Hospitalists

attending physician

Doctor Horrified to Learn That Today’s Actually Thursday, Not Friday

0
NEW YORK, NY - Colleagues are watching in stunned silence as Mount Sinai Hospital hospitalist Valerie Owens holds back the tears as it hits her...
moon placement

Placement Tips: How to Place a Patient on the Moon

0
If there's something social workers and hospitalists are really good at it's placement.  But every once in a while a difficult placement comes along....
2014 ACLS algorithm

Study: The People’s Elbow is the Most Electrifying Move in All of ACLS

0
HAYWARD, CA - FINALLY!  The Rock… HAS COME BACK... to cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR)!  A new study in the New England Journal of Sports Entertainment...
nipple twist above-the-nipples

Study: Titty Twist Better Pain Stimulus Than Sternal Rub

0
MINNEAPOLIS, MN - Citing expert opinion and personal experience, the American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has put forth new recommendations on the pain stimulus...
fecal transplant recipient

Tearful Reunion Between Fecal Transplant Donor & Recipient Captured in Video

0
BOCA RATON, FL - After years searching for the kind colon which gave her bowels a new lease on life, fecal transplant recipient Faye...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

0
Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and...
arterial line circle of willis CPR emergency department butthurt audacity code shift change prior authorization otherwise stable

ICU Signout: ‘Codes Every Few Minutes, But Otherwise Stable’

0
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - During signout for the patient transferring out of the medical intensive care unit (MICU) today, third-year medical resident Louis Jenner...
"Mostly useless!" credentialing process

Hospitalist Dictation at Home Goes Tragically Wrong

0
ST. PAUL, MN - Dr. Dave Krieger was running late last Tuesday when, in retrospect, he made a terrible mistake: he decided to dictate his...
colonoscopy

Breaking: Gastroenterologist Thinks Patient is Full of Sh*t

0
COOKEVILLE, TN - A local gastroenterologist by the name of Baxter Jones completely shocked patient Mason Watts and his family when he flat out...

Nurse O.J. Simpson Can’t Ever Get a Glove to Fit

0
BRENTWOOD, CA - Geez, O.J. Simpson just can't get a break!  He has been asked over and over again to go into a patient's...