Thursday, May 2, 2024

Neurology

cryptocurrency meningitis

Bitcoin Users Infected with Cryptocurrency Meningitis

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ATLANTA, GA - Over the past month, volatile swings in bitcoin have led to an ominous halving of its value, which has thrown investors into a panic.  Today digital currency and its faithful followers...

Product Review: Heartbeats by Dr. Dre Stethoscopes

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Pros / The bass on these Heartbeats by Dr. Dre stethoscopes are SICK!  Besides, who wouldn't want a bluetooth stethoscope blessed by Dr. Dre? Cons / You can't actually use these stethoscopes as headphones. The One Liner / Despite...
55-hour ENERGY

FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has approved 55-hour ENERGY drinks effective immediately since improved work conditions...

Physicians Hold Drexit Vote, Doctors Exit Medicine

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KANSAS CITY, KS - A large, synchronous exhale was heard this morning as the results of Drexit, or Doctors Exiting Medicine, came in.  Millions of doctors around the country voted to leave medicine this Saturday....
unsteady gate

Hospitalist Consults PT to Assess Unsteady Gate

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VININGS, GA - Concerned that it is now high risk and a fall is imminent, hospitalist Martin Halvorson has asked if physical therapy (PT) could come to his front yard and assess his unsteady...
laughter best medicine Ativan

Breaking: Ativan is the Best Medicine, Laughter Falls to Sixth

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BOSTON, MA - Is laughter the best medicine?  Not any more.  According to a new poll of physicians and other medical providers published in the New England Journal of Medicine, Ativan is the best medicine with laughter falling...

Meet Dr. Babinski, or Dr. Tickles

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SOMEWHERE IN NEW JERSEY - Don Babinski changed the medical world.  One of the biggest proponents of tickling patients, Dr. Babinski published over 35 articles showing the benefits of tickling. Most physicians have laughed off...

This Physician Won the KevinMD Big Burnout Sweepstakes. Here’s Why.

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TWITTER – The social media giant was abuzz today when news broke that John Roberts, a primary care physician from Sioux Falls, SD, had won the much anticipated “KevinMD Big Burnout Sweepstakes.” Dr. Roberts...
adhd veterinarian

New Seizure Dogs Give Rectal Peanut Butter Diastat

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Amidst the recent overhaul of policies regarding service animals, the National Service Animal Society (NSAS) has announced a new type of service animal who has completed training and is ready to serve: Dogs who...