Primary Care

Patient Stuck in Endless ‘Clearance’ Referral Pattern, Hasn’t Had Surgery in 6 Years

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Mr. Smith, a 67-year-old man with a fair number of medical problems, has been trying to be medically cleared for an inguinal hernia operation...
doctor patient

Breaking: Patient States His Medical History Should “All be in the Computer”

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CHARLESTON, SC - Breaking News emerged today out of South Carolina’s Emergency Department of Save Us All Memorial Hospital (SUAMH). A 57-year-old patient arrived...

Point-Counterpoint: I Got Sick from the Flu Shot

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Taking the Point will be Janet Flowerbottom, a local herbal supplement shop owner from Boulder, CO.  Taking the Counterpoint is Carl Hogstrom, a pig...
vaccines

Big Pharma Admits They’re Just Trying to Kill Everybody with Vaccines

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In what is being hailed as a huge victory for the anti-vaccine movement, Big Pharma announced to the world today that they've...
apples

Statin-Infused Apples Daily to Keep Even More Doctors Away

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WARWICK, NY - A team of farmers in upstate New York have successfully infused apples with 80 mg of atorvastatin in the hopes it...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful...
pepsi

Coca-Cola Lashes Out, Reveals What Happens 1 Hour After Drinking Pepsi

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ATLANTA, GA - After a recent infographic caused a stir by revealing what happens to the human body within the first hour of drinking...

Patient’s Modified Lifestyle Kills Doctor

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CHICAGO, IL - Belinda Torres, a Chicago area busy professional, sent shockwaves throughout the medical community by taking her physician’s advice and modifying her lifestyle. ...
geriatric patient survived

Geriatric Patient Miraculously Survives a 4-Day Weekend in the Hospital

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NORTH PLATTE, NE - It was a true Christmas miracle for geriatric patient, Alfred Dwindles, when he found himself alive and without significant healthcare-induced...
abdominal pain

Hospitalist Becomes Own Endless Loop

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In a stunning procession of events, nocturnist Angus "Kilty" McSwagger became the only known hospitalist to experience the so-called "admission mirror paradox."  Long speculated...