Psychiatry

Hypochondriacs Try to Cope with Pandemic: It’s Not Going So Wel

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SICKLERVILLE, NJ—Local hypochondriac, Emma Dyne, is not taking any chances with the coronavirus pandemic. For the last month, the 25-year-old healthy woman has worn...

Clinically-Depressed Resident Not Flexible Enough for Yoga

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TAMPA, FL - In a sad and tragic turn of events, local resident doctor James Hilden was told that he would never fully be...

Psych Agrees: “It’s Just Another Manic Monday”

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - Well, the weekend is over and it's the start of a new work week.  For Tulane psychiatrist Curtis Loder, his...
psychiatrist

To Hide Identity from Crazed Patients, Psychiatrists Urged to Use Porn Star Names Professionally

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WASHINGTON, DC—Studies indicate that of all medical specialists, psychiatrists are the most likely to be physically harmed by their patients. In response, the American...
personality disorder

New Contagious Disease Recognized: Defensive-Irrational Personality Disorder

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"The incorporation of Defensive-Irrational Personality Disorder (DIPD) into the ICD-10 is a welcome addition.  DIPD has long been recognized, but never before incorporated into...

Surgeon Struggles to Carve Turkey at Thanksgiving

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DES MOINES, IA - Thanksgiving has finally arrived and is in full swing across the country.  Millions of dysfunctional families get together for a celebration...

Emergency Psychiatry Will No Longer See Patients Unless Actively Committing Suicide

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The Emergency Psychiatry Department at Wakefield Hospital in Minnesota has released a consensus statement outlining the conditions under which they will consult a patient...
icu pumps

American Geriatrics Association Publishes Guidelines on Gomeritis

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The American Geriatrics Association has finally published its guidelines on gomeritis, a complex entity caused by the progressive deterioration of a gomerular brain.  A...

Dr. Hal Dole Voted Best Psychiatrist of the Year

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KEARNEY, NE - For the tenth year in the row, the venerable Dr. Hal Dole was recognized as the most effective psychiatrist by the...