Therapy Dogs Now Required to Write Progress Notes
BOSTON, MA – In another unprecedented move by the Joint Commission (JC), therapy dogs will now be required to write progress notes on the patients...
ER Places Bowl Full of Percocet in Waiting Room, Lowers Visits
HANOVER, NJ – Local emergency medicine physicians have developed a groundbreaking way to reduce the number of patients they will see during a shift. The...
Psychiatrist Downsizes Psychiatry Couch to Crappy Lawn Chair
LOS ANGELES, CA - The direct result of budgetary cutbacks and an attempt to stay afloat, psychiatrist Eric Tavernier has downgraded his psychiatry couch for...
Psychiatry Residents Estimate that 30% of Consults are for Comatose Patients
Dr. Charles Willis scowls at his beeping pager for interrupting his lunch break. “Christ almighty, I can’t sit down for a couple hours without...
Local Psychiatrist Using Big Words, Wondering Why Patients Aren’t Improving
MEMPHIS, TN - "I usually start the session off by telling the patient about my triple boards in psychiatry, adult developmental psychiatry, and addiction...
Mandatory New Regulations: Staff Must Spy on Paranoid Schizophrenics in ICU
Taking care of paranoid schizophrenics presents unique challenges for medical personnel and families alike. This can be especially challenging when they ends up in...
Fanduel to Debut Betting on Drunk ED Patients’ Alcohol Levels
LOS ANGELES, CA - Popular daily fantasy sports betting site Fanduel announced today that they will soon be branching out into a new gambling,...
Worst Pick-Up Lines by Medical Subspecialty
GomerBlog did some research on a hot and steamy topic: What are the worst pick-up lines by subspecialty? Here goes!
Allergy
“I like it when you...
The Days of Limitless “Allergies” Are Numbered
WASHINGTON, DC - Americans have always enjoyed the right to have a limitless numbers of allergies, but after new CMS guidelines were approved this week,...
Move Over Pain Score….the Crazy Score is Here!
Given the overarching success of the Pain Score leading to the opioid crisis, The Joint Commission (for Healthcare Absurdity) has now added the sixth...