Medical Student Disappears in Search of Mysterious Codman Triangle

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WASHINGTON, D.C. – Arun Matthews, a 3rd year medical student has been reported missing from his third floor library cubicle since the early hours...

Roger the Resident in Tears, Freed from Medicine Captivity

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ST. LOUIS, MO - Roger Springfield, a 28-year-old internal medicine resident at St. Louis University Hospital, was rescued last weekend by conservationists after being...

Area LEGO Man Admitted with Bright Red Blocks Per Rectum

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LEGOLAND, FL - An area LEGO man is in serious condition at LEGOLAND Medical Center after he presented to the emergency department (ED) with...

Product Review: Littman’s Cordless Stethoscope

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Pros: Portable stethoscope capable of listening to human organ noises.  No battery required! Cons: The cordless nature of the device means you have no excuse...

Pharmacology Course Cancelled After Study Suggests It Influences Med Students’ Future Prescribing Behavior

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WASHINGTON, DC—Citing new research from the Pharmaceutical Research & Manufacturers of America (PhRMA) that indicates physicians prescribe drugs they learned about in medical school...

Female Surgery Resident Reliant on VA Harassment for Affirmation

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LOCAL VA HOSPITAL - In what has been deemed a natural progression of surgical training, local resident Sara Lowell now counts on her interactions with patient...
tricarboxylic acid cycle TCA cycle dying patients kreb cycle

Med Student Wastes Dying Patient’s Last Moments on Earth Talking About Damn Krebs Cycle

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LAS VEGAS, NV - F**K!  The Snout is at it again!  Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) med student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones has been...
autopsy

Nationwide Recall of Cadavers Issued After One Found Alive in Anatomy Lab

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ENCINO, CA—A nationwide recall of human cadavers was issued today after a petrified group of anatomy students at a California medical school discovered a...

Breaking News! 2014 Match Day Results Leaked Early

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NRMP HQ, WASHINGTON, DC – Friday, medical students throughout the nation will officially find out where they matched for residency.  Reports are circulating on Student Doctor...
decaf coffee

Rookie Mistake: July Intern Grabs Cup of Decaf Coffee, Defeats the Purpose Entirely

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NASHVILLE, TN - In a situation that can be described in no other way but shocking, neophyte July intern Elena Sanchez grabbed a cup...