Know Your Stethoscopes

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1. The Disposable Stethoscope This stethoscope can be found in contact precaution rooms, the ICU, or the pre-op area of an ophthalmology clinic.  It’s made...

Scrub Machine Programmed to ‘Mess with Staff’

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CHICAGO, IL - Recent discoveries in computer programming have allowed programers of Dameda Scrub Machines to program a very interesting feature: the scrub machine...

Medical Subspecialties as Star Wars Characters

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The release of Rogue One: A Star Wars Story is upon us. Before we re-watch Episodes I through VII in our respective break and...
confused doctor

Attending Loses Perspective, Can’t Find it Anywhere

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NASHVILLE, TN - "I swear I just had it," muttered 57-year-old vascular surgeon Tom Hatfield as he feverishly searched for his perspective under stacks...
med students drop out

Med Students Renamed “Teeny-Tiny Whipper-Jippers

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In a unanimous vote Thursday, Lakeland General Hospital's administrative council decided to replace traditional designations on name tags with more "descriptive" names for easier...
oxidative phosphorylation

Med Student Yammering About Oxidative Phosphorylation, Kill Us Now

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LAS VEGAS, NV - Second-year University of Nevada Las Vegas (UNLV) medical student Karen Weaselsnout-Jones continues to cement her legacy as the most annoying...
white coat

Super-Aerodynamic White Coat to Shave Seconds Off Rounds

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WASHINGTON, DC - With the completion of the Sochi Olympics and the success of their “Mach 39” high-tech aerodynamic suits in propelling U.S. speedskaters...
multiple choice test

Newly-Minted Third-Year Medical Student Puzzled by Lack of Multiple-Choice Question

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Jenner Hobbs, a fresh new face on the internal medicine wards, is having trouble adjusting to his new environment. Having just finished the first...

Thanksgiving Miracle: Medical Student Bovies Family Turkey, Remembers to Suction Smoke

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Arlington, Virginia -- This Thanksgiving third year medical student at the University of Virginia and future general surgeon Tucker McMahon offered to carve the...