Psychiatry

emergency room patient

Local Drug Seeker Discovers That 8/10 Pain Gets The Same Amount of Pain Meds...

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Long-time drug seeker, Kyle Smith, recently discovered that stating his pain is 8/10 instead of the typical 12/10 gets him the same amount of...

Pseudoseizure: Please Practice Before Coming to the ED

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MILWAUKEE, WI - Emergency department staff at Elm Grove Methodist Medical Center thoroughly enjoyed the complete nonsensical seizure performance by a local homemaker. Carol Whitaker, 43, of...

Psych Ward Temporarily Closes after Admitting a Patient with COPD

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Charleston, WV - The Psychiatric Inpatient Unit at Memorial Hospital has temporarily closed due to an unplanned, insidious event. “The day started off as...
driving to ED

Uber Rolls Out New ED-to-ED Transit Service for Drug Seekers

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PHILADELPHIA, PA - Filling a niche in a market that has been underserved for years, on-demand transportation company, Uber, has rolled out a novel...
haldol delivery system

Haldol Blowdart Halted in Phase 3 Clinical Trial Due to ‘Safety Concerns’

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MORRISTOWN, NJ - Recognizing the mounting need for new and creative ways to quickly administer haloperidol (a typical antipsychotic drug) to that “difficult” patient, Big...
psychiatry resident

Due to Late Consult, Psychiatrist Leaves Hospital After 3 PM

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Psychiatry resident Dr. David Smith left the hospital around 3:30pm today, after arriving at about 11 am.  At press time Dr. Smith could not...

Hospital Pilots Pet Therapy with Black Bears, Grizzlies

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VALHALLA, NY - Hospital administrators at Westchester Medical Center are piloting a new pet therapy program using service animals - black bears and grizzlies,...

Patient Demands Accommodation for Emotional Support Lice

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Patient Tom Schmidt was admitted to Community Hospital today for an infected diabetic foot ulcer when his nurse, Jake Hart, noticed him scratching his...

Borderline, Bipolar, and Depression Combined into One Diagnosis to Make Psychiatrist’s Lives Even Easier

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CHICAGO, IL - In an unprecedented update to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, three previous separate diagnostic categories will be collapsed...

Tattoo-to-Tooth Ratio a Strong Intelligence Predictor

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BIRMINGHAM, AL – Hospital administrators have been searching for better ways to educate patients prior to being discharged.  Administrators may have found their answer...