Medical Specialties as Disney Characters
Anesthesia - Rafiki from The Lion King. Most of the rest of us have no clue what the hell you are doing with all...
Doctor to Hand Out Metformin for Halloween
HOUSTON, TX – Local physician Dr. Sharma plans to hand out “Fun-Size” packages of metformin this Halloween.
“Pretty much every child develops diabetes on November...
Passenger Wants Epidural Before Squeezing Into Middle Economy Seat
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Realizing that there was no other way around what would otherwise be four hours of misery, lanky and long-limbed 6'...
Radiologist Orders CT to Figure Out Contents of Breakfast Burrito
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Radiologist Calvin Sherpa sat silently at his outdoor patio table, staring at his breakfast burrito that he ordered at his...
Breaking: Winning Word at Ortho Spelling Bee is “WBAT”
TIBIAL PLAINS, PA - Defeating over 300 of the country’s best-spelling orthopods, Jimmy “Jackhammer” Jameson has claimed the coveted title of American Ortho Spelling Bee...
Gerbil in Colon Nervously Awaits Bowel Prep Tsunami
SOME DUDE'S COLON - Gerald the Gerbil just received the bad news that his whereabouts have been discovered, and now he nervously awaits the...
5.8 Million Packers Fans Sign Up to Donate Their Clavicles to Aaron Rodgers
GREEN BAY, WI - After Aaron Rodgers went down in Sunday's game against the Minnesota Vikings (0 Super Bowl trophies in team history), Packers (5...
Emergency Physician’s Eyes Well Up at Sight of Empty Waiting Room
DES MOINES, IA - Staring in awe as the final patient was discharged home, local emergency physician Dave Stanfield’s eyes reportedly welled up at...
Breaking: Nice Patients Added to Endangered Species List
WASHINGTON, DC - In a move suggesting they are likely to become extinct unless something more is done to save them for future generations, the...
Pathetic Anesthesiologist Can’t Even Put Own Kids to Sleep
In an embarrassing display of parenting incompetence, 38-year-old anesthesiologist Eric Springer was unable to put his own kids to bed late Thursday night. That's...