ophthalmology
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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – Top ophthalmologists announced this week that hindsight, long thought to be 20/20, is actually much closer to 20/80.  “This is a surprise to all of us,” announced David Parke, President and CEO of the American Academy of Ophthalmology.  “Our study found that hindsight is not as good as everybody thinks it is.  In fact, it kinda sucks.”

ophthalmology hindsight 20/20 20/80

The general public has long been under the impression that we have perfect 20/20 hindsight.  However, recent studies have confirmed that when the average person looks back at their mistakes, they still don’t know what they should have done differently.  “This is a big blow to everybody who ever said ‘Well, hindsight is 20/20’ in an effort to make themselves feel better for f**king up,” stated Parke.  “Turns out, your hindsight can barely read the big E on a Snellen chart.”

Research indicates that hindsight for some people can be as bad as 20/400 or even “count fingers vision.”  Sources claim that this is a rare occurrence seen almost exclusively in surgeons.  In fact, the poor quality of hindsight in surgeons has led to creation of a new ICD-10 code, “Surgical hindsight.”

When asked if ophthalmologists have found a way to improve hindsight to 20/20, Parke responded, “Theoretically, it is possible.  In a controlled experimental environment, we have been able to refract hindsight down to 20/40 with special rose-colored glasses, but any potential for improvement beyond that is purely speculative.”

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    Following a successful career as a doctor impersonator, Dr. Glaucomflecken decided to attend a real, accredited medical school and residency program. Now he spends his time treating eyeballs, occasionally forgetting that they belong to an actual human body. Dr. Glaucomflecken specializes in knowing where to look when talking to somebody with a lazy eye. He started writing for GomerBlog after being told to “publish or perish.” Follow me on Twitter @DGlaucomflecken

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