Attending Loses Perspective, Can’t Find it Anywhere
NASHVILLE, TN - "I swear I just had it," muttered 57-year-old vascular surgeon Tom Hatfield as he feverishly searched for his perspective under stacks...
Birds Wondering Why Med Student Leaving for Work So Early
FRONT YARD – When third-year medical student Krista Adams left for the hospital at 4:15 AM this morning, multiple birds in the area were...
Med Student Wastes Dying Patient’s Last Moments on Earth Talking About Damn Krebs Cycle
LAS VEGAS, NV - F**K! The Snout is at it again! Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) med student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones has been...
Med Student Excited to be First Assist for Turkey Carving This Thanksgiving
ST. LOUIS, MO - While many medical students will be spending Thanksgiving at home with their families, third-year medical student (MS3) Brent Tryhard has...
The Updated Hippocratic Oath for Health Care Professionals
I swear by Epic Hyperspace, by eCW, by Allscripts, by AthenaHealth, and by all the Coders and Accountants, making them my witnesses, that I...
Medical School Dean Welcomes 178 of the Brightest Young Minds Ever to Get Caught...
CAMBRIDGE, MA – “Booyeah, baby...” Dr. Arthur Giles, Dean of Admissions at the School of Medicine whispered under his breath before addressing the auditorium.
“Our...
Doctor Frantically Considers Options As He Realizes There’s No Toilet Paper Mid-Poop
EL PASO, TX - Facing a crisis of unheralded proportions, medicine intern Edwin Veracruz is mulling over any and all options as he realizes...
Straight-A Medical Student Eager to One Day Have Very Own Patients Who Completely Ignore...
ST. LOUIS, MO - Expressing that there would be “no greater conceivable opportunity to help others,” top-of-her-class medical student and part-time brownnoser Isabelle Wessington...
Ugly Med Student Trying to Match into Plastic Surgery Not Expected To Do Well
SEATTLE, WA - Three months ago, fourth year medical student Trevor Barlock took a deep breath and submitted his applications to integrated plastic surgery...
Medical School Board Exam Question on a Recent USMLE
A middle-aged gentleman from an ethnically-relevant background comes to see you for follow-up on his likely genetic condition among other problems. He lives happily...