Teaching Team Consults Magic 8-Ball for Assistance
NEW YORK, NY - "Will my patient need placement?" intern Jamie Dreessen asked the Magic 8-Ball, shaking it solidly for 15-seconds before placing it on...
Med School to Do Away with Tuition, Will Now Charge Arm, Leg
American Medical School announced today that it will no longer charge students tuition, but will instead bill for individual limbs.
“Two arms for the classroom...
Breaking: Intern Can’t Hold It, Pees on Self
INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Unable to speak up and hold his bladder any longer on morning rounds, surgical intern Chris McElroy decided to pee all over...
AMSA, ISIS Agree to New Global Health Initiative
BAGHDAD, IRAQ – After years of intense negotiations, the American Medical Student Association (AMSA) and Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) have reached...
Laboratory Technician Decides to Delay ‘Stat’ Blood Test Result Due to Excessive Pestering
INDIANA – Today a laboratory technician at Holy Cross Hospital decided enough was enough and took matters into his own hands. At 5:42 a.m....
Medical Student’s Artwork Accepted to Netter Gross Anatomy Book, Disappointment Ensues
TULSA, OK – 24-year-old medical student, Jeremy Stevenson has been an aspiring artist at heart. Finally he was able to combine his love for artwork...
Respiratory Therapist with 11 Years Experience Doesn’t Know More Than Medical Student
CHARLOTTE, NC - Local Respiratory Therapist Val Silver has seen it all in her nearly a dozen years working at UNC Hospital. If you don’t...
Adorbs! Med Student Thinks CAGE Questionnaire Has to Do with Pets
MIAMI, FL - Today during bedside rounds first-year medical student Eric Smiley was asked what he could tell the team about the CAGE questionnaire. ...
COVID-19 Solution: In Event of Vent Shortage, Med Students Will Bag Indefinitely
CHANTILLY, VA - In the unfortunate but very possible event a surge of COVID-19 hospitalizations leads to a shortage of ventilators, the American Medical...
M3 to Practice Deliveries in Sim-Center, Disappointed Entire Session Spent on History Taking
Local third-year medical student was overjoyed when she saw the schedule for her OB/GYN clerkship orientation included an hour in the simulation center practicing...