Hospital Quarantine Ended After Horrifying Smell from Post-Call Resident Deemed ‘Non-Toxic’
FAR ROCKAWAY, NY - A 24-hour quarantine of 18 medical students and 15 interns was called off after CDC officials confirmed that the fumes experienced at rounds this morning in fact came from a...
Residency Programs Nationwide Call Jeopardy to Replace New Interns Lost in Stairwells
CHICAGO, IL - Residency programs nationwide - including but not limited to emergency medicine, family medicine, general surgery, internal medicine, neurosurgery, OB/GYN, and pediatrics - report that a combined 20,000 new interns are lost...
New Littmann Stethoscope Allows You to Hear One’s Thoughts
ST. PAUL, MN - Manufacturer 3M has released a new Littman Mind-Reading I Stethoscope for health care practitioners to help diagnose someone else’s thoughts, instincts, and motivations, and promises to do so with superior...
July Interns Play Crucial Role During Cardiac Arrest by Whimpering, Sucking Own Thumb
ROCKFORD, IL - Fresh-faced July intern Becky Anderson proved to be the most crucial health care provider present during a cardiopulmonary arrest called at approximately 8 PM last night on one of the floors...
July Interns Forcing Nurses to Take July Vacation in Record Numbers
MILWAUKEE, WI - Migraines, elevated blood pressures, and heart attacks are just a few things nurses are trying to avoid this month as they take July vacation in record numbers to avoid or escape...
Optimistic, Bright-Eyed Med Students Eager to Transform into Jaded, Burned-Out Physicians
ATLANTA, GA - Like a caterpillar ready to mature into a beautiful butterfly, bright-eyed graduating medical students across the nation are eager to begin their impressive transformation into what this American health care system...
Caricatures of a Medical Student, an Intern, and a Paediatrician
Here are some fantastic caricatures depicting medical Students, junior doctors, and paediatricians from a fan all the way from Ireland. If you enjoyed the cartoons, check out more at the artist's website www.eoinkelleher.com.
Oh yes, the days...
Fashion Police: Hospital Edition Weighs in on Fanny Packs
In the most recent installment of Fashion Police: Hospital Edition, host Kathy Griffin along with commentators Giuliana Rancic, Kelly Osbourne, and special guest Jennifer Lawrence, discussed and debated the fanny pack for all medical...
Controversy Over Surgery Department’s ‘Most Annoying Medical Student’ Award
DALLAS, TX - Dr. Greg Peterson, a chief resident in general surgery, has seen his share of medical students rotate through the surgery service. "They just keep getting worse," said an unenthused Peterson before...
Clumsy Intern Keeps Tripping Over Patients’ Foley Catheters
BOULDER, CO - Patients, nurses, and urologists at Boulder Medical Center are starting to lose patience with intern Willie Johnson, who despite being incredibly nice and very bright, just always seems to be tripping...