Michael Redmond - a patient so regular to St. Joseph Hospital’s ER that if he doesn’t show up for a couple days,...