medical student menu

Med Student Given Important Task: Find Out What’s on Today’s Menu

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NASHVILLE, TN - Instructed by her team that the task she was being given was of the utmost importance, third-year Vanderbilt University medical student...
productive cough

Getting Things Done: Cough Quite Productive Today

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HUNTSVILLE, AL - Checking off its To Do list like it's nobody else's business, patient Reynold Baker's cough is happy to report that it...
surgery

Medical Student Discovers Niche in Surgery as Edward Retractor Hands

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MADISON, WI - "That’s not my real name, but it works," stated Jimmy M. Smith, a third-year medical student from UW Madison Medical School. The...
foley catheter

Clumsy Intern Keeps Tripping Over Patients’ Foley Catheters

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BOULDER, CO - Patients, nurses, and urologists at Boulder Medical Center are starting to lose patience with intern Willie Johnson, who despite being incredibly...
physician on toilet paper coffee sit-to-sh*t 29 seconds

Doctor Frantically Considers Options As He Realizes There’s No Toilet Paper Mid-Poop

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EL PASO, TX - Facing a crisis of unheralded proportions, medicine intern Edwin Veracruz is mulling over any and all options as he realizes...
hug, hugging

Struggling Intern Asking for ‘Just One Hug’

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BOSTON, MA - "Just one hug" is all intern Philip Geary is asking, if not BEGGING, from his fellow interns, residents, students, nurses, attendings,...
55-hour ENERGY

FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
embarrassed medical studnet

Medical Student Horrified to Learn Patient Has Normal Sized Phallus

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In a shocking turn of events, third year medical student Dan Rydberg's first day of his urology rotation took a horrific turn this past...
fart, CNN, Anderson Cooper

Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50

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ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...
tricarboxylic acid cycle TCA cycle dying patients kreb cycle

Med Student Wastes Dying Patient’s Last Moments on Earth Talking About Damn Krebs Cycle

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LAS VEGAS, NV - F**K!  The Snout is at it again!  Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) med student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones has been...