confused doctor

Attending Loses Perspective, Can’t Find it Anywhere

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NASHVILLE, TN - "I swear I just had it," muttered 57-year-old vascular surgeon Tom Hatfield as he feverishly searched for his perspective under stacks...
call room

After Successful Renovation, New Call Room is Now Optimized to Cause Full-On Depression

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JACKSONVILLE, FL - Convinced that being on-call isn't difficult enough in its own right, hospital administrators at Jacksonville Medical Center have successfully completed renovation of its...
medical student adorbs CAGE questionnaire infectious enthusiasm

Cardboard Cutout of Medical Student Receives Honors in Surgery

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General Surgery is widely considered to be one of the most difficulty rotations in medical school. Many medical students strive to earn the coveted...
tip jar

Intern Spotted Rounding with Tip Jar, Asking for Spare Change

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PITTSBURGH, PA - Medicine intern Randy McMichael has been trying to make his measly paycheck last each month.  Despite making the usual sacrifices -...
iv pole medical student

In Cost-Cutting Measure, IV Poles to Be Replaced with Eager Medical Students

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Earlier this week, administrators and health care practitioners at Birmingham Medical Center implemented a new cost-cutting measure that hopes to save...
nursing diagnosis

Report: Ability to Wear Scrubs to Work is Only Thing Keeping Health Care Professionals...

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CHICAGO, IL - According to a recent poll of nearly 20,000 health care professionals jointly conducted by the American Academy of Physician Assistants (AAPA), American...
fever defervesce

Ask a 4th-Year Med Student (Who’s Checked Out for the Year)

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Our readers get to pose tough questions to our columnist-cum-med student who is only a few months away from graduating. Dear 4th-Year Med Student Who’s...
totem poll

Med Student Begins Long, Long Climb Up the Totem Pole

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SOMEWHERE AT THE BOTTOM BUT DEFINITELY FAR FROM THE TOP - Realizing that the commonly-used phrase to depict medical hierarchies is not a metaphor, first-year...
medical students at starbucks

Medical Students Excited to Volunteer for Studies of Ebola Transmission

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SACRAMENTO, CA - In the wake of the CDC’s announcement that we still do not fully understand exactly how the Ebola virus is transmitted, several...
upset student

Medical Schools, Residency Programs in Shock as Zero Medical Students Matched This Year

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a completely unexpected development in the past 24 hours, medical schools and residency programs are shocked and confused as a...