medical school speech

Medical School Dean Welcomes 178 of the Brightest Young Minds Ever to Get Caught...

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CAMBRIDGE, MA – “Booyeah, baby...” Dr. Arthur Giles, Dean of Admissions at the School of Medicine whispered under his breath before addressing the auditorium. “Our...

Medical Intern Ready to Take Things to Next Level, Exchange Phone Numbers with Consultant

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NEW YORK, NY – Medical intern Cardi Accath is nearing the end of her first month of inpatient medicine and she finally feels ready...
standardized patient

Breaking: Standardized Patient Leaves AMA

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TALLAHASSEE, FL - Standardized patient Lily Huron has left against medical advice (AMA) once she game to grips that none of these medical students...

Fortune Cookies Replace Lotto Numbers with Vital Signs

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BROOKLYN, NY - In an effort to appeal to health care professionals who order Chinese food for take out because the cafeteria is closed, fortune...
medical residency match advice

AAMC Releases Helpful New Rank List Advice for Residency Match

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WASHINGTON, DC - As the rank list deadline approaches, the American Association of Medical Colleges just released its rank list strategy guidelines for the...
work burnout

FDA approves first novel drug to treat medical burnout

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TWISP, WA - The US Food and Drug Administration today approved Peaceaudi (Idongivafumab) injection for intravenous use for the treatment of medical burnout. “Medical burnout...
medical students

Straight-A Medical Student Eager to One Day Have Very Own Patients Who Completely Ignore...

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Expressing that there would be “no greater conceivable opportunity to help others,” top-of-her-class medical student and part-time brownnoser Isabelle Wessington...
fart, CNN, Anderson Cooper

Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50

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ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...
LOS

Study: Length of D/C Summary Inversely Proportional to Length of Stay (LOS)

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BETHESDA, MD - A landmark study conducted by the National Institute of Documentation (NID) has proven once and for all the length of a discharge...
medical students

Optimistic, Bright-Eyed Med Students Eager to Transform into Jaded, Burned-Out Physicians

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ATLANTA, GA - Like a caterpillar ready to mature into a beautiful butterfly, bright-eyed graduating medical students across the nation are eager to begin...