Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth
BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine? Not any more. According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England...
Nervous Patient’s KUB Shows Butterflies in Her Stomach
LOS ANGELES, CA - A 44-year-old female was preparing for a big work-related speech when she presented to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center with anxiety and...
Patient Goes on Tangent About Sines & Cosines
ATLANTA, GA - Though primary care physician (PCP) Evelyn Waters asked patient Phillip Rose how he was doing with lifestyle changes in regards to...
Pediatric Community Stunned When Patient Brings Back Vanderbilt Forms for ADHD Evaluation
LECOMA, MO - After being seen in the clinic about a week ago for chronic behavioral outburst, a local 9-year-old boy and his parents...
Local Drug Seeker Discovers That 8/10 Pain Gets The Same Amount of Pain Meds...
Long-time drug seeker, Kyle Smith, recently discovered that stating his pain is 8/10 instead of the typical 12/10 gets him the same amount of...
Move Over Pain Score….the Crazy Score is Here!
Given the overarching success of the Pain Score leading to the opioid crisis, The Joint Commission (for Healthcare Absurdity) has now added the sixth...
Pseudoseizure: Please Practice Before Coming to the ED
MILWAUKEE, WI - Emergency department staff at Elm Grove Methodist Medical Center thoroughly enjoyed the complete nonsensical seizure performance by a local homemaker.
Carol Whitaker, 43, of...
‘I’m Never Going to Drink Again’ Uttered by 40 Million Americans New Year’s Morning
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The FDA estimates that over 40 million Americans will utter the phrase “I’m never going to drink again” on New Year’s...
Doctor Summons Courage to Toss Unread New England Journals
PITTSBURGH, PA - Sometimes it's better to acknowledge one's own shortcomings and move on. That is why we're saluting a hero, internist Dr. Keisha...
Study Finds Needle Anxiety Worsens with Tattoos
BALTIMORE, MD - Johns Hopkins researchers published a shocking new study in this month's New England Journal of Medicine showing a correlation between the...