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diabetic coma

Cookie Monster in Critical Condition Due to Diabetic Complications

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SESAME STREET - Children around the world awoke from sleepy-time to the stunning news that Cookie Monster is battling for his life in the intensive...
nursing home

Bed-Bound, Demented 89-Year-Old Successfully Resuscitated, Discharged to Wallow in Own Excrement at Nursing Home

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GREENSBORO, NC - A team of physicians, nurses, and support staff is being lauded for its efforts in saving the life of Jasper Billings,...
styrofoam stetoscope

Styrofoam Cup Outperforms Crappy Disposable Stethoscope

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ABSTRACT Given the increased proliferation of multidrug resistant (MDR) microorganisms, it is considered standard of care to use patient-dedicated, disposable, or “crappy” stethoscopes to prevent...
joint commssion tips

Petition to Rip Down All Joint Commission Tips and Pearls Sheets from Bathroom Stalls...

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How sick are you of seeing Joint Commission tips and acronyms printed out and taped to bathroom stalls?  If you are like most health...
hospital casino

Las Vegas Hospital Expands into Luxury Resort and Casino

9
LAS VEGAS, NV - In a bold new plan to increase hospital revenue streams, hospital administrators at Las Vegas Medical Center have teamed up with...
medical school teaching

Medical Schools to Replace Curriculum with Year-Long Course in ICD-10 and E&M Coding

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In a visionary statement, the deans of ten of this nation’s top medical schools, including four Ivy League schools announced today that they are...
daughter to hospital day

Hospital’s ‘Take Your Daughter to Work’ Day Not Such a Good Idea

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Hepatobiliary surgeon Dr. Jeanne Devereux was disappointed.  "How hard could it be?!" she fumed.  "Just hold the damn retractor and...
pathology

Pathology Duty Pager Goes Off Overnight

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SAN DIEGO, CA - In a rare, unexpected occurrence, the pathology duty pager went off at 11 p.m. last night, disturbing the quiet slumber of...
er nurse

ER Nurses Holding Unplaced Inpatients Cheer Whenever ‘Code Blue’ Called Overhead

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ZIP CITY, AL - After a record breaking week of admissions via the ER and an increase in scheduled outpatient procedures, St. Bertram Hospital in...
mrsa spider

Devious MRSA Spider Bites Yet Another Antecubital Fossa, Remains at Large

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GASTONIA, NC - Following an all-too-familiar recent theme, a new patient was assaulted last week by a psychotic spider rampaging through the South. Earl Wayne...