Psychiatry Consulted to Determine if Lungs Have Capacity
BOSTON, MA - In an unusual move yesterday at Massachusetts Lieutenant General Hospital (MGLH), a medical team has consulted psychiatry to determine if their...
Psychiatrist Downsizes Psychiatry Couch to Crappy Lawn Chair
LOS ANGELES, CA - The direct result of budgetary cutbacks and an attempt to stay afloat, psychiatrist Eric Tavernier has downgraded his psychiatry couch for...
Man Pretends to Have Heroin Addiction Just to Go to Rehab
SAN DIEGO, CA - 37-year-old respiratory therapist, Jonathan Mildersten, like many other working at University Hospital, was getting burned out. Pay was decreasing and vacation...
Drug Seeker Fills Entire Emesis Bucket with Noise Before Receiving Dilaudid
DAYTONA BEACH, FL - Deborah Samson, a 47-year-old non-diabetic drug seeker with a terrible but mysterious case of opioid-induced abdominal pain, was forced last week...
On-Call Resident Realizes Entire Housestaff is Sundowning
NEW YORK, NY - On her first overnight call, internal medicine intern Dr. Erica Dalton has realized the entire hospital staff is sundowning. “I...
Millions of Americans Battling Panic Disorder, Forgot to Move ‘Elf on the Shelf’ Variant
ATLANTA, GA - The CDC has confirmed that a new anxiety syndrome has reached epidemic levels among parents nationwide. Panic Disorder, Forgot to Move...
FDA Finally Approves The Ativan Diffuser for All Hospital Units
WASHINGTON, DC - In a closely contested vote, the FDA approved a new medical delivery device this week, the H-Vape 86. It is an Ativan...
The 7 Stages of Grief When Faced with an Admission
The Rübler-Koss model or 7 stages of grief is a series of emotional stages an admitting attending experiences when faced with an impending admission....
Dr. Hal Dole Voted Best Psychiatrist of the Year
KEARNEY, NE - For the tenth year in the row, the venerable Dr. Hal Dole was recognized as the most effective psychiatrist by the...
Psychiatry Residents Estimate that 30% of Consults are for Comatose Patients
Dr. Charles Willis scowls at his beeping pager for interrupting his lunch break. “Christ almighty, I can’t sit down for a couple hours without...