Teaching Team Consults Magic 8-Ball for Assistance
NEW YORK, NY - "Will my patient need placement?" intern Jamie Dreessen asked the Magic 8-Ball, shaking it solidly for 15-seconds before placing it on...
CDC: The Adjective of Pus is ‘Purulent,’ Not ‘P**sy’
ATLANTA, GA - Yesterday, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) issued an important reminder to healthcare providers today, reminding them once and...
Apple to Introduce New Surgical Gown 7 with No Sleeves
CUPERTINO, CA - Apple Medical just announced their new line of OR gear for the new year: iSurgicalGown 7. This new line takes a...
Ugly Med Student Trying to Match into Plastic Surgery Not Expected To Do Well
SEATTLE, WA - Three months ago, fourth year medical student Trevor Barlock took a deep breath and submitted his applications to integrated plastic surgery...
Medical Schools to Replace Curriculum with Year-Long Course in ICD-10 and E&M Coding
In a visionary statement, the deans of ten of this nation’s top medical schools, including four Ivy League schools announced today that they are...
Charmin Profits As July Interns Sh*t Themselves
GREEN BAY, WI - Proctor & Gamble's toilet paper brand Charmin expects to see profits soar throughout July as new interns flood hospitals in a blazing...
Genetics Professor Uses Students as Examples During Dysmorphology Lecture
“As future physicians, it’s absolutely essential for you to be able to recognize features of genetic disorders in your patients,” Dr. Lena Lombardo stated,...
Study: Patient Satisfaction Ratings Skyrocket When Patient First Seen By That One Really Slow...
SEATTLE, WA – A study published Tuesday in The Journal of Graduate Medical Education reports that patient satisfaction scores increase significantly when patients are...
Know Your Stethoscopes
1. The Disposable Stethoscope
This stethoscope can be found in contact precaution rooms, the ICU, or the pre-op area of an ophthalmology clinic. It’s made...