anesthesiologist intubate bored anesthesiologist

Breaking: CMS Creates New Blame Anesthesia ICD-10 Codes

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) & National Center of Health Statistics (HCHS) have created a new set of ICD-10 codes allowing non-Anesthesiology health care professionals to both blame...

Breaking: Surgeon Asks Anesthesia to Lower His Tray Table

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DELTA 291 - Citing numerous reasons why he couldn't perform the maneuver by himself, passenger and general surgeon Richard Patton has asked Anesthesia to lower his tray table so that he might rest his smartphone and beverage on...
sleeping in

Trauma Surgeon Looks Forward to Sleeping in Until 5 AM Tomorrow

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SEATTLE, WA - After what has been undoubtedly a very busy week even for what is expected this time of year, Harborview Medical Center trauma surgeon Ramona Myer looks forward to a lighter day of...

Breaking: Anesthesia Celebrating That Ambien Can Be Blamed for Everything Now

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BREAKING - Anesthesiologists and CRNAs across the globe are celebrating today as the baton of blame has been passed onto Ambien for absolutely anything and everything that can go wrong in the hospital or...

Anesthesiologists Now Offering Tap from a Ball-Peen Hammer as Natural Option for Sedation

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Under pressure from the Natural Medicine movement, the American Society of Anesthesiologists have discovered a "natural" and "drug-free" approach toward preparing a patient for surgery: a firm, well-placed knock to the skull with a...
Tim Penn medical scribe

Breaking: Burned-Out Medical Scribe Hires Own Medical Scribe

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AUGUSTA, GA - Exhausted and admittedly burned out from taking notes for emergency room (ER) health care professionals at Augusta Medical Center, medical scribe Amy Bruckner has taken it upon herself to hire her...
medulla oblongata intramedullary nail IMN

Orthopod Places Intramedullary Nail Into Medulla Oblongata

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ANN ARBOR, MI - Expanding the possibilities of what can be done in the subspecialty of orthopedic surgery, orthopod Brock Hammersley has placed an intramedullary nail (IMN) into his patient's medulla oblongata in order...
epidural middle economy Trendelenburg

United Airlines Introduces Seats That Go Into Trendelenburg

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CHICAGO, IL - Seeking new ways to remain controversial and constantly in the news, United Airlines has announced it is has replaced passenger seats with brand new seats that go all the way into...
racehorse peeing Lasix

Racehorse Confirms He’s Peeing Like a Human on Lasix

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LOUISVILLE, KY - A 4-year-old thoroughbred and racehorse named I's & O's has confirmed with Gomerblog that he is not only peeing but peeing profusely, like a human on Lasix (furosemide). "No question, I'm urinating...
Death Star Darth Vader

Vader Displeased with Readmissions, Delinquent Discharge Summaries

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MED-SURG UNIT, DEATH STAR MEDICAL CENTER, DEATH STAR - We have received word from the Rebel Alliance that Darth Vader has been distracted and displeased by the woeful readmission and length-of-stay metrics reported at last...