Psychiatry

lawn chair

Psychiatrist Downsizes Psychiatry Couch to Crappy Lawn Chair

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LOS ANGELES, CA - The direct result of budgetary cutbacks and an attempt to stay afloat, psychiatrist Eric Tavernier has downgraded his psychiatry couch for...

Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease

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NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases."  Unfortunately,...
pharmacy

Pharmacy Creates Express Line for Psychotropic Drugs

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HOUSTON, TX - A local pharmacy has taken a novel approach to meet the need of patients’ hectic schedules.  Whereas most pharmacies disperse medication on...

Valium Advent Calendar Being Tested by Local Pharmaceutical Company

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SALT LAKE CITY, UT – Parents will be able to count down the days until Christmas in a much more soothing manner this season. A...
Blood gravy content concentration level

CDC Issues Blood Gravy Content Chart for Thanksgiving

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ATLANTA, GA - Ahead of Thanksgiving, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has issued a new blood gravy content (BCG) chart, reminding...

Veterinarians Demand Cease and Desist of Emotional Support Animal Letters in Wake of Burnout...

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Veterinarians are seeing a spike in burn out amongst dogs, thanks to rampant abuse of the “emotional support animal” label (ESA). In the past...
doctor updating

What Your Doctor or Nurse Means When They Say Your Loved One is ‘Doing...

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The devil is in the details and, for patients and family members, those details can be hard to squeeze out of those shifty doctors...
stressed medical student

APA Finally Admits It Just Too Damn Lazy to Add Treatment Section to DSM

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WASHINGTON, DC—The American Psychiatric Association (APA) has at long last definitively answered a question that has been floating around ever since the publication of...
doctor notes DVT PE

Charting is Independent Risk Factor for DVT and PE, Study Finds

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ROCHESTER, MN - Recognizing it is a form of immobilization in which health care professionals are unable to move around much, a study newly published...

Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab

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SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out.  Pay was decreasing and vacation...