Emergency Physician’s Eyes Well Up at Sight of Empty Waiting Room
DES MOINES, IA - Staring in awe as the final patient was discharged home, local emergency physician Dave Stanfield’s eyes reportedly welled up at...
Breaking: Nice Patients Added to Endangered Species List
WASHINGTON, DC - In a move suggesting they are likely to become extinct unless something more is done to save them for future generations, the...
Radiologist in Yosemite Plummets to Death in Search of Strong WiFi Signal
YOSEMITE, CA - A vacation turned to heartbreak and tragedy today when radiologist Craig Sherpa plummeted to his death while climbing Yosemite National Park's Half...
CVS to Limit Opioid Prescription Length to 7 Days, Unless You Say “Pretty Please?!”...
WOONSOCKET, RI - Stepping up to the plate to help combat the ongoing opioid epidemic, CVS Pharmacy has adopted a new opioid policy that...
Anesthesiologist General Requests Senate Democrats Continue to Perform all Presidential Blocks
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a move sure to frustrate the President, Anesthesiologist General Dr. Jerome Adams has decided that he will not perform any...
Medical Professions as NFL Teams
Anesthesia is the Cincinnati Bengals: no one knows anyone on the team; they rotate so often it’s not worth learning names anyway.
Orthopaedics are the...
How Ironic: Entire Palliative Care Team is Full Code
ST. LOUIS, MO - Palliative care, as defined by the World Health Organization (WHO), is "an approach that improves the quality of life of...
On-Call Ophthalmologist Heroically Manages Eye Emergency from Bed
DES MOINES, IA - Answering his phone in a daze at 2 AM last night, on-call ophthalmologist Reece Barnett reportedly handled a vision threatening...
Nurse Assigned to Shake Empty Toner Cartridge Every 5 Minutes
LOUISVILLE, KY - As punishment for not charting a respiratory rate other than 16, first-year nurse Randy Tolbert has been relegated from patient care...
It’s About Damn Time: Cup of Coffee Awarded Nobel Prize in Medicine
NEW YORK, NY - There was a big surprise earlier this week when a cup of coffee was announced as the winner of the 2017...