Doctor Tries to Clear Up Traffic Congestion with Flonase
ATLANTA, GA - Sincerely hoping that the rush-hour traffic this afternoon is just a manifestation of seasonal allergies, internist Roger Willoughby has just given two spritzes of Flonase (fluticasone) outside of both his driver's...
Medical Mystery Baffles Physicians
An unsolved medical mystery is challenging and frustrating some of the brightest medical minds at Bergendorst Medical Center in Greenville, Iowa. Morbidly obese 58 year old Stanley Green suffers from uncontrolled diabetes, severe emphysema,...
Inevitable Really: Batman Diagnosed with Histoplasmosis
GOTHAM CITY - Saying that it is pretty remarkable that he even went this long without catching it, doctors at Gotham City Medical Center (GCMC) have diagnosed DC superhero Batman with acute pulmonary histoplasmosis. ...
Hospital Opens Smoker’s Lounge for Patients
CHICAGO, IL - Lord Have Mercy Hospital has taken patient satisfaction to a whole new level by recently opening a “Smoker’s Lounge” for its chain smokers. It is already gaining huge popularity among the...
Phew! Lung Biopsy Notes Healthy Diaphragm & Liver Tissue
AUSTIN, TX - A patient in Austin is relieved to learn this morning that her lung biopsy results showed nothing but the presence of healthy diaphragmatic tissue and normal liver parenchyma. ...
VA Patient Breaks Record, Quits Smoking 365 Times In One Year
BOSTON, MA - Joe Kamel, a 69-year-old veteran, has made his way into the Guinness Book of World Records. The Vietnam War veteran had not seen a doctor for 21 years before he presented...
Vaping Company Denies New Breastmilk-Flavored E-Cigarette Targets Newborn
SEATTLE, WA—A Seattle-based vaping company has been forced into damage control amidst claims that its new e-cigarette targets newborns. The basis for the claims arises from the fact that the new e-cigarette is breastmilk-flavored...
Doctor Absolutely Crushes the Lung Exam This Morning
AUSTIN, TX - The patient's lungs never stood a chance. After some idle chit-chat about symptoms of dyspnea and wheeze, hospitalist Miguel Ruiz proceeded to dominate the lung exam and kick its sorry little ass...
Apocolyptic Electronic Medical Record Becomes Self-Aware
"And just like that, the world burned." Those haunting words were discovered deep within a nursing note by hospitalist Kilty McSwagger while he was reviewing what appeared to be a large stack of useless...
