Psychiatry

Sonny Too Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, Admitted to Psych

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GOLDEN VALLEY, MN - GomerBlog has learned Sonny the Cuckoo Bird has been transferred to General Mills’ Inpatient Psychiatric Unit after he was found...

ER Places Bowl Full of Percocet in Waiting Room, Lowers Visits

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HANOVER, NJ – Local emergency medicine physicians have developed a groundbreaking way to reduce the number of patients they will see during a shift.  The...

Move Over Pain Score….the Crazy Score is Here!

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Given the overarching success of the Pain Score leading to the opioid crisis, The Joint Commission (for Healthcare Absurdity) has now added the sixth...

Hospital’s New ‘Therapy Monkey’ Program Met with Mixed Reviews

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AURORA, CO – Three weeks after its launch, an innovative new ‘Therapy Monkey’ program at Children’s Hospital Colorado is being met with mixed reviews....

Therapy Dogs Now Required to Write Progress Notes

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BOSTON, MA – In another unprecedented move by the Joint Commission (JC), therapy dogs will now be required to write progress notes on the patients...

Mandatory New Regulations: Staff Must Spy on Paranoid Schizophrenics in ICU

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Taking care of paranoid schizophrenics presents unique challenges for medical personnel and families alike.  This can be especially challenging when they ends up in...

Pseudoseizure: Please Practice Before Coming to the ED

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MILWAUKEE, WI - Emergency department staff at Elm Grove Methodist Medical Center thoroughly enjoyed the complete nonsensical seizure performance by a local homemaker. Carol Whitaker, 43, of...
therapy dog

Physician Reprimanded for Overprescribing Therapy Dogs

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RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA – An Inland Empire doctor has been placed on probationary status by the Medical Board of California for overprescribing therapy dogs,...
doctor updating

What Your Doctor or Nurse Means When They Say Your Loved One is ‘Doing...

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The devil is in the details and, for patients and family members, those details can be hard to squeeze out of those shifty doctors...
dilaudid gastroparesis

Drug Seeker Fills Entire Emesis Bucket with Noise Before Receiving Dilaudid

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DAYTONA BEACH, FL - Deborah Samson, a 47-year-old non-diabetic drug seeker with a terrible but mysterious case of opioid-induced abdominal pain, was forced last week...