Hospitalists

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

0
Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...
pumpkin spice

Hospitals Now Offering Seasonal Pumpkin-Spiced Patient Satisfaction Surveys

0
BOCA RATON, FL - Hospital administrators at Madre De Díos Medical Center will now offer seasonal pumpkin-spiced patient satisfaction surveys in order to improve...
PA

PA Furious for Being Mistaken for Nurse, Struggles to Explain She’s Not a Physician

0
CHICAGO, IL - Physician assistant (PA) Susan Jonesby was doing morning discharge planning for her employer Galen-Vaselius Orthopaedics when tragedy of unimaginable proportions ruined...

U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”

0
TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...

Hospitalist Spends Day After Christmas Returning Unwanted Admissions

0
MORGANTON, NC - Like most people in America, Dr. Lara Nottarg got some things for Christmas that she didn’t exactly want. Unlike most Americans,...
surgical management

Ortho Consults Medicine for Surgical Management

0
BIRMINGHAM, AL - In an act that most definitely crosses the line, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has consulted Medicine for surgical management of a...

Fifth Pressor Discovered: ICU Stay Extended 2 Days, No Difference in Outcome

0
LOS ANGELES, CA – Critical care physicians and nurses rejoiced Thursday at the news of a 5th vasopressor drug-class discovery. 5-omega-dopanephrinone or "Omnipress" is a...
vancomycin and zosyn soup

Recipe: GomerBlog’s Chicken Noodle Soup with Vancomycin & Zosyn

0
Ever wonder why chicken noodle soup is good for the soul?  It’s because your soul is severely infected and needs to be treated with...
social worker

Medical Clinical Social Worker Treats Hospitalist Breakdown, Early Stages

0
SALT LAKE CITY, UT - Attempting to leave on time for the first time in two years, Jen was on her way towards the...
emergency medicine physician

Breaking: Admitting Service Forgets to Ask ED Physician, “What Do You Expect Me to...

0
JACKSON, MI – In a stunning display of forgetfulness, the admitting hospitalist at Mercy Hospital has forgotten to snarkily reply to an admission request...