Ortho Consulted to Repair Broken Wishbone
NASHVILLE, TN - Orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley was consulted last night after the wishbone of an 18-lb. turkey was shattered by two members of the...
FDA Reminder: Baby Aspirin Not Actually Meant for Babies
SILVER SPRING, MD - Looking to clear things up to the confused American public, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has issued a reminder that...
Shhh, Doctor Physically Tucking In Patients Before Heading Home
PROVIDENCE, RI - It's not uncommon for inpatient health care professionals to say they're going to "tuck in their patients" before shift change or...
Attending Known for Long ICU Rounds Admits She is Actually Just Filibustering Her Crappy...
At the Pannus University Hospital, there is one specific attending, who preferred to remain anonymous for this article, known for exquisitely long rounds. Every...
Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean
Ad text
Actual meaning
Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital
The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...
Breaking: Gastroenterologist Thinks Patient is Full of Sh*t
COOKEVILLE, TN - A local gastroenterologist by the name of Baxter Jones completely shocked patient Mason Watts and his family when he flat out...
Hospitalists Aim to Place All Americans by 2020
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The Society of Hospital Medicine (SHM) has announced a new multibillion-dollar PBP initiative, which stands for "Place, Baby, Place!", with the...
Two Examples of Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Notes
Amazingly Subpar Lumbar Puncture Procedure Note #1
Procedure:
This is Spinal Tap.
Date/Time:
Optional.
Indication:
Infectious Diseases said it was a good idea.
Resident:
Dr. Kyle Richter, PGY-1.
Attending:
Yes.
A time-out was completed to...
Tim Howard Hired by Hospitalist Group, Blocks 16 Admissions
NORTH BRUNSWICK TOWNSHIP, NJ - Following an epic goalkeeping performance during a 2-1 defeat to Belgium, United States goalkeeper Tim Howard was soon hired by...
Latest Research Suggests That a Nice Family Prognosticates Mortality in the Intensive Care Unit
ABSTRACT
Background
A group of 1594 (667 were excluded for lack of relative personality traits) patients in a large metropolitan hospital were enrolled in a research...