New Blood Test Measures Serum A**hole Levels
BETHESDA, MD - Researchers at the National Institutes of Health (NIH) are giddy over a fantastic new blood test that can only be described...
Patient with 9 Listed Allergies and ‘High Pain Tolerance’ Actually Has a High Pain...
TOPEKA, KS – Local ER Physician Dr. Onlee Cönsults claims he met the Great White Buffalo of ER patients during his shift last evening...
Breaking: Patient Taking Blood Thinner to Keep Blood Thin!
KEARNEY, NE - Kind Humanitarian Hospital's Dr. Naya Statin was in for a revelation when gathering medication history from a new patient Gabby Pentin.
"I see that...
Barn Birthing Centers Gaining Popularity Across Nation
BROOKLYN, IA – A new birthing option for expectant mothers is currently taking the nation by storm. Barn birthing will soon supplant the water birth as...
Pokemon Go Video Game Gets People To Go Outside
CHICAGO, IL - Doctors are flabbergasted by what Nintendo has achieved. For years, they have been telling patients to stop playing video games and...
Beef Rib Named Official State Fruit of Texas
LOCKHART, TX - Say goodbye to the Texas red grapefruit as the official state fruit of Texas. Texas legislators will meet later tomorrow in...
Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level
KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental...
CDC Quarantines Jenny McCarthy
ATLANTA, GA -- Due to the severe flu outbreak this season, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has decided to examine the...
Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab
SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out. Pay was decreasing and vacation...
Patient Surprised to Learn Zombie Doctor Not in Costume
HOLTON, KS - An area woman, recently treated in a rural Kansas emergency room on Halloween was surprised to learn that her zombie doctor...