STAT Officially Means “Maybe”
BIRMINGHAM, AL - Ever wonder why your 8 AM stat blood draw hasn’t been done even though it’s now 7 PM the next day? ...
Med Student Knows Krebs Cycle, Whoop-De-Doo
LAS VEGAS, NV - Not that Gomerblog or anyone else gives a sh*t, but second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) medical student Karen...
Med Student Yammering About Oxidative Phosphorylation, Kill Us Now
LAS VEGAS, NV - Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) medical student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones continues to cement her legacy as the most annoying...
It’s a Match! Tinder to Replace NRMP Match in Residency Programs
BOSTON, MA – With an increasing number of medical school seniors applying for The Match each year, residency programs have admittedly been looking for a...
Future Medical Student Receives Second Follow-Up Letter from Harvard: Not Accepted
COLUMBIA, OH - Dan Jennings, a pre-med student from Ohio St. University, was accepted into medical school at the prestigious Harvard University. He told his...
Med Student Struggling to Fit C-Collar onto Woman’s Cervix
BALTIMORE, MD - A first-year medical student at The Hoppin’ Johns University is struggling to place a woman's cervix into a C-collar this morning.
"You...
Fourth-Year Medical School Rotations, Here’s the Gouge
As third-year medical students begin to think about scheduling for next year, they must carefully consider how to arrange their final, and arguably most...
Roger the Resident in Tears, Freed from Medicine Captivity
ST. LOUIS, MO - Roger Springfield, a 28-year-old internal medicine resident at St. Louis University Hospital, was rescued last weekend by conservationists after being...
Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’
CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...
Fourth-Year Med Student Looks Forward to Wasting Everybody’s Time on Elective Rotations
IOWA CITY, IA - 4th-year med student Gregory Scroggins recently announced how excited he was to start wasting everybody’s time on all of his...