Psychiatry

Hypochondriacs Try to Cope with Pandemic: It’s Not Going So Wel

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SICKLERVILLE, NJ—Local hypochondriac, Emma Dyne, is not taking any chances with the coronavirus pandemic. For the last month, the 25-year-old healthy woman has worn...

Invisible Medical Offenses Now Diagnosed as “Nanoaggressions”

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BERKELEY, CA - This week, a working group for the future DSM-VI, the well-recognized psychiatry diagnosis manual, announced that they will be focusing on...

Emergency Departments Implement New Triage Form to Screen Patients for Actual Disease

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NEW YORK, NY - Myocardial infarction, subarachnoid hemorrhage, sepsis, diabetic ketoacidosis: these are examples of what the medical community regards as "real diseases."  Unfortunately,...

Breaking: Hulk Hogan Has Hulkadepression

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BEVERLY HILL, CA - After several decades of recurrent episodes of Hulkamania, retired pro-wrestler Hulk Hogan has been formally diagnosed with his first episode...
haldol delivery system

Haldol Blowdart Halted in Phase 3 Clinical Trial Due to ‘Safety Concerns’

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MORRISTOWN, NJ - Recognizing the mounting need for new and creative ways to quickly administer haloperidol (a typical antipsychotic drug) to that “difficult” patient, Big...
emotional scar collagen

Breaking: Patient Reports 9 Out of 10 (Emotional) Pain

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SAN DIEGO, CA - Laura Martin reported that she was in pain when her nurse came to check in on her. "How bad is your...

If the Alcoholic Patient in Room 320 Soils His Sheets Again, Nurse Plans on...

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MIAMI, FL - Emily Jenkins, a medical ward nurse, plans on completely "losing it" if the alcoholic patient in room 320 soils his bed sheets...
naptime in hammock

Renegade Clan of Nap Specialists Declare Independence from Sleep Medicine

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DARIEN, IL - In a startling development, a renegade clan of nap specialists known as “The Nappers” have seceded from the American Association of...
skull fracture

Depressed Skull Fracture Patient Started on Zoloft Drip, Psychiatry Referral

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ALBINA, OR - An area resident covering the ED recently treated a patient with chief complaint of "depressed skull fracture," by prescribing IV sertraline...
medical consults

A Primer to How We All Consult One Another

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Does your patient need help but you're just not sure who to consult for help? This GomerBlog primer is here to break things down...