CDC: Medical Noncompliance Actually Caused by Virus
ATLANTA, GA - In breaking news, the Centers for Disease Control & Prevention (CDC) has discovered a new virus that causes medical noncompliance, thereby explaining a centuries-old mystery of why patients have not taken...
Nursing Student Enters OR Without Shoe Covers: Beatings Commence
WARWICK, RI - The student nurse stared nervously at the blood-red line bisecting the hallway. Scrub hat and surgical mask, check. Full breakfast and adequate hydration to prevent passing out and taking a bite...
Nurse Leaves AMA, Administrators To Do Bedside Care
DENVER, CO - On the final day of Nurse’s Week, Jill East, RN was expecting great things from her administration for all her hard work plus the 7 shifts of overtime she was mandated...
Top 8 Reasons to Become a Nurse
SILVER SPRING, MD – The American Nurses Association released results of its biennial Workforce Trends and Findings (WTF) survey on Monday. The survey polled nurses from all over the United to determine their reasons...
Breaking News: Nurses Fight Hospital Administrators to Remove Mandated Patient-to-Nurse Ratios
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The hospital administrators at Great American Hospital (GAH) are shaking in their suits today as hundreds of RNs are picketing outside. Their complaint: a recent overhaul requiring nurses to care for...
Monty Python Teaches Us About Birth & Administration
Monty Python's The Meaning of Life came out in 1983. Yet this classic scene, "Part I - The Miracle of Birth," still rings loud and clear today, from the machine that goes "PING!!!" to Michael...
Daughter of Patient Shocked to Discover There Are Other Patients On the Floor
HAYS, KS - Earlier today Ellie Opter was flabbergasted upon the realization that there were other people on the medical floor that her mother Gladys had been admitted to. “I sat here and timed...
Charting Suspended, Call Lights Disabled, Bathroom Breaks Okayed for National Nurses Week
SILVER SPRING, MD – To celebrate National Nurses Week from May 6 to May 12 this year, hospitals and clinics across the country are saying "Thank you!" by suspending all charting, disabling all call...
Patient in Room 3 Worried After Code Blues in 1, 2, 4 & 5
ATLANTA, GA - “Oh God oh God oh God!” is what Tim McConnell said to himself in a fit of paranoia after a fourth Code Blue was announced overhead in the past 2 hours....
Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and dining services have collaborated on a new turkey sandwich. It’s...